what happened to Mummy

Z

Zoe1

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when I was 17 my mother took her life
after 18 attempts at overdose
I was not living with her
I had gone to live with Dad
because I couldn't cope with her MH episodes

my brother remained living with her
and he found her doing the last attempt in her bedroom,
she pleaded with him not to call anyone
which caused him to hesitate

then he phoned an ambulance
when he realised she was not moving

he obviously ' carries guilt ' from the delay
while I carry guilt from not being there with him

both of us would have had ptsd at the time
which went untreated
and to this day I still dont know how ptsd is treated

I had an anorexic phase , a bad relationship and my MH started to slide
while my brother fell into drink and drugs

now the family expect me to be the chief carer for him
as they are all ' busy working '

:love: :loveshower: :loveshower: :loveshower: 🌠
 
J

Jules5

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Wow Zoe So sorry to hear this it must be devastating. I really really am sorry. I am a mommy and I thought about suicide before it was that dark in my life. I am so so sorry Zoe. You do not have to take care of your brother. But I would. Not out of guilt just responsibility for your loved one. I am not sure what kind of problems he may be causing you. Sometimes our lives are affected by what others actions do. Your mom taking her life has to be hard. I have severe mental problems and I am a mother. 4 kids. 1 still at home who has to put up with my drama. I can go to such extremes it is so very sad especially for everyone involved. But as a sick person I can not see through the darkness. It is just me fighting the demons alone. Zoe keep on talking and posting get it all out no one knows who you are but we all know what you are going through. Kinda of a nice forum I would say.
 
Z

Zoe1

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thankyou midnight, hugs back

I hope you are getting some sleep now

:hug5:
 
D

dewey

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Jan 16, 2019
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I just want to say I think you're super strong.
I'm sorry you're in this situation.
 
Z

Zoe1

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thankyou Dewey

I have heard that I'm strong before
I cant see it !
I dont feel strong if you know what I mean
I feel a bit of a wreckage at the moment !
 
D

dewey

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thankyou Dewey

I have heard that I'm strong before
I cant see it !
I dont feel strong if you know what I mean
I feel a bit of a wreckage at the moment !
I'm sorry :hug: :hug:
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Hi Zoe,
Not sure if you've heard of Cruise Get help | Cruse Bereavement Care they over help,advice and counselling to the bereaved.
I'm so sorry that happened to you, my grandad committed suicide so I do understand.
Please lean on us for support as well.
Take care
 
Z

Zoe1

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thankyou Mayflower

I do have a psychologist at the moment actually
ive got so many issues to attend to
its difficult to keep up with them !

the original issue
sparked off all sorts of other ones

posting on forums is brilliant for this
I'm coming along in leaps and bounds !

thankyou so much for being here !

:loveshower:
 
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