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where did my mum go wrong? where did i go wrong?

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szdreamer

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Sep 26, 2016
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uk
my dad has always been the strongest character growing up but i think i was in conflict between my mum and dad, i always looked up to my dad and he was like the pillar that held me up but my mum was having problems so it was a conflict between my mum and dad 'which one should i care about the most'

my mum started going deaf growing up and then her sight was going with RP so the focus came off my dad and was on her and thats where the whole sorry state of me began (i think) i mean i'm just guessing but it makes sense, i think thats what my mental illness stems from.
 
Foxjo

Foxjo

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All of this isn't your fault, try not to blame yourself. Its hard growing up i think we have all challenged our parents at this time its what we do.
Are you getting any help for your mental illness? Are you on any meds or under a CMHT?
Hugs
Fox
 
J

Jonathan_P

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Aug 6, 2016
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291
A saying I learned from Susan Jeffers ("Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway") is:

"Everyone does the best they can with what they have at the time." And in my experience, this has been true. Maybe you don't realize it, however you did everything you could for your Mum at the time. And that's nothing to feel down about.

HTH.
Jonathan
 
S

szdreamer

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uk
if my mum was normal maybe i'd hae been ok but who do you blame for that
 
S

szdreamer

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yes, i take meds and i see a psychiatrist
 
J

Jonathan_P

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This isn't about assigning "blame." (Although, I agree it's tempting to do that to make sense of our illness.)

There could be several factors that contributed to you developing Sz. (Genetic, environmental, etc.)

However none of that stuff is important. What is important is how you respond to your illness. As I have shared before, the most important aspect for my recovery was to learn something from my experiences. As Foxjoe has in her signature:

"What doesn't kill me makes me stronger."

Keep Moving Forward - YouTube
 
S

szdreamer

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Sep 26, 2016
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50
Location
uk
i try and not blame anyone or anything, i really like my mum even though she is a pain in the butt sometimes and she is all i have now, i just was looking for an explanation or a reason for all of this that has happened,

like i want to try and explain it in simple terms and try to make sense out of it, unravel the mysteries of my illness and who knows then maybe i could start to heal better.
 
BorderlineDownunder

BorderlineDownunder

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Nov 23, 2015
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you've probably got the exact same MH Profile a direct relative had, but they were just called dotty and never diagnosed.

a lot of this crap is genetic. Id estimate, MORE than 50% Myself. it is pronounced in my family tree, undeniably inherited. the profiles are so similar - zero psychosis, mood disorders, self harm, addiction.

Sure nuture can cause MH Problems but the potential has to be inherited imo.
 
S

szdreamer

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Sep 26, 2016
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uk
my grandad had it on my dads side but I never knew him, apparently he tried to commit suicide, my dad found him, he survived but got throat cancer in later life (ironic I guess)

I feel sorry for my dad who had to deal with his dad and then me both with sz
 
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BorderlineDownunder

BorderlineDownunder

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Nov 23, 2015
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my grandad had it on my dads side but I never knew him, apparently he tried to commit suicide, my dad found him in a pool of blood, he survived but got throat cancer in later life (ironic I guess)

I feel sorry for my dad who had to deal with his dad and then me both with sz
yep

like I said, probably no one did anything "Wrong" often its in your genes.

in another few generations sz will be curable also so will most of our MH Issues.

:hug:
 
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