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What should i tell my son?

J

jerprah

New member
Joined
Feb 10, 2015
Messages
2
Location
Australia
Hi there im a new member but I have a question.

My son is 21 years old and has had severe anxiety and ocd's for the last 10 years and there is one question he asked me that he cannot move on from because he feels trapped driving a car if he cant move on from it and accept it's silly.

Basically he has this ocd/compulsion fear that when he is driving he will intentionally rev the car's engine so people who are sitting in their houses or in their living rooms will turn their head and look at what is making the sound of the car coming down the street.

Now the ocd/compulsion/fear factor is he is wants to know if someone intentionally makes a sound with their car "hard acceleration" and people in their living rooms look out the window to see what it is, if he did that so the occupants of the house move their "buttocks to turn around and look" and he perceives it in a sexual way or does it in a sexual way for that reason then does that constitute a serious crime having been committed? as in what if the people in the house were 12 - 16 years old and he still intentionally did while thinking that so they move themselves/buttocks/any part of the body to find out where a certain sound is coming from.

Now I tried convincing him that it was the silliest thing I have ever heard in my entire life but I don't know how he's mind works. Wikipedia says "using a child for sexual gratification" is abuse etc. Would this be a crime? he doesn't want to drive because of fears of compulsions, ocd's and whatnot.

That definition Wikipedia mentioned would not fit the description of this question am I right? or does it?

Any help would be appreciated :) Thank you.
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
13,531
Location
The West Country
Ah that's a tricky one, isn't it?
You and I can clearly see that this certainly isn't a crime or abuse, but i'm sure to your son this fear is very real.
I agree that the thing in Wikipedia isn't really relevant in this hypothetical situation in your son's mind. His intention wouldn't be to look at children, it's his fear that a child may accidentally look at him if he's revving his car.

I'm really sorry I can't help you - i'm not sure what to suggest other than to keep reassuring him that his fears are precisely that - fears, unwanted thoughts, not reality, not who he is as a person etc.

Perhaps someone else may reply with some better suggestions. I wish you luck though and hope your son can overcome this anxiety.
 
J

jerprah

New member
Joined
Feb 10, 2015
Messages
2
Location
Australia
Thank you for the reply I know what you mean.

I feel so bad for him he must be going through living hell inside he's mind. As a parent it makes me hurt so, so much.

What if one day he gives up and just does this to get it out of he's system? He asked me would that make it all go away? because he would have no choice but to accept that he has to move on. What do you think?

):
 
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