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trying to leave my PTSD in the mountains

Unhinged

Unhinged

Active member
Joined
Jan 27, 2010
Messages
31
Location
Tennessee
(i apologize now for this random rant of a thread)
hi again, i haven't posted here in some time. i got diagnosed with PTSD a few months back and have been in a nightmare rollercoaster of meds and doc mistakes. couple trips to the ER and they haven't been letting me work. (i'm a firefighter and an emt on the ambulance.)
not sure if this is the best treatment option but i've decided to move, i resigned from work today. where i live is really rural so there aren't many healthcare options available. and when the doc talked about sending me to the hospital i talked with my mom and some friends and they're moving me to another state, and to a city. i'll be with great friends (don't have many left here) and have access to more healthcare.
i'm just posting this i guess because i'm scared about moving and trying to start all over again. i decided to take a break from emergency work for awhile and hope i can find some work with animals. i'm just scared so i needed to tell someone, anyone. my fire dept is being really great and doing what they can to help me move, but my ems job pretty much just waved goodbye :(
i cried so hard when i handed in my gear, i'm really going to miss the job but i know i can't get well here.
a quick breakdown of whats happened just this month is i was on zoloft and xanax, but the xanax was like crack and wasn't working at all so my GP took me off the xanax and i ended up in the ER the next night with a massive panic attack. they took me off the zoloft and put me on ativan, then my GP added lexapro. that just seemed to build and build until i was super suicidal and p-doc just made me stop the lexapro cold turkey last week. doubled my ativan and might try wellbutrin next week.
guess my ? is, does anyone know if wellbutrin works on PTSD? since i can't handle the SSRIs.
 
P

philmriv

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 30, 2009
Messages
52
Location
Hawaii
MediTaTion can help PTSD a lot.

Look up zen-type meditations, especially any of these-- 'Mindfulness Meditation', 'Vipassana Meditation' or 'Insight Meditations'.

Each of these meditation types is thousands of years old--

And there are many books out there on each type.

They all are very similar, and can help PTSD type symptoms.

The other thing is to learn to accept your intrusive feelings and thoughts more deeply.

If you can accept them (especially the most difficult feelings) on a very deep level, they will dissolve / pass more easily.

(Easier said than done though, it takes a lot of gentle practice and persistence). But it really can help!

Very best wishes during this difficult time.
 
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Unhinged

Unhinged

Active member
Joined
Jan 27, 2010
Messages
31
Location
Tennessee
thanks for the idea, i'm just getting set up again on-line at the new house.
i will give it a shot.
 
Unhinged

Unhinged

Active member
Joined
Jan 27, 2010
Messages
31
Location
Tennessee
Once again it has been awhile since i've been on this site.

I'm pretty well settled in here at the new house, as much as i can be atleast. Still unable to get hooked up with a doc since I've gotten to the point that i can't even go to the store without having an episode let alone find somewhere to work. I got invited to start group therapy next week and am nervous but kinda looking forward to it as well.

Been having some good days and more often bad ones. Don't really sleep anymore. So i spend my time drawing, painting, and remodeling the house. Earn my keep by maintaing the place, doing dishes and laundry that sort of thing.

I moved out here to be with a long time best friend (6 years) and we got engaged 2 months ago, wedding is set for October. I'm really happy about it, i really do love him, but all the stress of planning a wedding isn't helping at all. No one seems to understand that when i say i just want a small simple ceremony, that really is all i want.

Even tho my mom isn't here to help me and comfort me like whe was when i lived in the mountains i still think this was the better choice. there was nothing for me there. Here i think i have a chance to get this under control, well, at least i'm going to put up a fight now.
 
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