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Why should I live, I will always be sick and it will get even worse

B

Blackrose09

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 24, 2020
Messages
721
Location
Somewhere
I have all the reasons in the world to die:
I'm very sick mentally. not only depression
Can't go to work, just from time to time
I don't have anything or anyone
The people who care (maybe my brother) are affected by my condition and I don't want that
I'm no longer a human, I don't know what I am I don't recognise myself
My brain aged to much due to stress
I can't think anymore..but I'm sure there must be more
Never saw anyone more affected by mental disorders than me. I think I will stop asking for help because they don't get it.
 
D

Deleted member 91323

Guest
Blackrose, you are in so much pain and I am truly sorry. It is hard to have mental illness and having more then one is a lot to deal with. I think you have never had the chance to find out who you are and what you want. You have had several traumatic incidents and never had the chance to get therapy for that. I cannot help wonder if therapy would help you. Maybe you suffer physically due to supressed trauma and the emotional pain you are in.

What makes it worse is you have not been able to find a good doctor who understands. I think this has invalidated you and made you believe you are not worthy. You are worthy. I can see so much potential in you. You are intelligent and caring. Despite how you feel you are always very polite. You are a kind person, Blackrose.
 
B

Blackrose09

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 24, 2020
Messages
721
Location
Somewhere
I'm ashamed by what I post on this forum.

Please delete my thread.
 
D

Deleted member 91323

Guest
I think writing out thoughts is helpful. It helps us to understand and be able to support you. I do not see anything shameful in anything you have written. Maybe you are just not used to opening up so you feel uncomfortable. You have not written anything wrong.
 
Tawny

Tawny

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
8,340
Location
England
I always felt that nobody else had gone through as much as i had. I still don't think there are many people in my situation. That is probably such an ignorant thing for me to say. It is probably wrong but it was how i felt. Rightly or wrongly, when something feels so beyond words, that is what we think.

There must be though. I cannot be the only one. Many people like me are probably dead, died from accidental suicide.

The sad thing is, if we are similar, you are before and i am after.

Here where i am now is better and safer than where you are right now. I made it through, only just. I don't know what is ahead of me, but i am glad i am here and not where you are.

People don't need to understand, it is just nice that they care and i care, we care.
 
S

SunnyDaze

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2017
Messages
4,150
Location
The couch
It sounds like you need to get help dealing with your past traumas.

I'm making that assumption based on your posts I have read.

I hope you can find the help you need.

Hugs
 
N

Ninja3088

Member
Joined
Oct 2, 2020
Messages
15
Location
Ashland,oregon
Hi there. Please stay strong. We care about you. Don’t give up. There will be an answer. Don’t stop taking the steps that you can to get a little better each day. And if medication isn’t helping be willing to try different medications. Sometimes it can take a long time to find something that works. You have a ton to live for. Remember, the disease will try and tell you otherwise but it’s the disease talking. Don’t give up.

Ninja
 
A

aisha23

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 29, 2019
Messages
1,398
Location
UK
I have all the reasons in the world to die:
I'm very sick mentally. not only depression
Can't go to work, just from time to time
I don't have anything or anyone
The people who care (maybe my brother) are affected by my condition and I don't want that
I'm no longer a human, I don't know what I am I don't recognise myself
My brain aged to much due to stress
I can't think anymore..but I'm sure there must be more
Never saw anyone more affected by mental disorders than me. I think I will stop asking for help because they don't get it.

please continue to post here and tell us how you are feeling

I know it doesn't sound like much in the grand skeme of things, but we do care. a lot

you have friends here

x
 
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