• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

When did your schizophrenia first start and was there any previous mental health issues before?

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llittlelostlady

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And what is so much to understand in this world? Otherwise, isn't the inability to communicate a social phobia? I was very good at school, but I'm frustrated for that reason, my bosses feel this nervousness and they don't like me. People I've thought were stupid do much better than I do in life, so there's no point in talking about aikyuta. How old are you? Otherwise, with the pandemic, it will be difficult to find new contacts. You just have to be patient.
I often have nothing to say to people whom talk to me.

I might like them or have no problem with them but thinking of things to say when making social chit chat is hard. Unless they touch on a subject I find interesting I am stuck. General every day life and mundanity does not fascinate me but things like nutrition do for example.

My sense of humour is weird, i am amused by myself and by others when they do daft things but they take it too personally. My sense of humour is self depricating but i mean no harm by it.

I always say my ego can take it but its not because i have a big ego, i just dont have one. I cant stand this societies obsession with ego. I love studying and learning and research is the love of my life but this world makes it all about worthiness...i dont care about that, i care about the research...its fascinating.

I am scared to say anything incase they take it personally

I can't humour things
I can't make observations
i can't say anything without it being wrong somehow...

I cannot be free to be myself as people misunderstand me and take me and themselves too seriously.
 
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llittlelostlady

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As to stupid...well when people keep saying a bleeding rectrum is a mental health symptom what am I supposed to think?
 
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llittlelostlady

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I have had long running health issues that I now KNOW to be autoimmune but the worlds keeps putting every symptom I get into the mental health category as though I can never get sick with anything.

It is ridiculous...I am flesh and blood, my body gets ill but no one understands they think my physical symptoms are not real.

Their expectations are too high....and they won;t accept i get sick and reset them to something more realistic.

I have no problem with people with learning issues, i wanted to help them or teach them for godsake.

Even if i was smart with an iq of 143 i wanted to share it, to help others with it out of compassion for them...

But they are driving me insane.....
 
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llittlelostlady

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I talk about myself alot as i was trying to solve my problem, although i am more of a puzzle solver than a problem solver perse...i am my own riddle. I have spent a life time trying to figure myself out but i cant stand having to talk about myself all the time.

I can appear self absorbed but its not in the same way that others seem self absorbed...there is no ego.I AM NOT interested in ego.

I have to use my own view of things to bounce off....or I cant even begin to understand the world of another.
 
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llittlelostlady

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sorry if i sound like i am ranting, i am not so much as desperately trying to explain...

I have to solve it, i am lonely
 
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llittlelostlady

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I don't hate myself though...my voices are obsessed with self hatred...i hate self hatred.

It hurts me to see people hating themselves and I am trying to solve my problem i just cant solve it
 
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llittlelostlady

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Never hate yourselves please....its horrible
 
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llittlelostlady

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its not stupidity i hate its creulty and ignorance
 
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toto

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I didn't feel like you were bothering me at all. What I felt was that you were talking about yourself with a hidden desire for someone to understand you, point out your mistakes, and heal you. You're looking for help, I didn't feel anything else. But the things you describe - the humor, the problem of coming up with a topic to talk to someone you like ... that's what normal people have all the time. You know? So far, except for the voices, there is nothing abnormal in you. What I have noticed in autistic people with Down syndrome or lack of opinion is
 
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toto

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a great shyness, they talk like robots, the whole behavior is like a robot, but this is also typical for people with social phobia. The treatment is to talk and talk, to fight until it stops making an impression on you. Instead of avoiding contacts, keep them. As far as research is concerned, what research are you talking about that is interesting to you? Because I also like to read about it and I think that if someone with autism is attracted to science, then he is not autistic, but a person with different interests. I have a feeling that there is a lot of speculation about mental health, too. To be diagnosed at the age of 4 is like a sentence.
 
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toto

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In my country, there is still no early diagnosis, no mandatory mental examinations to put you in a normal school. And obviously better. I have a friend who did not speak for 3 years, then suddenly spoke as an adult. Great, smart, with a great career, with a lot of friends, his IQ must be like yours or higher. What would have happened if someone had called him autistic? He would accept his individuality (super intelligence) as a disease.
 
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toto

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Only voices, as I told you, are a symptom of illness for me. My direct observations are that they appear in insomnia for more than 3 days. If you sleep and still have them, I have no explanation. Bleeding from the rectum should be examined by a gastroenterologist and there can be no question of a psyche here. It could be an allergy. Stop the milk and see the result. Generally for allergy tracking
 
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toto

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you go on a diet for 1 week - for example only rice and potatoes, then you add 1 new food and monitor for effects.
 
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toto

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And again for the voices ... my hypothesis is that during psychosis due to insomnia the brain pressure increases, parts of the brain swell and narrow different spaces, the contact between different parts of the brain leads to the formation of temporary new connections and this explains the inadequacy (just touch parts you shouldn't). Something like a short circuit. Are you sleeping well? (Important question)
 
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