What was your craziest manic delusion?

[ara13]

Looking to make some new friends who can relate to living the manic life. Lol!

I lived about six years of my life undiagnosed, and manic more often than not. It was definitely an interesting time.

My craziest manic delusion was that I was a sort of divine being with a mission from god, and that dead rockstars were telling me to do things through old records! It's super funny looking back on some of the things I used to believe, and sorting through was was true and what wasn't. I try to have a good attitude about it all and laugh when I can. Any good stories from others who have experienced mania?

 

[JessisMe]

Mine is similar: I thought I could channel dead rock stars and actually reached out to their rock star friends who are living with the messages from them. Of course they never replied. Another time I thought that houseplants represented my friends and that if I watered them my friends were doing well but if I didn’t water them it meant they were not going well. Many other things too...anything else you’d like to share? I have always wanted to know others experiences with manic delusion because it seems so strange....

 

[ara13]

Oh my god I can not believe that we had such a similar experience! I was obsessed with Marc Bolan and was convinced he was telling me through his songs which people I needed to talk to and be around, and that strangers were in love with me. The funny part was that it would constantly change, so Im sure my actions made NO sense to anyone around me, and I couldn't fully justify them. I had this theory that all musicians and poets and stuff that I liked had like, cosmic energy that when they died went out into the universe and was reborn into people I knew and me, and that I had to find the other people. That was my all time favorite delusion. It went on so long I totally went off the deep end, I used to wear certain outfits to attract people who I thought knew my secret, like I'd wear feather boas out during the day around Boston. Lol! Looking back on it I like to laugh because at the time I had no idea what bipolar or mania was so I was soooo convinced it was real. It's funny to me now. What's the good of life if you can't laugh at it.

Now I have darker delusions that are more typical, like people are following me ect. Those ones are less fun. What about you?

 

[JessisMe]

I thought everyone in my life corresponded to characters out of a Disney movie and that the way we related was playing out the movie or playing out the role. I thought that Dr. Dre and I were meant to work together with Planet Aid to save the world by bringing clothing to people in Africa and wrote him to tell him so. I thought that musicians I was a fan of were meant to be with me and compete for my affections even though they didn’t know me at all. I thought that certain books represented people I knew and the way that I positioned them in relation to each other meant something about their relationships and so on. So much more really. I didn’t know that they weren’t real either up until I looked back on them recently. I tried to start so many businesses when manic and considered myself a wildly successful business person when I was only selling second hand jewelry to area thrift shops for five dollars a piece.
It’s so good to be able to share these experiences with someone who can relate. The rock star thing was especially funny. It’s cool you can have such a great attitude about it. I feel mostly guilt and shame.

 

[ara13]

I lost most of my friends from that time, and the people I was around were NOT good people so I dont feel very guilty about how bad and weird I was during that time. It took me many years to make amends with my family and I'm still working on myself. I'm so interested in how so many people who have the same symptoms have the same delusions, it's so interesting.

I also thought I was a successful business person even though I only sold like one thing a month. I literally remember telling my friend "There's no way I can fail at this" Or "There's no way I won't succeed" when I came up with an idea for a new business, none of which succeeded because I couldn't focus on one thing at a time. Plus they weren't even good ideas. Something about manic confidence really lends to that attitude I think. I tried to start fashion businesses and still have so much stuff I made and never sold!

 

[FiddlyDigits]

I was convinced a coworker had bugged my office. I believed it enough to buy a bug detector. I thought another coworker was sending me secret threats encoded in how he decorated his desk. I thought people were following me when I was driving I'd go crazy ways to lose them.

I started selling random things around my house and buying a stupid amount of records insisting I was creating a life changing Ebay business.

It all ended when I was hospitalized and put on antipsychotics.

I had no idea how screwed up my thinking was until I looked back on it. Delusional thoughts are so real at the time. I can't tell the difference except I know some thoughts are odd at the time. Maybe next time that can be my clue.

 

[JessisMe]

I lost most of my friends from that time, and the people I was around were NOT good people so I dont feel very guilty about how bad and weird I was during that time. It took me many years to make amends with my family and I'm still working on myself. I'm so interested in how so many people who have the same symptoms have the same delusions, it's so interesting.

I also thought I was a successful business person even though I only sold like one thing a month. I literally remember telling my friend "There's no way I can fail at this" Or "There's no way I won't succeed" when I came up with an idea for a new business, none of which succeeded because I couldn't focus on one thing at a time. Plus they weren't even good ideas. Something about manic confidence really lends to that attitude I think. I tried to start fashion businesses and still have so much stuff I made and never sold!

I had all these ideas to start businesses,
looked into taking a business development seminar especially for women across two different manias and contacted the Small Business Association. I called real estate agents about places to
house my various businesses and at times started interviewing people for positions in my various businesses even though they were mostly pie in the sky, delusional in nature and I had no business plan or money to start the businesses with.

 

[JessisMe]

I was convinced a coworker had bugged my office. I believed it enough to buy a bug detector. I thought another coworker was sending me secret threats encoded in how he decorated his desk. I thought people were following me when I was driving I'd go crazy ways to lose them.

I started selling random things around my house and buying a stupid amount of records insisting I was creating a life changing Ebay business.

It all ended when I was hospitalized and put on antipsychotics.

I had no idea how screwed up my thinking was until I looked back on it. Delusional thoughts are so real at the time. I can't tell the difference except I know some thoughts are odd at the time. Maybe next time that can be my clue.

I didn’t understand my thoughts were delusional and there was anything wrong with me because they seemed so normal and real also. Some things I am looking back on and distinguishing as manic to this very day even though my various manias go back years now.

 

[ara13]

I had all these ideas to start businesses,
looked into taking a business development seminar especially for women across two different manias and contacted the Small Business Association. I called real estate agents about places to
house my various businesses and at times started interviewing people for positions in my various businesses even though they were mostly pie in the sky, delusional in nature and I had no business plan or money to start the businesses with.

I invested all the money I had (luckily not much) into wild business schemes I was sure would succeed and I still have all the studios stuff I bought. Lol. I’m glad someone else can relate!!

 

[manicmonday]

I'm still going on this one. I talk to a pagan god and he judges me for doing stuff like ordering pizzas or wearing comfy trousers instead of dressing up. I also thought there was a big conspiracy to get me into hospital, that my phone and laptop had been hacked, my house had been broken into, and that the doctors and nurses at the psych hospital were using Ericksonian techniques to put me into trances to make me keep up the delusions.

It's a wild time, lol.