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What are you thinking about right now? (mental health related)

losingme1989

losingme1989

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Joined
Sep 13, 2019
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12,819
Location
England
I'm thinking that I need to stop playing into the abusers mind games, it's nearly destroyed me.

No more of these games.
 
D

Dazed & Confused

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Oct 19, 2021
Messages
2,291
Location
Australia
My depression is because of my father but I don't understand why.
 
TooMuchPain

TooMuchPain

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Joined
Feb 6, 2019
Messages
1,504
Location
\_(ツ)_/
This morning was better than expected. I woke up mad but was able to make it better. I wouldn’t say I’m happy, but I’m not mad either. Feels like a win to me.
 
D

Dazed & Confused

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Oct 19, 2021
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Australia
Oh my God, my therapist is so bad. I don't even know what to say. I'm totally screwed.
 
D

Dazed & Confused

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Oct 19, 2021
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2,291
Location
Australia
@Tawny

I'm very sorry Tawny but I'm too afraid to talk about it. I'm afraid that it will make me worse and I'm very bad right now.
 
jajingna

jajingna

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Jul 31, 2020
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8,109
Location
Canada
I wonder what it means to be emotionally stable and mature. Plenty of grownups don't seem to have much of either emotional stability or maturity. It's appalling to see middle aged men still stuck in childhood reactions, but it seems there are things that are hard to get over, and some never do. Family is just a reminder of a lot of bad stuff. I wish it were all truly in the past, but that is wishful thinking only. Truth is it still matters, that long ago stuff.
 
Zero One

Zero One

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Joined
May 19, 2020
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5,668
Location
United States
I just came to say something and I felt and watched it just being wiped from my mind and I cannot remember--ok now I remember. I hope the prozasin will work well tonight. The kind of nightmares I have are like disturbances and I keep working on reasoning and mental problems through the night. When I wake up I feel like I have been through hell and often go back to sleep again and that is when the sleep is better. I wish it would stop. It's not easy being crazy but I am doing much better than I did before.

Today my mom asked me what the language is that I am speaking with the voices to laugh in scorn and they answered through me and told her it helps me to communicate with them because I think way faster than I answer. They told her I am really good. They sometimes orient themselves stop talk and I was so happy
 
ATARI

ATARI

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Joined
Sep 22, 2021
Messages
1,102
Location
south carolina
Hmm. . .

I Am Thinking Recovery Exist's In The Mind.
Which Lead's To The Body. Which Lead's To The Earth.
Which Lead's To The Sky. Which Lead's To End Of The Universe.

Which Lead's Back To The Mind.
Well, Something Like That I Think Sometime's.

I Wish I Had Cereal.
Cinnamon Toast Crunch To Be Exact!.

Remember To,

Stay Forever Thirsty Friend's. . .:coffee:
 
TooMuchPain

TooMuchPain

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Joined
Feb 6, 2019
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1,504
Location
\_(ツ)_/
Its Saturday and -21 outside. I need to work today outside with no heat all day. I used to be someone who could handle this. Then I fell down. I’m not happy working on my day off in the cold, but I will endure. I’m getting stronger.
 
I

IndigoCorkscrew

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Joined
Sep 2, 2021
Messages
382
Location
Uk
I wonder what it means to be emotionally stable and mature. Plenty of grownups don't seem to have much of either emotional stability or maturity. It's appalling to see middle aged men still stuck in childhood reactions, but it seems there are things that are hard to get over, and some never do. Family is just a reminder of a lot of bad stuff. I wish it were all truly in the past, but that is wishful thinking only. Truth is it still matters, that long ago stuff.
Perhaps childhood reactions are a result of the person being damaged at a critical developmental time and never moving on successfully. The 'long ago stuff' is actually the stuff that we wake up with as a shadow that follows us from room to room, day to day and person to person. When you turn round you can't see your shadow but it's there on your back.
 
jajingna

jajingna

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Jul 31, 2020
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8,109
Location
Canada
I've heard them referred to as "developmental arrests" like when bad stuff happened at a young age, and the response to it is a way to deal with it that might get the job done at the time, but then that becomes your go-to coping method, and when you get older it seems out of place. Like you're still using this old response as you haven't learned a better one. Sometimes you see this when someone who is not young loses his temper and throws a tantrum like a child. They have trouble managing their emotions which could be one of those developmental arrests, so they're still stuck with childish response despite the many years that have passed.
 
I

IndigoCorkscrew

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Joined
Sep 2, 2021
Messages
382
Location
Uk
I've heard them referred to as "developmental arrests" like when bad stuff happened at a young age, and the response to it is a way to deal with it that might get the job done at the time, but then that becomes your go-to coping method, and when you get older it seems out of place. Like you're still using this old response as you haven't learned a better one. Sometimes you see this when someone who is not young loses his temper and throws a tantrum like a child. They have trouble managing their emotions which could be one of those developmental arrests, so they're still stuck with childish response despite the many years that have passed.
I can relate to what you have said. In my case rather than losing my temper or getting loud and volatile I go very quiet and mentally shut down. My mental coping mechanisms have hardly developed since I was perhaps 12 years old. That was a very long time ago unfortunately. Back then I used to be psychologically bullied at school and never fought back. I was weak and simply hid, both emotionally and physically. I would hide at school or run away from school. I was like this all the way through comprehensive school.
My old school was demolished a few years ago. My maladaptive coping mechanism when I'm in a bad place now is to look at the picture of the building being knocked down. It's not a very healthy way of coping but I'm still trapped there as a 12 year old. That was nearly 40 years ago.
 
I

IndigoCorkscrew

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Joined
Sep 2, 2021
Messages
382
Location
Uk
Sometimes people can also be held back when their characters are so fragile they remain dominated or over influenced by others. I feel desperately uncomfortable around my elderly parents still, which sounds pathetic. Perhaps I will feel free finally when they are no longer around. I felt slightly free when my grandfather died in 1989. He abused me when I was small. In turn I wonder if my own father was mentally dominated by his father, my grandfather. I know that was the case with my mother and her own father, but he had also abused her. It seems awfully common.
 
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