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Unhelpful therapist!

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>.<

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 3, 2010
Messages
113
Location
UK
Argh my doctor does not help me at all! She's really nice but....just doesn't help me. I was diagnosed as bipolar by two doctors who witnessed me having an episode, where I'd just tried to kill myself and had to be hospitalised. My therapist I was already seeing in the community because I'd been having problems. When I was let out, she took off the diagnosis because she said she was unsure if it was bipolar or something else. She still says shes unsure.

She says im too inconsistent because "sometimes you say everything is okay, sometimes you say its great, and othertimes you say your life is awful". Yeah, isn't that symptomatic?

Anyway, shes only offering CBT and meds. I'm refusing to take meds atm, they make me feel absolutely awful, so I asked for other therapy as CBT doesn't do much for me, I've been having it for over a year to no avail :/. She said "well if you wont take the medication to fix the chemical imbalance, I feel like telling you to go away.". So then I said "your saying theres a chemical imbalance, what are you sayings wrong with me?" And she goes "I don't know"!!!!!!!!!!!

I asked for other therapies and at first she said no, but eventually shes said she's willing to try one other option.

When i tell her stuff she goes "its not THAT bad" and "its not like that" and she even changed my answers on a test I did :/

This is so annoying now, what can I do?! :scared:
 
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Blackholesun

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Apr 1, 2010
Messages
80
The problem is that these so called professionals do not have the illnesses they are trying to diagnose you with.

It's kinda like this to me... When my dad died people said (and I was 8 and so were they)

"There there, I understand"

But I just felt like saying "Oh? has your dad died then? in which case no, you don't fucking understand so please do not patronise me"

Now I will admit one thing. I'm a ratty moody wanker. I know this. Infact, I know all of the bad stuff about myself because I had to face all of those demons before I would go to a shrink and seek help in 2004. But it just gets on my tits that people in these jobs have read books, yet don't even understand what it is they're helping you with.

I am one of these 'hands on' types of people who truly feels that you cannot possibly begin to understand anything unless you have witnessed it yourself. For example, the Jews. How can any one say they understand how that must have been when they weren't being gassed and tortured? I mean shit, surely that's something you would really need to experience to understand?

Not that you should experience it, but yeah, your idea of what that would be like and the actual reality of it are a million miles apart.

I mean seriously, who is guilty of saying I understand when you don't?

All of my friends are mental. They suffer with depression, anxiety and OCD disorders. Basically any one 'normal' would see me grinding my teeth and making stupid noises and run a mile. Why? they simply don't understand. And I don't expect them to, they're not mentally ill.

If I can just find one doctor here in the UK even half as competent as the ones in the USA I will be in good hands. So far I am wondering who is the mental one.
 
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Blackholesun

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Apr 1, 2010
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80
When i tell her stuff she goes "its not THAT bad" and "its not like that" and she even changed my answers on a test I did :/
I had a massive bout of mania and panic a few weeks back and very quickly became suicidal. No one was here at the time as they were away for a weekend (my family) and I was left alone. It was terrifying.

My aunt (bless her, she's very sweet) said

"well when you feel like that why don't you just go for a walk?"

As I said above, they just don't understand. And unless they have seen life through your eyes and experienced the feelings you have it's hard expecting them to tbh.
 
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>.<

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 3, 2010
Messages
113
Location
UK
YES YES YES YES YES! No one understands unless they are dealing with it themselves! Urgh it's ridiculous tbh! the so called mental health services do not help! I feel really let down by them I've been seeing someone since I was 12, had 2 hospitalizations and yet NO ONES HELPED ME! Wtf do you have to do to get the right kind of help around here?!

I've made the decision now that the only person who can help me is me. I'm the only one who knows EXACTLY what im going through at that time, so I'm going to get some self help books and see if that helps me.

It does make me angry though, my problems weren't as bad as they are now when I started seeing someone. It was more mild social anxiety and mild depression before. Now I have severe generalized anxiety, OCD, bipolar (most probably) and severe phobias. If they'd have helped me before, it might not have got this bad :(
 
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Blackholesun

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Apr 1, 2010
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80
I have rapid cycling Bipolar with mild autism. So I'm pretty much all kinds of fucked up. However without sounding arrogant I am a genius.

Any way, here's what I got in the USA.

Week one I went to the docs and said that I wasn't right and hadn't been for a long time. He referred me to a shrink. The next day.

After going in for an hour a day for a week every single day I was started on a low dose of Zoloft. I continued to go every day so that not only could they asess my moods but to also make sure I was suffering no adverse effects of the Zoloft.

After three months of this and basically sort of living with me for that long they made the decision that I was Bipolar and I rapid cycled.

Within a week they had seen me -

Manic as shit, talking uncontrollably and gnashing my teeth.

Emotional, angry and choking back tears.

Suicidal.

Over here? I'm lucky to get one appointment every three months. At this rate I'll be about 80 by the time they finally diagnose me.
 
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>.<

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Joined
Mar 3, 2010
Messages
113
Location
UK
Bloody Hell! :scared: Thats amazing service! I get an apointment every week now, (although I didn't before), because I'm under 18 so our services are *slightly* better, not much though! I asked for more frequent appointments, and I was told I wouldn't get them unless I was an inpatient.

Anyway, because of the infrequency of appointments before, I had a breakdown and ended up getting hospitalised twice for 2 months overall. While in hospital, I saw a therapist twice. TWICE. Did jack shit.

Anyone from America that gets that kind of service should count themselves lucky, I'd love to get that kind of thing! It would help so much.
 
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Blackholesun

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Apr 1, 2010
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80
It costs. $400 a month for health insurance and a $15 co pay every time you go. And don't forget the $20 co pay on prescriptions.

Without sounding rude do you have any idea how much an anti depressant actually costs at a pharmaceutical level?

Depending on the type and brand some cost upward of $400 a month.

This is basically why they really really don't want to give me Sertraline. Not because it's shit and doesn't work but because being an American drug and licensed and patented by Pfizer. As such there's a hefty royalty even on the clones.

I had chest pains in the USA once. I was rushed in by ambulance and kept over night. I had benefits but I was sent a reciept. $18,000.

As much as I would love to moan about the NHS it is rather marvellous. Our mental health services are what need hitting with a shit covered stick.
 
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>.<

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 3, 2010
Messages
113
Location
UK
The NHS is a great service to have, I agree it's the mental health services that fail. It's a sorry state of affairs that it's more about money than the health and wellbeing of the patient though.

Mental Health always seems to come second place compared to other things. You always hear about new genetic breakthroughs for cancer, or new drugs to for heart disease, but you never hear something like "new breakthrough in treating patients with mood disorders.". It's annoying, becase MH shouldn't be any less important than physical health.
 
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Blackholesun

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Apr 1, 2010
Messages
80
The NHS is a great service to have, I agree it's the mental health services that fail. It's a sorry state of affairs that it's more about money than the health and wellbeing of the patient though.

Mental Health always seems to come second place compared to other things. You always hear about new genetic breakthroughs for cancer, or new drugs to for heart disease, but you never hear something like "new breakthrough in treating patients with mood disorders.". It's annoying, becase MH shouldn't be any less important than physical health.
But as soon as one of us fucks up it's all over the news.

Crazy really.
 
jax

jax

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Joined
Nov 23, 2008
Messages
868
Location
Belfast, N.Ireland
I lived in the States for 6 years - the system is totally different there. I started off seeing a psychologist. Then when he realized I needed more help - I got an appointment with my psychiatrist within days. My psychiatrist saw me almost every day for 50 minutes at a time. She was my therapist as well as my Pdoc. She was very good to me. She would give me samples of my medicine whenever she had them. When she ran out, I would have to buy them at full-price as my insurance didn't cover my medicines. It was a nightmare as medicines ar so expensive. My pdoc wrote off what my insurance didn't pay her for my therapy sessions. This was amazingly kind of her. I think she liked me because of my Irish accent - most Americans like the accent. I saw my pdoc for 6 years - so she was out a lot of money for my sessions. I was very fortunate to have had the level of support for her.

Hospitals in the states are a complete nightmare too to pay for. The very syringe you have blood taken out with is added to the bill. I was hospitalized 7 times in the states and the bills were extortionate - even for only a few weeks.

Appointments here with my pdoc are few and far between. I see my pdoc about every 6 weeks. When I arrived home from the states - it was like culture shock - seeing a pdoc every 6 weeks!! The systems here and the States are very different - takes a bit of getting used to.
Jacqui
 
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Blackholesun

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Apr 1, 2010
Messages
80
I got free doggy bags too. And the great part was if I heard good things about an AD I would simply ask for a sample and I would always get them.

I tell you what's odd. The best thing I have ever taken that's helped me more than anything for my bipolar is Darvocet. It's a seriously heavy painkiller similar to Percoset and Oxy Contin (getting progressively stronger too !).

Oddly it relaxed the shit out of me and I absolutely loved them. I was taking them for my back, but I've never felt so well and relaxed in my life. Easy to see how actors get addicted to them though :D
 
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