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Why don't they leave me alone to cope like before?

J

Jazzrara

Member
Joined
May 25, 2021
Messages
21
Location
England
Maybe not the place to post this, but I'm not sure. I have recently been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder/Depressive type, but have had mental health problems for years. The only thing that's helped me really really cope with them sadly, is that I just prefer to try to deal with it on my own. After years of going through the mental health services and seeing CPN's, etc... Even some in the Mental Health services thought this was best because it was leading to self harm when I was pushed to do things and taken out of my comfort zone.

Just recently I had to contact my doctor though because my sleep pattern is all over the place. My sister is very poorly, and I just wanted to be there for my sister instead of sleeping though the day on and off. Now the doctor I spoke with wants me to take a more proactive approach because he has an interest in mental health. He wants me to be involved with the mental health teams again at his surgery and speaking about my experiences, which I don't find helpful at all.

I explained to the GP this takes me out of my comfort zone because under the Mental Health teams I wasn't able to make progress in the past and they only ended up referring me back to my GP. If I missed an appoint these Mental Health teams they weren't happy and made me feel a failure basically, or if I wasn't progressing I was made to feel I had failed because they would just refer me back to the GP.

I guess my question is this. Why are they starting all this up again and setting me up to no doubt fail again and cause me more anxiety and paranoia with appointments? I try and cope and just try to get on with it because they told me there were no magic wands often enough, so why introduce this pressure again? They just seem very pushy for me to do this again even when I've explained how it makes me feel. They say issolation will do me no good even though I've told them appointments and other things have made me feel worse sometimes reulting in self harm. Sorry for the long post, but I just can't get my head around this.
 
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emmaleemochizuki

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 13, 2020
Messages
171
Location
London
I completed relate to this, sometimes I am just better by myself, but I also appreciate that I am with services, because I have patterns of relapses that requires intensive interventions very quickly, and that wouldn't be possible if I'm only under primary care.

But I do understand. I get more anxious sometimes being challenged and having to talk about things in appointments that sometimes it is just better not to. I suppose it is probably finding someone you actually feel comfortable with, and working collaboratively with them and maybe stating your concerns and worries. And perhaps reducing the frequency of appointments might help, because then it is not as intense?

I had CPNs in the past that I just did not get with, and could not talk to, it was more stressful than it was helping and I literally came out of appointments crying. But my current CPN I actually don't mind, it took a while though, like at least a couple of months of seeing her weekly, sometimes more than weekly cos I was in a bit of a relapse, but eventually she actually listened, and appreciated what I want and don't want in terms of services.

I hope you find the right balance xx
 
R

ramboghettouk

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Founding Member
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17,427
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when i was harrassed by problem families i said to a friend i just want to be left alone, she said thats exactly what they are doing
 
J

Jazzrara

Member
Joined
May 25, 2021
Messages
21
Location
England
Thanks for your reply and I'm glad you can relate to some of it and that you have found the right balance. With me though some of these people frustrate the life out of me. When I first started with mental health problems years ago, I tried to hide it. I used to make excuses why I wasn't going out with friends, etc, until I became totally reclusive and ended up losing my girlfriend. This is when the GP and mental health services became involved, but I couldn't explain to them half of what I was experiencing because I'd basically lost everything by then and was upset by all of it. They ended up saying I had anxiety and depression, but gave me no medication to take.

The mental health team (CPN's) then got involved and would try to get me out of the house, and when I couldn't do this, they would just refer me back to my GP. This just lead me to drinking alcohol to stop the problems I was having, and I used to self harmed. But they then had the audacity to blame my mental health problems on alcohol, which is something I wasn't doing when I first started with mental health problems. I only drank because I wasn't medicated, but gave it up some years ago now. So, yeas, lost a lot of trust in these people.

However, they always come back with the alchol question every time even now years later, without even asking me about my alcohol intake. They just put it in every note that I've had an alchol problem when we haven't even spoken about it. I've just now noticed for example that this GP I spoke to has mentioned alchol problems in the past in some of the notes I read online. He never once asked what my alchol consumption was though.
 
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emmaleemochizuki

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Apr 13, 2020
Messages
171
Location
London
Definitely once you had one problem at one time, it basically get stuck on your records, and regardless of whether it is still relevant years later, they just don't forget it do they...
 
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ramboghettouk

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Founding Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2008
Messages
17,427
Location
london
Definitely once you had one problem at one time, it basically get stuck on your records, and regardless of whether it is still relevant years later, they just don't forget it do they...
and gps and psychiatrists who to your face will tell you your stabilised on drugs and as long as you take the drugs theres nothing wrong with you, still think it's relevant to declare it,
 
L

llittlelostlady

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Mar 11, 2021
Messages
702
Location
England
Just ignore them, mhs they are ego obsessed tits

be there for your sister when you can xx
 
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