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Work - should I stick it out?

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Sammisal

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Joined
Oct 4, 2008
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17
Location
London
Well, I returned to work after four weeks off last week. I went back on Wednesday, but have now been off again for three days. I really don't think I can go back. It just seems such a final decision. How do people decide?
 
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Twylight

Guest
I was an electrical engineer and had to go on a major tranquiliser

It wasn't that I couldn't do the work technicaly - it was puntuality - I still sleep odd hours in the day
 
blackdog

blackdog

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I've worked in healthcare for over 24 years. I was off with depression earlier this year and returned to work in May. I've been off sick now for nearly six weeks and am ??? planning to return to work a week next Monday. I'm not much better healthwise than I was a few weeks ago, but I've already been threatened with losing my job. I feel under so much pressure to get back, we need the money and I have no idea what else I could do. Without my job I think I may lose what little self-respect I have. But I don't know if I will be able to go back and keep going back, in which case I probably won't have a decision to make.
 
silly madam

silly madam

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Oct 22, 2008
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645
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Wiltshire
Hi both,

Would either of you guys have the opportunity to go back part time for a bit? I know thats what a few of my friends have done who suffer from depression. It helps them ease themselves back into work without it being full on.

My thoughts go out to you both :hug:
 
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Sammisal

Member
Joined
Oct 4, 2008
Messages
17
Location
London
Ahhh! It's suddenly got a lot more complicated. I just received a letter from my school. They have asked for a meeting, the beginning of the absence management procedure. I'm getting increasingly convinced about just handing in my notice. But now I don't know what to do about this meeting, or pretty much anything else. I was going to, you know, do the courtesy of notifying my manager informally soon, but it's all just confusing.

The other concern is benefits. I'm pretty sure I'm eligible in theory, although the NI contributions thing is confusing me. Time will tell, I guess.

I suppose now is the time to email my union people and my parents, who are on holiday in Canada at the moment, and who I live with.
 
silly madam

silly madam

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Oct 22, 2008
Messages
645
Location
Wiltshire
Good luck with that Sammisal.
Hope you manage to sort things out. It must be terribly scary and unsettling.
All the best.
:hug:
 
S

Sammisal

Member
Joined
Oct 4, 2008
Messages
17
Location
London
Thanks - like I said to my union rep, I have loads going on in my head, and at the same time nothing at all. I'm trying to look at the forms and see what I need to do about applying for benefits, but I can't concentrate on it at all.
 
silly madam

silly madam

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Oct 22, 2008
Messages
645
Location
Wiltshire
Just hang on in there. I know that when I am really depressed, I suffer what I can only call 'brain paralysis'. I cant even think let alone do. If you can, I would wait for a good moment to tackle it all. If youre feeling pretty shite at the moment it will only make you feel worse. If it is at all possible, ask for some breathing space. If its not, then just do one task at a time. That may make it seem less daunting. I do know what it feels like and you probably feel like throwing the computer at me because it always sounds easy when youre feeling well but in practice its almost impossible when youre low. Do let us know how things go wont you.
 
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riverofdragons

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Joined
Aug 8, 2008
Messages
274
I dont know if benefts are affected at all by quitting your job, but please check just in case!?!

Last thing you need is to be without a job and benefits - call the Jobcentre - they should be able to tell you.

Fingers crossed for you!
 
S

Sammisal

Member
Joined
Oct 4, 2008
Messages
17
Location
London
Hey both of you. Thanks for that. I'm pretty sure the benefits aren't affected by that. Even jobseekers allowance will, on occasions allow you to claim if you quit your job for a good reason.

If not, a little while ago when I was thinking about this before I made a vague plan which would enable me to live, albeit incredibly frugally, without benefits. And I still live with my parents - they're not well off, but they aren't exactly going to let me starve. Also there's always grandparents. It'll work out, because it has to.

GP has signed me off for two weeks, which means I won't be in work for that meeting, although I guess I still have to go.
 
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Twylight

Guest
Ahhh! It's suddenly got a lot more complicated. I just received a letter from my school. They have asked for a meeting, the beginning of the absence management procedure. I'm getting increasingly convinced about just handing in my notice. But now I don't know what to do about this meeting, or pretty much anything else. I was going to, you know, do the courtesy of notifying my manager informally soon, but it's all just confusing.

The other concern is benefits. I'm pretty sure I'm eligible in theory, although the NI contributions thing is confusing me. Time will tell, I guess.

I suppose now is the time to email my union people and my parents, who are on holiday in Canada at the moment, and who I live with.
It would be easier to claim benefits if your employer terminated your employment, as opposed to you resigning.
I hope it doesn't come to that.
 
blackdog

blackdog

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Sammisal, the worst thing I think is that when you are in this position you have to try and make decisions, when personally I have trouble deciding whether I want tea or coffee. It would be so much easier if someone would take the pressure off and make these decisions for us or just not hassle us for a while, take care.
 
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Sammisal

Member
Joined
Oct 4, 2008
Messages
17
Location
London
Bizarrely I don't tend to have that problem. I have, on a number of occasions made huge drastic decisions about things (eg. moving, or whatever) and then I will follow that course. I'd often thought that these are generally the right thing, for me. But I just realised something - it was exactly the same when I have decided to overdose and such things, these things are (arguably) not the best decision for me (although to be honest I'm not necessarily sure suicide is a bad thing, really).

Ok, I have to think about stuff some more. This is crap.
 
silly madam

silly madam

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Joined
Oct 22, 2008
Messages
645
Location
Wiltshire
Youre not good at the moment are you Sammisal.

I think its brilliant that you can get your stuff out on here. Please keep posting and ifi there is anything you need just let us know. Sometimes its just good to know that someone is listening and genuinely cares about you.

Chin up. You will be ok. Just believe it and it will happen.

:hug:
 
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Twylight

Guest
with lack of work there are of course financial issues

But havng all your time to yourself has it's advantages

You are in control of your lifestyle

I enjoy my mountain bike, restoring and playing electric guitars, reading, writing and in the summer months I have a voluntary job.

It's not all bad and most of the time I keep busy
 
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