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What's wrong with me?

  • Thread starter Memememememememe
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Memememememememe

Memememememememe

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I feel nothing but pain 24/7 in every way possible does anyone have this? Why won't it stop? Please answer if you got the same problem or if you just want to say something, what's wrong with me?? I feel possessed! I mean it, this is serious and I don't know what it is!
 
Memememememememe

Memememememememe

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I feel bad in so many ways
 
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WhySoSerious

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Hi,

Firstly I would like to know what exactly "pain" means. Anger? Anxiety? Unhappiness? Worries? Stress?

Break it down as much as you are able. What is the actual emotion?
Then look at what prompts the emotion... any particular situations? Bodily sensations?
We then need to find out what you DO that keeps you in the position you are in. What do you DO? How do you BEHAVE when you feel awful?

Being specific is key here. If you are going to understand the why questions you need to look at what is happening around you and what you are responding to. All thoughts feelings and behaviours are caused. They don't come from nowhere, even if you don't know where they originate.

I'll give you an example.

I wake up in the morning and I feel unhappy (emotion).
I turn over and turn off the alarm. Groan to myself and think "why should I get up today" (thought)
I call my boss/friend/other and cancel the meeting/appointment/activity (behaviour)
I then lay in bed (behaviour), feel lethargic and tired (sensation) and then judge myself for being lazy (thought)
I then feel shame, unhappiness and hopeless that things will get better (emotion)

Each of those steps has a behaviour (a thought, emotion or action is a behaviour). The question then is what can I do next time?

So I wake up in the morning and I feel unhappy (emotion)
I say to myself "I can cope", "this will pass" (restricting the thoughts) and I struggle out of bed to get teeth brushed (behaviour)
I eat breakfast even though I don't feel hungry (behaviour) and my blood sugars help me think
I plan my drive to the place I am going (thought)
I drive to the place and commit to being in the moment even though its painful (behaviour)


Does that make sense in breaking down what we do and how we go about breaking out of the cycle?
 
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WhySoSerious

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Also note secondary emotions - these occur when we have one emotion which leads to another... for example:

I am unhappy > I feel angry for being unhappy > I then feel guilt or shame for snapping at someone when feeling angry

This is a right mix of emotions that can stop us identifying the initial feeling. Just something to be aware of.
 
Memememememememe

Memememememememe

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Thank you, that's very well put but I don't know what's wrong with me, it's like every cell in my body aches in emotional pain 24/7 and nothing can make it stop and then stuff keeps happening that makes it worse
 
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WhySoSerious

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I want to go back to the question...

What is the actual emotion? Can you describe it? What does the pain look like to you or feel like?

I would strongly recommend mindfulness (youtube have some good starting points for practice).
If you are in high levels of emotion google DBT TIPP - those are instant skills for dealing with intense pain.

Good luck!
 
Memememememememe

Memememememememe

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Thank you for responding.

My pain feels black and gritty but the particles consist of millions of different kind of particles.

I am higly sensitive and I think I got BPD but I've never gotten a diagnosis for it because my doctor is more interested in other things in me but once there was a suspicion by them that I might got it.

I wish I got the diagnosis but I wish a lot of things with them, it's complicated.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Sometimes when I have been severely depressed my body aches all over...xo, j
 
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