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Will BPD always ruin my life?

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Stranger-967

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Jan 10, 2016
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Hi there.
I recently got diagnosed with BPD and I'm terrified. I've suffered with it for years... Compulsive lying, constant loss of relationships, loss of Jobs, loss of housing, feeling isolated, scared all the time, sometimes I don't know where I am or how I got there. I don't know who I am.
What I'm most scared of is if I'm always going to be like this? Will I always be alone and lose everyone because of my lies? Will I never know who I am? Will I stop hearing things? I just want to know if people with BPD ever get to live a happy and normal life.
 
Not_Crazy_Yet

Not_Crazy_Yet

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Jun 19, 2015
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I hope you can find the answers you seek. Hopefully someone with experience with BPD will be along. If it helps at all that post could have been written by me. Although I'm diagnosed with schizo affective disorder. I do get better at times but my meds are about to be changed to find something more effective.
 
S

simon7319

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Apr 25, 2015
Messages
48
What I'm most scared of is if I'm always going to be like this?

If you are young age BPD can be over whelming and feeling of ups and downs and crashes when something major happens or even small events. When you start getting middle age the feeling of pain may ease in some people for others it will continue or may just suddenly stop for no reason at all. As you start to learn more about your problem talk to others and read about the subject you may find you are able to settle. It very difficult for teenagers with this illness as life is more full on and at a fast rate of knots when you reach my age (we shall never say) but it slows down but for me I get very quickly swamped by overwhelming feelings and depression and so on. It very difficult to say all I will say is you have to be strong and seek help at early as possible and don’t give up. Many of us with this illness and we all have our own bags of tricks to get out when we need them the most

Will I always be alone and lose everyone because of my lies?

Who makes you feel alone in life? You can get out and join clubs and other things this way you are mixing with others taking your mind of things you don’t have to say to anyone you have BPD as they will say what’s that? Depends on what the lie is about if you think your are going to lie shout in your head STOP or use a rubber band around your wrist and give it a twang you will soon forget what you were going to lie about.

Will I never know who I am?

Hard question we feel who I am when we are lost in our own world it will come and go as it pleases in some people so I would not worry or be concern with this unless you are feeling very unhappy
Will I stop hearing things? Once more we say we hear things like a voice most often caused when we are in great distressed the voice will come more into our lives or make us want to act out or do something. Relaxation will help settle this down as it reduces the stress and tension you are feeling at the particular time

I just want to know if people with BPD ever get to live a happy and normal life

Many do live a happy life and manage the illness very well and get married have children and settle down but it’s all about understanding and letting others into your personal world otherwise you will find it a great struggle and not be comfortable with you.

Let you into a secret I am 43 and had my illness of 29 years and I will never say it will be ease run for you it. They will be lots of moments when you will feel like the world is hurting you and you feeling very depressed and low. But over a period of time you learn new skills, you want to have what other have taken for granted in life such as settling down or even renting a home and just think then your fun starts as those who had a good life lead a simple life and those with BPD lead really interesting and new adventurous life styles as they have taken for granted at an early stage we have yet to have our fun. Think about that
 
BorderlineDownunder

BorderlineDownunder

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Nov 23, 2015
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OK whoever dumped the BPD label on you was lazy

BPD is no longer a valid diagnosis

its going to be removed from the next DSM and replaced with Emotional Regulation Disorder

The compulsive lying you describe is NOT symptomatic of either BPD or ERD

Gosh these psychs make me mad :curseyou:

You may have NPD instead which is far more like the behavior you describe. You may have OCD as well, which explains the compulsive part.

Theres no point lumping you with BPD which is essentially the Cant Be Arsed Doing My Own Job basket.

A lazy diagnosis and a sign they aren't doing their jobs (eta: and/or hamstrung by the System which is backward beyond belief).

I'm sorry Im not much help

I was diagnosed with BPD only 12 months ago, almost to the day

Fast forward and it turns out I've probably got Bipolar II instead, mixed with PTSD and ERD with APD and possible PPD.

I know right. It's ridiculous.

At the end of the day what matters is this: can you function in the world or not?

If you can, you're already Considered Well. By contrast.
 
S

simon7319

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Joined
Apr 25, 2015
Messages
48
BPD sorry but it is and they are many consultants call this mental illness different types of things. I let Dr Gaynor tell you go to youtube video Dr Keith Gaynor just type his name. He talks about this and is a expert in this field. So don't say things like BPD is a none enmity when it can be confusing for those who know little about the subject. And we all call it many different things from differnt parts of the world so who cares for my it will be BPD and thats it is that no more can be said

You state that lying is not part of BPD well beg to differ as many traits of Personality are made up of different parts and personality covers a wide range of topics and goes in clusters which consultants like to use by saying cluster A or B but even then they saying it can be mixture of both and you can read from the very people who done papers on this topic put into search engine rcpsych.ac.uk you may learn something but you will have to write in the full title BPD in the site search box. I use to self harm thankfully stop so you will be stating I don't have it well I do at the end I show you how messed up I was.

Well I was diagnose 29 years ago and I will always past on what I have learnt to help those who are suffering greatly and will suggest what may help I can. And finding forum I am making myself happy knowing that I am helping a younger suffers to feel like they can achieve in life even if they have or not been diagnose with it or so very ill I will offer my total support to anyone with mental illness.

When I was a teenager and young adult man when I lost all in my life from engagement, my girlfriend baby dies, best friends, been raped when I was 7 and again at 14-17, loosing my gran and last person to see her alive at 16 in the middle of my final exams, my brother hates my illness and never talks to me, I lost loads of jobs, committed crimes, was a violent person that I would hurt someone so badly and did not care one bit, I lost my niece and nephew, committed a crime was nicked rightly so but was also told on that day my other grandmother die that afternoon, hurt myself badly loads of time.

I now have no one part from my parents who are older now and I’m caring for them and trying to be happy each time even when I cry myself to sleep at night or when I am ill I will try and help a person as I can’t love me or don’t know how love me or kiss my mother without feeling hurt and saying this now I am crying as the pain hurts or yes and I have other mental issues and cant read or write good life I have and have nothing to show for it apart from my love to help anyone of any creed or views to have fun and enjoy life as I wanted to
 
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BorderlineDownunder

BorderlineDownunder

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Nov 23, 2015
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17,160
BPD sorry but it is and they are many consultants call this mental illness different types of things. I let Dr Gaynor tell you go to youtube video Dr Keith Gaynor just type his name. He talks about this and is a expert in this field. So don't say things like BPD is a none enmity when it can be confusing for those who know little about the subject. And we all call it many different things from differnt parts of the world so who cares for my it will be BPD and thats it is that no more can be said

You state that lying is not part of BPD well beg to differ as many traits of Personality are made up of different parts and personality covers a wide range of topics and goes in clusters which consultants like to use by saying cluster A or B but even then they saying it can be mixture of both and you can read from the very people who done papers on this topic put into search engine rcpsych.ac.uk you may learn something but you will have to write in the full title BPD in the site search box. I use to self harm thankfully stop so you will be stating I don't have it well I do at the end I show you how messed up I was.

Well I was diagnose 29 years ago and I will always past on what I have learnt to help those who are suffering greatly and will suggest what may help I can. And finding forum I am making myself happy knowing that I am helping a younger suffers to feel like they can achieve in life even if they have or not been diagnose with it or so very ill I will offer my total support to anyone with mental illness.

When I was a teenager and young adult man when I lost all in my life from engagement, my girlfriend baby dies, best friends, been raped when I was 7 and again at 14-17, loosing my gran and last person to see her alive at 16 in the middle of my final exams, my brother hates my illness and never talks to me, I lost loads of jobs, committed crimes, was a violent person that I would hurt someone so badly and did not care one bit, I lost my niece and nephew, committed a crime was nicked rightly so but was also told on that day my other grandmother die that afternoon, hurt myself badly loads of time.

I now have no one part from my parents who are older now and I’m caring for them and trying to be happy each time even when I cry myself to sleep at night or when I am ill I will try and help a person as I can’t love me or don’t know how love me or kiss my mother without feeling hurt and saying this now I am crying as the pain hurts or yes and I have other mental issues and cant read or write good life I have and have nothing to show for it apart from my love to help anyone of any creed or views to have fun and enjoy life as I wanted to
im sorry if you found what I said upsetting

but the fact remains, BPD is being removed from the next DSM.

It will No Longer Be Used at all because it is viewed as an Inaccurate and Negative Descriptor.
 
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BorderlineDownunder

BorderlineDownunder

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Nov 23, 2015
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17,160
Terminology[edit]

Because of the above concerns, and because of a move away from the original theoretical basis for the term (see history), there is ongoing debate about renaming borderline personality disorder. While some clinicians agree with the current name, others argue that it should be changed,[168] since many who are labelled with borderline personality disorder find the name unhelpful, stigmatizing, or inaccurate.[168][169] Valerie Porr, president of Treatment and Research Advancement Association for Personality Disorders states that "the name BPD is confusing, imparts no relevant or descriptive information, and reinforces existing stigma."[170]

Alternative suggestions for names include emotional regulation disorder or emotional dysregulation disorder. Impulse disorder and interpersonal regulatory disorder are other valid alternatives, according to John Gunderson of McLean Hospital in the United States.[171] Another term suggested by psychiatrist Carolyn Quadrio is post traumatic personality disorganization (PTPD), reflecting the condition's status as (often) both a form of chronic post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) as well as a personality disorder.[59] However, although many with BPD do have traumatic histories, some do not report any kind of traumatic event, which suggests that BPD is not necessarily a trauma spectrum disorder.[67]

The Treatment and Research Advancements National Association for Personality Disorders (TARA-APD) campaigned unsuccessfully to change the name and designation of BPD in DSM-5, published in May 2013, in which the name "borderline personality disorder" remains unchanged and it is not considered a trauma- and stressor-related disorder.[172]
 
S

simon7319

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Apr 25, 2015
Messages
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No you are okay you can say what you like and we be both right how that. Me on my high horse again. Whoops

take care
 
BorderlineDownunder

BorderlineDownunder

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No you are okay you can say what you like and we be both right how that. Me on my high horse again. Whoops

take care
I did some further reading and was interested to read one Psych has suggested it be replaced with

PTPD

Post Traumatic Personality Disorder

but then some folk develop it without trauma so that's why they aren't leaning that way

Looks like it will become ERD or EDD in the future DSMs.
 
M

Marzk25

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Aug 27, 2015
Messages
163
Has anyone been described as having emotionally unstable personality disorder? My psychiatrist uses it all the time instead of borderline as she feels it's a better description. I would agree, I suppose it's quite close in description as emotion regulation disorder. I just don't like the term borderline when people ask what I have ie. In hospital or something they tend to think I have a split personality or similar same when my family first heard it then you have to explain :confused:
 
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