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    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

What do you think about when you feel depressed?

M

mxm

Guest
I seem to focus on me, I stand around in a trance like a zombie and tell myself over and over and over what an idiot I am, that I've wasted my life and how I have let people down.

Is that typical of someone feeling depressed? or do think about other things too?
 
D

duncanw

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Mar 26, 2009
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29
Location
Newcastle, UK
I think your thoughts are very typical.

I find myself worrying and panicking about future events.
 
A

Apotheosis

Guest
I wish the end of the human race; & Armageddon onto the World; & the World wide collapse of societies. :D
 
unlucky

unlucky

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Personally, I tend to focus more on the people around me, but like yourself its how people are in relation to me. ie i'm a terrible mother, terrible wife, terrible daughter and everyone would be better off if I wasn't around - my mother would bring up my daughter better, my husband could find someone better, my mother wouldn't have the burden of having a mental disappointment daughter!! I think everyone has different thoughts.
 
invise

invise

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Dec 11, 2008
Messages
192
Location
Aberdeen
I think about being alone, I become obsessed by it. I dont feel like I want to talk to anyone, or even be in the same room. I always feel like their going to shout at me, or make me feel worse, or just ignore me. So i always think its best to be alone. I think a lot about running away and starting completely new, and that noone would probably even notice im gone. That im not really worth anything to anyonne.
 
unlucky

unlucky

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invise, you know thats not true, you're gf is still there - did you give her a big hug??
 
N

Nutter_09

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136
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Middlesex
Mxm, I feel the same. I am always analysing and worrying about things, from my work, friends, family to silly little things like I forgot to fold up the washing or stupind things that don't matter.
Always told im too sensitive and need to stop worrying about things (wasier said than done!!)
I feel like due to this, i dont seem to "fit in" with anyone or anything, as i cant stop it, and people dont understand.
 
invise

invise

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Emac, I know its not, but I still feel like that when I hit the dumps. Even the smallest argument or comment sets me off! I went to give her a hug but her friend was there and it wasnt the same :( got to hug her, but couldnt really talk properly. Ah well. Were spending the weekend together (shes sleeping just now, sssshhhhh), so feeling better just now :)
 
J

jamesdean

Guest
When I had my breakdown There were some litle walled gardens in the high street I used to want to bury myself under all the dirt, I used to visulize it every evening then I would want to run naked round one of the very busy roundabouts in town.

I have all sorts of phases, I used to think very strongly that I must of done something very bad in aprevious life.

These days I dont tend to blame I feel so let down by society.

Though this last six weeks my minds been so trapped I have hardly been able to think until just before this weekend all I could think about last weekend was ending it.

I'm not vey good at letting out anger.
 
A

Apotheosis

Guest
I have all sorts of phases, I used to think very strongly that I must of done something very bad in a previous life.
I personally believe the same thing. But I think we incarnate to experience all sides - the 'good' & the 'bad'; from both perspectives. Karma isn't a black & white tally of deeds & a case of 'paying the price' - I don't think so anyway.

There is another more interesting angle on it -
Take someone a bit heartless, mean, inconsiderate; someone not really bothered about the pain or upset they cause others. Would such a person have the capacity & sensitivity to experience certain 'karmic' influences? To process the things needed to come to a deeper appreciation of others & their effect on the World?

Now consider someone more sensitive, someone more aware of the feelings of others, more in tune with the subtleties of life. Is not this person going to have a much greater capacity to process certain things? A greater awareness of certain Karmic influences.

A hard life, & difficulties, the capacity to experience pain - & the ability to live through & grow through such states - is that not ultimately a good thing?

'Awakening by the Gate of Sorrow'

Contrary to popular misunderstanding the term "schizophrenia" does not refer to multiple personality syndrome. The Greek etymology of the word actually means "broken soul" or "broken heart".

-- Michael O'Callaghan
http://spiritualemergency.blogspot.com/2006/01/personal-account-spiritual-emergency.html

Overcome any bitterness because you were not up to
the magnitude of pain entrusted to you.
Like the mother of the world you are carrying
the pain of the world in your heart.

SUFI
We enter the gates of awakening carried by the same melodies, the same songs of joy and despair that first called us to the spirit. The ocean of life brings us waves of birth and death, joy and sorrow. For many, as at the beginning of our search, it is the painful truths of life that become our sacred gateway, that open us to the great heart of compassion. The blow of tragedy, the devastation of our losses may have begun our return to spirit. Now, in a deeper octave, this dimension of awakening opens our being to the shared pain of the world. To enter through this state is called "Awakening by the Gate of Sorrow."
 
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A

Apotheosis

Guest
"It is true that overcoming obstacles and difficulties accelerates spiritual progress. The most serious lifetime difficulties, like severe psychiatric illness or physical disability, may be signs of life progress, not regress. In my opinion, it is often the very strongest souls who have chosen to shoulder these burdens because they provide great opportunities for growth. If a lifetime can be likened to a year in school, then lifetimes such as these can be likened to a year in graduate school. This is probably why difficult lifetimes are more frequently recalled during regressions. The easier lifetimes, the "rest" periods, are usually not as significant."

Brian Weiss, MD - Through Time Into Healing
 
J

jamesdean

Guest
In real terms all ever I wanted to be was one of the crowd but its never been like that, Though I try not to believe it I am a special person I always have been but its isnt always easy to cope with the responsiabilty.

Thats very interseting whot you write about the greek etymology meaning a broken heart or soul.

That makes far greater sense to me.
 
bupanishad2012

bupanishad2012

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Joined
Mar 9, 2009
Messages
69
Location
Springfield, Missouri
Depressed thinking

Before my recent Zen Buddhist Satori experience, I worried about starving kids in Africa, that I would get leprosy, that I would die with no religion and decay in a box, etc., etc., etc. After Satori, these thing dropped away---except for the starving kids, of which there are many I have helped right here in my own locality. There IS a cure for depression, but it seems to be a combination of meds (I use Prozac) and self-involvement in LIFE! Go for it!

P.S. Oh, if you want to read a hilarious book on melancholy ("dark mood"), then read Robert Burton's "Anatomy of Melancholy." It's a classic, but well worth the read!
 
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Jo1760

Jo1760

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1,507
Location
London
I too can completely agree with mxm's thoughts,
When I have a particularly bad stage, i think of all the things i have done that have been wrong, even thoughts from years ago and the more i think and dwell on the the worse i make myself feel, It's just a horrible cycle that i get myself stuck in and it goes round and round my head.

I also have a horrid way of thinking about myself and how utterly useless I am, all the bad things about me, i think about who would really be bothered if i wasn't around anymore.
I do truely hate feeling like this but i cant seem to stop my mind racing about it one it starts.

X
 
bupanishad2012

bupanishad2012

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 9, 2009
Messages
69
Location
Springfield, Missouri
"Depressed thinking"

The first thing you have to do is stop the racing thoughts---only medicine can usually do this. Once relaxed, and you get plenty of sleep, you can deal with everthing better. Avoid Ambien, however, since people "sleepwalk," "sleepbuy," etc. on this drug. I took it for ten years---I know! Trazadone, an anti-depressant, has great sleeping powers, however. My neurologist put me on it for chronic pain and racing thoughts and seizures, etc. 100 mg at night, before bed, helps a lot. Once you can boil off the racing thoughts you can think again normally. Sometimes,however, a racing mind can be a symptom of genius and can help you solve many problems. Depends on how it affects you..Good luck!
 
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