Why has my life turnt upside down :’(



Jan 25, 2019
Hello Guys,

I have been on this website for quite a while now and i enjoy sharing my experiance’s on a day to day basics on here so i feel like im not so alone.

So bascially i suffer from anxiety and depression and the last 3/4 months these two illnesses have gone from 0-100 and are seriously stronger than ever before and causing my life to be a living nightmare. Everyday i feel this gut wrenching feeling of dread and sorrow sometimes its worse than others, i havea a girlfriend and family yet everyday i feel so alone even with people around me. I don’t want to see my friends anymore or do any activities i used to do when i was my “normal” self. I cant take my girlfiend out like i used to, i also suffer from panic disorder so i cant go in certain places or cope in some situations. Of late i have had extreme health anxiety also so i always think i am dying of an illness even after having numerous checks from doctors and a blood test, my results said my thyroid is a bit under active, does anyone know can that cause sereve depression and thoughts of ending it all? Also my cell count is high which i know is due to smoking.

I want to go to the doctors and see if i can get medication for my depression as its out of hand and i want my life back, but due to my health anxiety and panic disorder i struggle to even go into the doctors surgery without having an anxiety attack so i tend to aviod going to the doctors so its a vicious circle which is really getting me down. I have changed my diet and i have cut down my smoking by a huge amount yet i still feel so depressed and down everyday...

I mean if anyone can explained to me how depression feels would be great because i feel like im dying of a serious illness at the moment, due to:

- Lack of energy
- Fatigue
- Sereve bouts of sorrow and sadness
- Feel breathless and like im going to cry
- My body constanly feels heavy
- I take things out on people close to me
- I believe someone has cursed me
- I contemplate suicide as i feel ill never feel happy and normal again.
- Muscle aches and pains
- Sometimes feel sick

Are these symptoms of a mental health issue or am i physically unwell... ive never experianced “depression” like this or anxiety before so i dont know if its depression or not? Even after having all these tests with doctors i still think im dying due to the non stop and dangerous symptoms i feel each and everyday. I currently have sertraline at home which my doctor gave me a couple of months ago when i last got the courage to go there, will sertraline help these symptoms im feeling? Or is it my thyroid? And if i take setraline dont you feel even more low and anxious sometimes when you first take them and im scared if i feel any lower ill do something stupid.

Any help would be greatly apperciated and if anyone else is experiancing this id love to hear from you... thank you.


Well-known member
Jan 4, 2013
I'm not a dr, but it's possible you have both a physical and mental illness.
The under active thyroid can cause symptoms of depression.
Pain can cause depression to.
Keep visiting your dr until you get the answers you deserve. Ask if you can have a home visit.
Good luck


Feb 5, 2019
You sound like a really positive person, and I love that smiley face you put on the post. You will get advise hear and a helping hand, people will help. Your energy levels need to be lifted then you'll start to feel so much stronger. I'm logging off now for the night but will be glad to help as will others over coming days/weeks.

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