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Unhappy? rant.

Anime-Alchemy

Anime-Alchemy

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Ok, so I went to a church get together with my mum (she's really into Christianity) for the second time. It was quite long >_< but also I didn't want to be there. I lied to my mum afterwards as we went out of the gathering that I was get anxiety. I was just trying to find a way to get out of it. You might be thinking that why don't I just be straight with her but I don't know. Anyways a combination of me getting mad within myself and my brain. So now I had thoughts of leaving my mum.
Also at the end of the gathering, some people met me, one person wanted me to do a course, the same person I took her number down, another person also got my number. I'm not religious >_< it's my thing.

Anyways just want to get that off my shoulders. I may leave my mum. I also kept thinking of something that even hasn't happened and yet I was getting mad within myself. The day dream/thought was my older brother, meeting him again for a long while and then I think him trying to look out for me but I take it as him treating me as a little bit as a child. Even now I think what I wrote is about my brother in the previous sentence is a lie or not, I don't know. I then take it as people view me a weak, etc and then have a falling out. Which also led to thoughts about family. I've said it before on this forum, along the lines of, family to me is not about blood and physical relations. It's about bonds and connections regardless of flesh and blood.

Anyways rant over with now.
 
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Helena1

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how is it at your mum's other than the church thing. i thought you moved in with her for a while because you were/ are in crisis, so maybe you are safer being there for the moment. you could always tell her you dont want to go to church and then move out if she is really funny about it but she may well be fine about it.
have you got somewhere else to stay if you do move out?
 
Anime-Alchemy

Anime-Alchemy

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Hello Helena1, things are ok with my mum. She believes I guess that the reason for my mental health ( I told her that i had anxiety, which i do.) is because of not eating right, not socializing and maybe some other things. Um I know she's trying to help, etc. Also I think she believes me going to the church gathering will help me I guess? or not I dont' know, most likely she thinks it will help.
Um Yeah this evening I will say about not wanting to go to church. If things get a bit funny then fair enough. As for leaving, I don't really have any other place to go, so I will maybe go to the council in Oxford or go somewhere else in the country. I'll be fine sis ^^
 
chazxxx

chazxxx

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Duno what to say to help here hun. Id have to be forced into church kicking an screaming. :(
Religion is a tricky thing so i can understand you not wanting to tell her its not your thing. But perhaps you just approach it with her that going to the church isnt whats best for you at the moment - rather than your not religous?

What do you mean by leaving your mum? Leaving oxford?

:hug5:

Xx

-Ha sorry pretty much said the same thing!
 
Anime-Alchemy

Anime-Alchemy

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Hello sis ^^ Hope your well. Um I think I will say that i'm not religious and not interested in going to church. I'm gonna be straight up honest. I very much doubt it will cause a falling out but if by the very very slim chance something does happen then i will leave. Yeah I could physically leave my mum and the house, and either stay somewhere else in Oxford or go to another city. Most likely go to Lancashire. Don't worry about me sis ^^ i'm a survivor.
 
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