What does it feel like to NOT be Dissociated?

W

WeAllMustBeGhosts

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Oct 1, 2018
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#1
I have non-stop Depresonalization and derealization. It been like this for 10+ years now.

Lately I've been doing better mentally, but I've been unable to identify if I am dissociated or not. I feel a lot more emotions and things around me seems to have depth, but I still cannot recognize myself in the mirror and feel like I have a blank identity still. My name doesn't sound like my name still. It's been so long that I don't remember what its like to not be dissociated.

Can any one here try their best to explain what it feels like?
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

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#2
Hi there.That's a tough question to answer because it would take so long to do so.

Are you seeking help for your dissociation?
 
W

WeAllMustBeGhosts

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#3
I forgot to mention my dissociation is caused by Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and anxiety.

I am receiving treatment in the form of medicine. Our county Mental Health Services are under staffed and a very small percentage are properly trained. In the past 10 years I have only found one theripist that could properly help me, but she stopped doing 1 on 1 sessions. Her "classes" were a waste of time and gas money. I need 1 on 1 sessions. I can't talk through my trauma to a room full of people. My insurance will not cover a CBT or a private practice councelor/therapist. This is why I have made very little progress with my mental illness in the past 10 years.
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

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#4
I also have PTSD and I also used to struggle with a dissociative disorder with it.I recovered from the dissociative disorder with the help of my therapist(a psychologist).
Is there any way you can afford to pay out of pocket for one on one therapy?Or maybe find someone that will do pro bono work or charge you at a reduced fee?
 
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WeAllMustBeGhosts

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#5
I make $755 a month, so paying out of pocket is impossible for me. I'm going to call my insurance tomorrow and try to see if there is anything that they can help me with, like advice or referall, or if something has changed to where they will pay for a proper counselor or therapist.