Would this be considered OCD?

L

Lvl80

Member
Joined
Dec 17, 2010
Messages
10
#1
Hey all, I'm new here.. this is long so please take the time to read it.

Note: even as I clicked on the confirmation link to confirm my account creation, I had a feeling "if you click that link and post on that site you're going to ruin your future and your girlfriend will leave you".

So I have these weird episodes maybe once every two weeks where everything seems completely out of whack. I had one today and I'll describe it as best I can, start to end.

So going through the school day, I was going to meet up with someone before I left school. They're planning on hanging out with me this weekend and I was deciding whether or not I should say something to them (I'm not going to say what I was thinking of saying because it's kind of personal). I had what I imagined to be "God" (I have no way of knowing if it was actually God or just some weird voice or feeling) in my head convincing me of why I should say it, and I had myself trying to think of why I shouldn't say it. Sometimes "God" would switch sides.

Just as a note, I don't actually hear any voice telling me what to do. It's just a very strong feeling that I think is something out there talking to me. Maybe there is or maybe it's just me, I don't know.

But so that kind of went around in my head for an hour and a half. I ended up deciding not to say it simply because it might be kind of out of place. I'm glad I didn't.

So I was walking with this person and everything was great until the last 10 or so seconds before we parted ways. That's when my real psycho episode began.

I started becoming almost completely unground from reality. I had a weird vision of everything I was going to do, say, etc. while walking to my mom's car and getting in. I even thought the exact words I would say when I got in to her car. I thought that if I do those things exactly as I thought of them and in that order that it meant that my next few days is going to be terrible or something.

I may have been walking to her car but I was completely unground from reality. I was entirely inside my own head thinking those OCD thoughts while having a panic attack. I'm feeling better now (3 hours later) because the panic attack has faded away and everything is ok. But during these attacks it's like a mix of Deja vu and OCD. During these attacks, it feels like these moments are "meant to be" and how I act during them is going to significantly change something in the near future that's going to damage something about my life.

I'm feeling much better now that the panic attack is over but I get a panic attack once every week or so, usually they're every 2 weeks. I can't stand these attacks because I don't know if people I'm with are going to notice me acting differently and start to think I'm strange or that something is wrong with me.

What do you guys think about this? What can I do to help stop these attacks when they happen?

Much thanks for your time.
 
Mayfair

Mayfair

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#2
Hey all, I'm new here.. this is long so please take the time to read it.

Note: even as I clicked on the confirmation link to confirm my account creation, I had a feeling "if you click that link and post on that site you're going to ruin your future and your girlfriend will leave you".

So I have these weird episodes maybe once every two weeks where everything seems completely out of whack. I had one today and I'll describe it as best I can, start to end.

So going through the school day, I was going to meet up with someone before I left school. They're planning on hanging out with me this weekend and I was deciding whether or not I should say something to them (I'm not going to say what I was thinking of saying because it's kind of personal). I had what I imagined to be "God" (I have no way of knowing if it was actually God or just some weird voice or feeling) in my head convincing me of why I should say it, and I had myself trying to think of why I shouldn't say it. Sometimes "God" would switch sides.

Just as a note, I don't actually hear any voice telling me what to do. It's just a very strong feeling that I think is something out there talking to me. Maybe there is or maybe it's just me, I don't know.

But so that kind of went around in my head for an hour and a half. I ended up deciding not to say it simply because it might be kind of out of place. I'm glad I didn't.

So I was walking with this person and everything was great until the last 10 or so seconds before we parted ways. That's when my real psycho episode began.

I started becoming almost completely unground from reality. I had a weird vision of everything I was going to do, say, etc. while walking to my mom's car and getting in. I even thought the exact words I would say when I got in to her car. I thought that if I do those things exactly as I thought of them and in that order that it meant that my next few days is going to be terrible or something.

I may have been walking to her car but I was completely unground from reality. I was entirely inside my own head thinking those OCD thoughts while having a panic attack. I'm feeling better now (3 hours later) because the panic attack has faded away and everything is ok. But during these attacks it's like a mix of Deja vu and OCD. During these attacks, it feels like these moments are "meant to be" and how I act during them is going to significantly change something in the near future that's going to damage something about my life.

I'm feeling much better now that the panic attack is over but I get a panic attack once every week or so, usually they're every 2 weeks. I can't stand these attacks because I don't know if people I'm with are going to notice me acting differently and start to think I'm strange or that something is wrong with me.

What do you guys think about this? What can I do to help stop these attacks when they happen?

Much thanks for your time.
Hiya. Welcome to the site. Not that I could diagnose you, as no one here can, I'm afraid... I don't know what to make of that. It kind of seems like an aspect of OCD mixed with slight paranoia, all of which are causing you panic attacks.

Have a look around the MH Issues section, and see if anything sounds familiar, that, if nothing else will give you peace of mind. :)

As for your first 'premonition', you won't ruin your future by looking in here, and if your girlfriend leaves you for enquiring about this issue and trying to fix it, then good riddance! lol. I wouldn't tell her that I'd joined, it's your business.

Seriously though. I used to have panic attacks. Really bad ones. I don't think anyone not even a single person, who hasn't experienced one, has any idea whatsoever how terrifying they can be.

Wish you well :)
 
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L

Lvl80

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Joined
Dec 17, 2010
Messages
10
#3
Yeah I personally don't care if someone would leave me for being on here.. I have stuff going on that I'm trying to fix and any sane person wouldn't leave anyone for facing their demons. And heh yeah she and everyone else I know won't ever know that I joined this forum.

That's the crazy thing about panic attacks, though. During the attacks there is no doubt that the premonitions will happen, until the attack is over and everything is calm. No one can possibly imagine what it's like to have a panic attack - 2+ hours of agonizing terror and illusion.

I'll look through that section and see if anything seems familiar to me. Thank you much :)
 
M

maudikie

Guest
#4
Doesn't sound llike OCD. How old are you? Are you wondering whaat you are going to do in the future? Let us know and we might be more constructive.
ave a good holiday time.
 
L

Lvl80

Member
Joined
Dec 17, 2010
Messages
10
#5
I'm 16. I don't think I'm simply wondering about what I'm going to do. It's like I plan it all out but then some strange feeling comes up inside of me telling me that if I do those things exactly as they are thought out that some weird, horrible terrible thing will happen.
 

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