mostly promodol things i remember the first time i went schizo on cannabis kinda
everything changed in a instant my friends looked like demons and i started talking about some kind of "secret" or something my memorys hazy..then for the next couple of months everything changed i started talking differently i was like some manic cynic sudo interlectual i was pulling words outta my arse i didnt even know before fucking strange...this was my muse as i used to call it but all thats gone since my last two relapse just seem to be getting worse feel stupid if im honest.
It can also be the type of cananbis you smoke , some of the newer varieties (bin arounf a few years as opposed to a a few thousand) are not good for anyone , the dont contain the right mixed of active componates to help you stay steady whilst on it ...
Mine was when I was about 6, and being fed sleeping pills by my mother .. they did not always get me to sleep and I would have halucinasions ,... the first one I remember that realy terified me was seeing animals eyes , extra large in the darkness , staring at me and moving around ....
... strangely , even at that age I was more afraid of my mother and what she would do to me if I made a sound than what I saw ...
actually now i think about it i was pretty damn mad during childhood that kinda irrational fear and terror i kinda eased out of it as i got older more confident stronger, i mean i am diagnosed with ocd but i never opened up about it till i broke down in front of a friend after a drug binge and as fate would have it he happened to have ocd and he said what i was going through was ocd i surrpose at that point i shoulda sought help but i continued to self medicate with cannabis and then some ocd/psychosis hybrid occured and ive been getting worse since then...of course the ocd could have been premodal schizophrenia
but i had really bad compulsions like praying counting i think they call it pure O
who knows with this maddness thing i never suspected anything like psychosis
but like bob says when i started on this nutty skunk stuff thats got like 0% cbd which is the natural antipsychotic in cannabis and like 10-15% thc thats when things went "mad" and now im hearing voices i donno where the fuck i went wrong really...having said that ive started taking a niacin supplement seems to be doing some good...i know i come accross as sane but trust me im mad as a hatter.
Anxiety started when I was 11. I saw aliens and mosters when I was 12, circling around the ceiling of my room, and attacking my family. That was one of the scariest things. Then the moodswings started when I was 13, and the voices came when I was 14.
They still don't know for sure whats wrong, but they think it might be bipolar with psychotic features