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What I've learned from my diagnosis & how it has helped me

SicklyBloom

SicklyBloom

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 20, 2020
Messages
79
Location
USA
For the past couple of days, I've had several emotions. I've dealt with paranoia, depression, and worry all wrapped up in one. I've also been overwhelmed with fears regarding my health due to family history and the pandemic. I've realized I have a strong bond with my brother but lately haven't felt worthy of his love due to my mental disorder. I just don't want to burden my family because I know that they care but how long will it be until they no longer can? I'm afraid of wasting the rest of my life kissing frogs and getting tossed aside like I'm a buzzkill. I've had moments where I've lacked maturity and have looked like a total horse's behind because of it. I'm happy to say that I've kicked social media to the curb, so I've found a way to save myself the embarrassment. If I was on Facebook or Twitter, I'd be in the middle of a heated argument right now. It has been a journey mapping my emotions, triggers, and coping skills. Learning about my diagnosis has both helped and been a challenge for me. I'm still learning to cope with its spontaneity and have had times when I was completely tactless. One thing that I have yet to keep reminding myself it's only a part of me, not the entirety of me. I do have a tendency to overreact, but everyone has a tendency to overreact. I've been manipulative, but everyone has a tendency to be manipulative. I've had times where I've been tactless, but I always apologize though. I have to humanize my behavior to remember that it's normal and that tomorrow's a new day to try again. I've been getting better at understanding myself and creating boundaries when needed, but it could use improvement.

This year has been riddled with hardship, which has made coping harder to do. I'd like to thank the people who've taken their time to reach out to me. I've had second thoughts about sharing my thoughts in fear of humiliating myself but I've learned that what I have to say is important. Our emotions tend to be packaged up and ready to go in our minds but then splatter once they reach our mouths. Expressing emotions can be like pulling teeth but it's worth getting it out there. On the other hand, it's okay to rest on it. Not everything that feels needs to be said because that in itself can be tiresome. I've learned a lot from joining this forum because it has helped me make sense of my emotions. I just wanted to share my thoughts on how I've been doing and hopefully will share my experiences in the future. I'll keep learning as I go!
 
M

Mert

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 19, 2020
Messages
69
Location
San Diego
i am grateful for your post. i am new to the forum and not sure how much to share about my feelings. your post shows me it is okay to be honest and people will support you if you are honest. i feel lost today and i need things to fill up my day. i am home alone and on soc sec disability so i cant work. work is so important and i am grieving the loss of my job which i lost due to an episode with my mental health that landed me in the hospital for six days. i need things to keep busy and i have none. that is why i joined the forum, to talk to other people. please reply to this message so i know you read it,okay? thanks Mert :)
 
SicklyBloom

SicklyBloom

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 20, 2020
Messages
79
Location
USA
i am grateful for your post. i am new to the forum and not sure how much to share about my feelings. your post shows me it is okay to be honest and people will support you if you are honest. i feel lost today and i need things to fill up my day. i am home alone and on soc sec disability so i cant work. work is so important and i am grieving the loss of my job which i lost due to an episode with my mental health that landed me in the hospital for six days. i need things to keep busy and i have none. that is why i joined the forum, to talk to other people. please reply to this message so i know you read it,okay? thanks Mert :)
Hello! Thank you, I'm happy to help someone else. I hope your situation gets better, so don't fret! You're in my thoughts, so take it a day at a time. ☺
 
M

Mert

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 19, 2020
Messages
69
Location
San Diego
Thank you for your support. I am hoping things get better too. I appreciate you keeping me in your thoughts. If you pray ever at all, i would appreciate a quick prayer too.No worries on that one. Mert :)
 
B

Bilbo

Member
Joined
Jun 26, 2020
Messages
11
Location
Melrose
i am grateful for your post. i am new to the forum and not sure how much to share about my feelings. your post shows me it is okay to be honest and people will support you if you are honest. i feel lost today and i need things to fill up my day. i am home alone and on soc sec disability so i cant work. work is so important and i am grieving the loss of my job which i lost due to an episode with my mental health that landed me in the hospital for six days. i need things to keep busy and i have none. that is why i joined the forum, to talk to other people. please reply to this message so i know you read it,okay? thanks Mert :)
Hey Mert, I hear you. It’s so good the forum is here for us to relate to each other when we feel alone. I am sorry to hear about your struggles. Maybe simple changes today will help you. That’s what I am going to do, beginning with a short walk where I try and live in the moment and see and hear what is before me whether it’s the sky or a bird or if i’m lucky, a smiling face.
 
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