• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

Worried mom, How to tell to my 9 year old son that he has OCD

H

HMB44

New member
Joined
Jan 16, 2015
Messages
2
Hi there! I have a nine year old son who has some very obvious signs of OCD coming on the scene. I dealt with OCD in my teen years and it still comes back to haunt me during high stress times. Things are progressing very quickly with my son and I am going to schedule an appointment for him to see a doctor. I wanted some feedback from you all about how to break the ice about telling him he "might" have OCD. I say, "might," because I'm not a doctor, although it is very clear to me. I don't want to just take him to the doctor and spring it on him there. I'd like to talk to him about it beforehand but I don't want to say the "wrong" thing to him. I think it will help that I can relate to what is going on but he is definitely experiencing it worse than I did. I've walked in on him doing "rituals" and he looks so embarrassed and it just breaks my heart. I realize that I've had so many opportunities to talk to him about it, and only I know how to talk to my kid, but I would just love some honest feedback on how to break the ice. I don't want to make him feel bad.

Thanks!
Worried Mom
 

MarlieeB

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Jan 15, 2013
Messages
25,044
:welcome: to the forum.

It's a hard one as you don't want to scare him. Maybe talk to him about the things that you do with your OCD but downplay it a little and hopefully that might make it comfortable for him but don't put much pressure on him.

Marliee x
 
pepecat

pepecat

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 19, 2010
Messages
13,913
Location
middle earth
Maybe instead of doing the 'something wrong' thing, you could gently ask him if he can tell you why he does the rituals - do they make him feel safe, less anxious, etc.....
and then maybe say when you were his age you used to do the same sort of thing because it helped you feel less scared. He might not feel so embarassed if he knows you went through the same sort of thing, but instead of doing the 'there's something wrong with you' thing, you can play it in terms of 'there are other ways to feel less scared as well', shall we see if we can try some of them?
And then you could introduce the idea of talking to people about how he feels or reassuring him that bad things aren't going to happen. That kind of thing.

Are you wanting to go down the route of therapy or other treatment, or are you hoping to deal with this without outside intervention?
 
H

HMB44

New member
Joined
Jan 16, 2015
Messages
2
Thank you MarlieeBee and pepecat for your feedback! It truly means so much. I guess I see that he is so embarrassed by his actions, I struggle with how to approach the whole thing. I like the whole idea of just simply asking him why he does it and then telling him how I used to do certain things. I am not opposed to therapy, but I guess I just hope that it is something I can help him with. Seeing that I'm struggling bringing up the topic, that's a good sign I am not cut out for the job. I worry to put it in the hands of someone else and they make him feel bad or like he is doing something "wrong." I know that the "right" doctor could offer him so much relief. It's almost like I want to go visit with the doctor before I take him in to see someone so I can get an idea of what their viewpoints are.
 
Top