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Why are we hated? (23 year old sociopath)

SomeGuyWeKnow

SomeGuyWeKnow

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So I recently got diagnosed as a high functioning sociopath with narcissistic tendencies. I quickly learned that the world doesn't take too kindly to my kind. People started distancing themselves from me.

Every online article talks about the damage I can cause and paints me as a villain. I soon realised that I live in a world that hates and fears people like myself.

Yes, I do have a completely different perception of the world. I freeze when someone gets emotional in my presence because I lack empathy. Yes, I'm a skilled manipulator. But there's so much more going on underneath all of that. Things that those online articles conveniently neglect to mention.

I have hopes and dreams of my own. I can fall in love. I can get my heart broken. I can be happy, sad, angry and everything in between.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to make myself out to be a victim, and by no means do I feel sorry for myself. I like who I am and how I am.

But I can't shake this feeling that myself and people like me are feared and hated because we're misunderstood. After all, it's natural for people to fear that which they don't understand.

But is it fair for us to be shunned because of something beyond our control? Is it right that we have to force ourselves to hide who we really are?
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Hi,
Welcome to the forum
I'm so sorry for what your going thru, we are ill and shouldn't have to hide away etc
Take care
 
daffy

daffy

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Hi and welcome
I’m sorry that you feel like this about yourself but a lot of high functioning sociopaths run very successful businesses . It was even said that one of our prime ministers was one . It doesnt have to be a bad thing. You have certain abilities why not use them to your advantage.
 
calypso

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I think the fear comes from the damage that you can do. But I agree with daffy, why not look at being into business. You are probably well suited for a role which is about cut and thrust of life.

It is tricky one isn't it? So often sociopaths are seen as violent but the vast majority are not. I knew a surgeon once who was at the top of his field and was also clearly a narcissist and sociopathic. I think the job suited him to a tee. So there are important role models out there.

You lack empathy, but you can learn what others do when they empathise and see if it can be learned in some way theoretically for you.

I am pleased that you are happy with who you are though.
 
SomeGuyWeKnow

SomeGuyWeKnow

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Thanks all 3 of you. I really appreciate your open mindedness and your advice. I feel a bit more self-assured now. And as for my career...I'm a senior law student...and I'm not half bad at it:), so your advice about me going into business makes me feel pretty confident about my future.
 
calypso

calypso

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I hope you do well in Law. A barrister would be very good role for you as you can be ruthless in getting to the truth of a situation. Again, being a sociopath need not be a bad thing as such.
 
Lone Rider

Lone Rider

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So I recently got diagnosed as a high functioning sociopath
I find that highly unlikely as sociopathy is not a diagnosable condition. I'm sure you meant AsPD.

Can you explain what you mean by 'high functioning' and how you managed to meet the criteria for a diagnosis of AsPD while being 'high functioning'. Which traits of AsPD currently apply to you?

Every online article talks about the damage I can cause and paints me as a villain.
Those online articles aren't about 'you' though. They're not pointing a finger specifically at you, so why you're taking it so personally is beyond me.

I soon realised that I live in a world that hates and fears people like myself.
I highly doubt anyone even knows what you are when you're walking the streets like everybody else. If you're as high functioning as you claim then you know how to blend in well, so you should appear as just another average Joe to most people. Just another face in the crowd.

Yes, I do have a completely different perception of the world.
What is your perception of the world?

I freeze when someone gets emotional in my presence because I lack empathy.
I've never known a lack of empathy to cause someone to 'freeze' before. I lack empathy and it doesn't make me freeze up. I just feign the appropriate emotion.

Why do you freeze and what exactly does that mean?

Yes, I'm a skilled manipulator.
And yet you freeze instead of feigning emotion...

But there's so much more going on underneath all of that. Things that those online articles conveniently neglect to mention.

I have hopes and dreams of my own. I can fall in love. I can get my heart broken. I can be happy, sad, angry and everything in between.
I'm not so sure you're the sociopath you think you are. You're definitely not a psychopath anyway.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to make myself out to be a victim, and by no means do I feel sorry for myself. I like who I am and how I am.

But I can't shake this feeling that myself and people like me are feared and hated because we're misunderstood. After all, it's natural for people to fear that which they don't understand.
And that's another reason why I don't think you're a sociopath. Sociopaths use people and discard them like trash when they're done with them, and you think you're simply misunderstood, lol.

But is it fair for us to be shunned because of something beyond our control? Is it right that we have to force ourselves to hide who we really are?
Unlike you, I don't feel forced to hide who I really am. Well, I do to a degree, but the main reason sociopaths and psychopaths wear a 'mask' is to appear like everybody else in order to use people to get what we want because what we want usually only benefits ourselves and often involves malicious intent.

There is a saying I like, "The wolf does not care for the opinions of the sheep"

Not much of a wolf, are you...
 
shayshay

shayshay

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Don't waste your time getting bothered about what people think about you. Unless you've got your possible diagnosis, "symptoms" or what ever tattooed on your face, most people won't figure it out. If they do, learn how to blend in better. Of course that shouldn't be an issue if you are high functioning. I don't get it why anyone should know anyway.

Learn the rules of the game and play your cards right. You don't have to freeze when someone gets emotional - teach yourself the best ways to react to that in a way that will work for your benefit. Lack of empathy isn't a problem, if you know how to play your part. That shouldn't be difficult considering the fact that you in fact have personal experiences with emotions.

Is it right that you have to hide who you are? Well.. Who cares? The fact is, it's only reasonable to keep your mouth shut about certain things. The more people know about you, the harder it can be to do what you want to do and achieve by using them. Appearing to be like most people will work for your benefit, not against you.
 
brandothePSychopanda

brandothePSychopanda

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Because most people are self-righteous fucking phonies.fuck what the mainstream thinks. Be yourself that's all you can do don't feed into this garbage it's all lies
 
M

Mary26

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It's because people want to protect themselves from being hurt, deceived, manipulated. People need authentic connection and if someone pretends to connect but if it isn't genuine they feel betrayed. (Since you asked).But since you say that you can love, I wonder if you are able to feel some level of empathy. If someone you love is hurt, for example, do you care about how they feel apart from how it affects you? If you do, then you are capable of compassion, which (I think) comes from empathy.
 
jajingna

jajingna

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Who is the "we" in the thread title anyway? Is there some sociopath coalition out there?
 
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