• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

When did your symptoms first present?

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Nosense

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May 16, 2021
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USA
Problem is not sure, i know by 14 was informed socially maladaptive.

But thats another issue. I am wholly aware my situation is caused by the treatment i received.

13 first attempt at suicide.
 
Kabuki

Kabuki

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May 25, 2021
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43
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Radio Rentals - just left of Fraggle Rock!
I was 5 years old, I remember it like it were yesterday. I felt like there was something in my mouth like a gob stopper. I found it hard to speak and kept demanding that it be removed. Much to the horror of the Adults around me, who could not remove let alone see this obstacle I claimed to have in my mouth. They got very angry with me, cause they thought I was making it up. I also saw; what I affectionately (hah) refer to as the Shadow men, amongst other things, but the Gob Stopper was the first experience that happened a few times and was really frightening and very real for me.
 
Signofthetimes

Signofthetimes

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Mar 1, 2021
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1,106
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California
I was 5 years old, I remember it like it were yesterday. I felt like there was something in my mouth like a gob stopper. I found it hard to speak and kept demanding that it be removed. Much to the horror of the Adults around me, who could not remove let alone see this obstacle I claimed to have in my mouth. They got very angry with me, cause they thought I was making it up. I also saw; what I affectionately (hah) refer to as the Shadow men, amongst other things, but the Gob Stopper was the first experience that happened a few times and was really frightening and very real for me.
Floating white shadow images moving across the hallway at night. My fear went eventually to enjoying watching them. Age 6-10ish. Stopped somewhere around 10. I got yelled at for not being able to explain not feeling well.
 
AppleJacks99

AppleJacks99

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May 4, 2021
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Arkansas
I also used to be real paranoid at night time, hearing noises etc. I had a strobe light in my room, that I would unplug and it would still go off. It was very frightening, and seeing "red eyes" everywhere watching me from the window or the closet. I was home alone a lot. I also frequently dreamed of running down a road with nothing but snakes, jumping up and biting me all over. I always wanted to be the center of attention, until other kids started talking about me, and I became a recluse, and have been so ever since. It's hard to be around people who are inherently opposed to who you are, so that's why I prefer my own company. I get tired of trying to please other people and pretend. I have so many personalities around other people, they end up contradicting one another. Crowds are hard.
 
AppleJacks99

AppleJacks99

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Arkansas
I know it sounds crazy, but I was a huge believer in "aliens" as well. X-Files scared me. I lived out in a very rural area and I remember huge lights in the sky that would follow our car home, and I was always scared at home by myself at night.
 
Kabuki

Kabuki

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Joined
May 25, 2021
Messages
43
Location
Radio Rentals - just left of Fraggle Rock!
@AppleJacks99 Me too - Aliens that is, not so much now. I know I'm getting bad, when I'm hearing random voices that mean nothing like: "Your shoes are in the garden!" is one, or "turn the radio off" I don't own a radio! :rofl2:

I feel you my friend, I usually end up in an eye roll competition with some folks I meet up with. I'm not sure if it's because I read people, like facial expressions, eye movements, they come up like flash cards in my mind. I can tell if there is a disconnect with someone, or even if they are lying. It's un-canny and the only time my brain processes information with lightening speed. Like you, it makes it hard for me to be around most people. Still we needn't give up hope. Everyone has their TRIBE, the people who are on the same page as you. I hope I have found my TRIBE! :grouphug:
 
AppleJacks99

AppleJacks99

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Joined
May 4, 2021
Messages
122
Location
Arkansas
@AppleJacks99 Me too - Aliens that is, not so much now. I know I'm getting bad, when I'm hearing random voices that mean nothing like: "Your shoes are in the garden!" is one, or "turn the radio off" I don't own a radio! :rofl2:

I feel you my friend, I usually end up in an eye roll competition with some folks I meet up with. I'm not sure if it's because I read people, like facial expressions, eye movements, they come up like flash cards in my mind. I can tell if there is a disconnect with someone, or even if they are lying. It's un-canny and the only time my brain processes information with lightening speed. Like you, it makes it hard for me to be around most people. Still we needn't give up hope. Everyone has their TRIBE, the people who are on the same page as you. I hope I have found my TRIBE! :grouphug:
What's your diagnosis if you don't mind me asking?
 
AppleJacks99

AppleJacks99

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Joined
May 4, 2021
Messages
122
Location
Arkansas
Diagnosed BPD w/ Bipolar 1? and generalized anxiety disorder. When I was little I was prescribed Ritalin, so maybe a little ADHD. To be honest, I haven't been diagnosed with it as an adult.

Also, other cluster B and OCD traits. A lot of it seems debatable.
 

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