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Was in crisis period... Now even worse through relationship breakup

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Bainster1

Member
Joined
Oct 5, 2018
Messages
6
Hello people, I'm Robert. Just found this forum tonight while working nightshift.
Suffered anxiety and depression most of my life but has progressively got worse over last few years although I cannot figure out why.

Along with this I suffer headaches, neck and back pain and recently found out I have a stomach condition called Ulcerative Colitis which I believe is similar to IBS. I only mention these as all these conditions together have over the years finally led me to a very, dangerous unstable frame of mind.
I mean dangerous to only myself by the way.

I have managed to continue working although I'm only just hanging on, but tonight I found out my wife says she loves me but that the love has changed and we should split.
This has absolutely rocked me as although I've not been pleasant to be around for a long time my wife and my step-daughter ( who I think of simply as my daughter) are my world and my motivation for going on.
Its been a long wait but I'm starting counselling next week.
I know there are no answers or magic wands to magically fix anything, and I apologise if I'm rattling on, but I'm sitting here in the dark in my work with my mind spinning into very dark places and I think i just need to write something.
Anyway, I'll have a look round the forum and I hope that in turn I'll be able to help someone.
Thank you for reading and take care everybody.
 
InfiniteRectangles

InfiniteRectangles

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 23, 2018
Messages
508
Location
Georgia, USA
I am so sorry you are going through this. I recently broke up with my boyfriend and even though we weren't married it was still difficult to leave him. I left because the relationship was unhealthy and he was abusive, but I still loved him, you know? And I also struggle with physical health problems that affect my mental health so I understand. It's really good that you are starting counseling. I think it will help you as long as you are open to it. Therapy has helped me a ton. Medication helps a little, but therapy is where I learn all the coping skills I need to deal with my illnesses. I do hope things get better for you. :hug1:
 
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Bainster1

Member
Joined
Oct 5, 2018
Messages
6
Hi again 😊😊, well done for doing what was best for you.
I don't have any personal experience of it but I've seen it before many times and have some kind of understanding of how hard it can be to love someone who doesn't treat you right, and how it takes strength to finally say enough is enough.

Yeah I've tried plenty meds too, planning on changing again actually although it may be futile but in my mind if I feel this bad then what I'm taking just isn't right if that makes sense.
I've never been open to counselling before if I'm honest, but the way i see it is that I've kept things bottled up for so long and where has that got me so yeah im definitely open to it now.
Just scared of getting my hopes up but nothing ventured nothing gained.
I also hope things get better for you, or if you're in a decent place just now then I hope it stays that way 😊👍.
Thank you for replying.
 
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Itisimpossible

Member
Joined
Oct 4, 2018
Messages
8
Robert, I’ve just joined too as we all feel better just talking to someone or venting our thoughts. Often it’s difficult to trust anyone with your thoughts as life still penalises is for having mental health issues (if you seek professional help you need to disclose it for life insurance etc) but here we can hopefully help each other. Stay as strong as you can, small steps.
 
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Bainster1

Member
Joined
Oct 5, 2018
Messages
6
That's very true, it's good to be among and talk to people who suffer also. Everybody needs to talk to somebody sometimes don't they.
I know about the health insurance thing too lol. Recently went away (terrible holiday but that's a different story) and when I was honest about my obsess the price sky - rocketed 🙄🙄.
Suppose that's just part and parcel of the insurance game.
Thanks for replying and nice to speak to you 😊
 
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Broken-hearted n depresse

Active member
Joined
Sep 28, 2018
Messages
37
Hi

I have Ulcerative Colitis and have had it for 16 years. My boyfriend broke up with me mid July due to his mental health/commitment issues. I suspect he may have met someone else but he has since denied that. There was no red flags before the break up but on the day of the break up I saw a text and 2 drawing photos he created. I approached him only a few weeks ago about it and he has since blocked me from his social media accounts. I actually regret asking him about it now and have no idea how to fix it, but my mental health went downhill as I constantly think about it. My ulcerative colitis has flared up and all the health problems like joint pain have flared up too.

My advice is to take care of your health. I am in such a bad way, health wise, that I want to give up sometimes.
 
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