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Whats Me and Whats The Bipolar?

L

linni_t_mm

Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2009
Messages
13
Location
Midlands UK
Hi, i'm new too this website.

I'm Bipolar type 2 and to be honest i'm struggling to come to terms with everything, I think my brain goes too fast. I get confused as to whats me and whats the bipolar, if that makes sense. Though my friends are trying to help I thought it might be easier to talk online, to people who feel the same way.I feel very isolated and a computer issue means i cant view chat rooms (something i used to do when i needed to talk to someone in the same position). I guess I'm having trouble coming to terms with this. I feel more like my personality is a symptom and i dont know who i really am.

linni
 
trombone_babe

trombone_babe

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 15, 2009
Messages
1,191
Location
Kent
Hi Linni, :welcome: to the forum. I don't suffer from bipolar myself but there are loads of people on here that do. We're a friendly lot and I hope you find the support you need. :)
 
L

linni_t_mm

Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2009
Messages
13
Location
Midlands UK
Thank you

Thanks,

I just need someone to talk to. to know how others with the same condition feel about it.

Linnix
 
thing fish

thing fish

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 1, 2009
Messages
150
Location
ohio
Hi, i'm new too this website.

I'm Bipolar type 2 and to be honest i'm struggling to come to terms with everything, I think my brain goes too fast. I get confused as to whats me and whats the bipolar, if that makes sense.
linni
makes sense to me. i am bipolar and i rapid cycle...
my brain is on full blast sometimes...i get paranoid and act strange...
then i get super depressed.

being bipolar has basically ruined my life. caused my marriage to fail and is ruining me...i hate it and wish there was a cure
 
L

linni_t_mm

Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2009
Messages
13
Location
Midlands UK
I know how you feel. I'm lucky to have my boyfriend stick by me, even though sometimes i'm totally vile to him. I just struggle when I'm on an up, because I'll get the thought stuck in my head that I'm not happy because I'm happy, I'll feel convinced its the bipolar. I feel like i dont know who i am anymore. I used to feel that i was a happy person who suffered with depression but since I got my new diagnoses I just feel like I have no idea who I am.

I hope that your problems with your wife can be resolved, I guess we just need to think over our condition and come to terms with it? but thats not as easy as it sounds is it? x
 
thing fish

thing fish

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 1, 2009
Messages
150
Location
ohio
I know how you feel. I'm lucky to have my boyfriend stick by me, even though sometimes i'm totally vile to him. I just struggle when I'm on an up, because I'll get the thought stuck in my head that I'm not happy because I'm happy, I'll feel convinced its the bipolar. I feel like i dont know who i am anymore. I used to feel that i was a happy person who suffered with depression but since I got my new diagnoses I just feel like I have no idea who I am.

I hope that your problems with your wife can be resolved, I guess we just need to think over our condition and come to terms with it? but thats not as easy as it sounds is it? x
you are lucky to have your bf stick by you.
my wife and i are not getting back together. we are not even on speaking terms ever since she got rid of my dog.
as soon as i was diagnosed and put on meds she bailed on me.

sometimes/most of the time i don't know who i am. i feel like my brain is at war with itself.
i just want to be rid of this illness but there is no cure in the foreseeable future. we're just gonna have to grind it out
 
L

linni_t_mm

Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2009
Messages
13
Location
Midlands UK
I know what you mean. I've always felt at war with myself. whether its feeling just having two contrasting feelings like daring yet neurotic or full blown self loathing its hard to argue with yourself so much, afterall its not like you can storm out of an argument in your head.

I'm so sorry your wife treated you that way. my ex fiancee left me over my depression a few years ago and its never something you get over fully, it influences your self esteem and relationships for a long time. I hope that you have as much luck as i have to find someone that understands.

I know that the end might seem a million miles away, and your right when you say that there is no cure, but i hold out hope that there is a way to cope. and to get on with life outside of the illness. I guess the trick is to enjoy every moment of "Normality" and hold on to it through the tough times. Remember that its a condition of ups and downs, I try to hold on to those rare moments where everythings just... even.

x
 
A

Ada888

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 6, 2009
Messages
64
Location
Kent
Hi Linni, I have bipolar too, had it for about 16 years. I haven't even had one relationship yet, I reckon guys can just sense it or something, ha ha. I think I know what you mean about not knowing where the bipolar ends and you begin, cos I feel like that too, like the bipolar is me and it owns me and that's all there is to me. But there is no cure for bipolar and I must keep plodding along with life.:rolleyes:
 
jax

jax

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Joined
Nov 23, 2008
Messages
868
Location
Belfast, N.Ireland
I have been having a tough time with this for some time. ATM I a brought down from a very big manic episode. I feel so dulled and slowed down. I know this is not me - but I also know that the me who can walk into any room and bring about laughter is not me either. I guess I am somewhere in between. It's very frustrating for me as I honestly don't know how I am.
Jacqui
 
L

linni_t_mm

Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2009
Messages
13
Location
Midlands UK
I have been having a tough time with this for some time. ATM I a brought down from a very big manic episode. I feel so dulled and slowed down. I know this is not me - but I also know that the me who can walk into any room and bring about laughter is not me either. I guess I am somewhere in between. It's very frustrating for me as I honestly don't know how I am.
Jacqui
I know what you mean, I know that when i sit and cry for hours, and moan or over talk things, that i'm being miserable and not myself. I know that I am bubbly and fun. but not AS bubbly and fun as i appear....

i guess i just dont like thinking that maybe i'm just someone who, underneath this disorder is really ordinary, dull and.. beige.
 
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