whos gonna want people like us?

[DIZZY]

I suffered post natal depression and subsequently believed i was so wretched and worthless that my son was better off away from me.

I went off the rails and spent years within the controlling world of a gang culture who i believed were friends, when i got the courage to leave i had to start all over and face up to my past, and build a relationship with my son.

that led to my emotional overload and work stresses pushed me over the edge...I asked for help and am on meds now and CBT but even when i am more human again whos gonna want me? I have nothing to offer, I cant forgive my past so how could anyone else?

Im not looking here for forgiveness, just hope.

 

[keepsafe]

Hi Dizzy
Just want to welcome you and say I hope you get some support here.

KS

 

[DIZZY]

thanks KS, i hope theres a light at the end of this tunnel

 

[Fruit Loop]

Hello Dizzy,

Welcome to this site.

There is always light at the end of the tunnel, just a small glow at first but it does grow brighter.

 

[DIZZY]

Love the name Fruit Loop! if nothing else at least ive smiled today, first time in months, Thanks

 

[Fedup]

I suffered post natal depression and subsequently believed i was so wretched and worthless that my son was better off away from me.

I went off the rails and spent years within the controlling world of a gang culture who i believed were friends, when i got the courage to leave i had to start all over and face up to my past, and build a relationship with my son.

that led to my emotional overload and work stresses pushed me over the edge...I asked for help and am on meds now and CBT but even when i am more human again whos gonna want me? I have nothing to offer, I cant forgive my past so how could anyone else?

Im not looking here for forgiveness, just hope.

Hello and to MHF.

Past is past , concentrate on your future & son.

 

[unlucky]

Thats exactly how I felt, I have always been made to feel worthless and my daughters father was a violent controlling bad man (Plenty stronger words), I thought I'd never find anyone cos who would want me but I got married las year to the best, most understanding man in the world. If I can do it anyone can. Good luck.

 

[DIZZY]

Thanks Emac, its hard to imagine anyone could take me on, so thanks for giving me some hope that theres someone out there for me, just gotta get over freezing in public, too many people scare me, thats why im on sick from work, its a call centre and i just cant block out all the noise.

 

[Fruit Loop]

Hello Dizzy,

If I am glad you are smiling, that has made me smile now

You sound to have taken some big and brave steps already. It took me Four years to be brave enough to ask for help. Well done and I wish you all the best. Take care.

 

[unlucky]

I 'never ever' thought I'd find anyone and I wasn't even looking. Don't worry about finding someone, if its meant to be it will be!! Gawd, how sanctimonious do I sound?? I do apologise, I hope you get what I mean though!!

 

[DIZZY]

Does the medication really help long term? now im feeling more human im finding things a little woolley and hard to do automatic things, simple routine things that i could have done blindfolded before, i dont know if the meds are holding me back now or if my progress is because of them, .. any advice ??

 

[Dollit]

Hi Dizzy and welcome.

Don't give up the meds just because you feel better, chances are you'll stop and be back to square one. Ask for the dosage to be reassessed and perhaps it just needs dropping a little. People can manage without medication but it's not wise to do it too early on, it can be a false stability.

 

[Apotheosis]

Hope wears thin after a while - I'm sick of being stuck on the meds & thrown on the rubbish heap; with so little care or understanding - & sick of being alone - it's pointless - all of it.

 

[Dollit]

I'm really sorry you're feeling like that Apo, it seems I live in the magic postcode area