• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

Trouble with trying to help my sis

Diesel1988

Diesel1988

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 6, 2015
Messages
50
Today, my sister was not acting like herself, she seemed distant, and she got aggravated easily, I think she is using again. I have a problem with this because, she had come so far in her life, and I do not want to see or watch her fall again. I seen her at her worst, when she was using and suicidal, it made me feel like there was no way to help her. I want her to have the best in life, like me, but i had to fight, tooth and f***** nail to get it. I dont want her to have such a difficult time in life, because she has already been through too much. But i also know if i give it to her on a platter she will not be able to provide for herself.
I find that I want to step in and help her in anyway, i always do. i also want her to get help before she loses everything, and i am confused about how to go about talking to her about her problems. i think the straight forward approach is too harsh for her, and maybe the indirect approach would be better.
 
M

my-straightjacket-please

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 13, 2013
Messages
559
Location
im gone take care email if you want its in my prof
you cant thers nothing you can do a person has to want change and help or your just a annoying person to avoid

all we can do for family and friends is be there when they fall or are ready

ever try to move a goat or donkey you get kicked tired wore out sore and still didnt get anywhere

like people it didnt want to and wont until its dam good and ready

sorry but the harsh truth
 
music91

music91

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 28, 2015
Messages
84
Hi Diesel1988,looks to me your very much caring sister and not everyone does have ,your sisters very lucky to have you there for her,what ever you are worried about to talk to your sister about before she might lose everything,you need to think will it make your sisters feel worst in away if you say what may need to said to her but 2 options you could say what you think needs to or wait and see if your sister changes whatever you are worried about that may make your sisters lose everything. and to other person said about goat donkey yea with a kick they might but can give a push forward and a Step to better path.
 
music91

music91

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 28, 2015
Messages
84
I do here ya (My-straightjack-please) to said also and i just wanted to add that with a push to Sept to better path and not giving in could help also.
 
Diesel1988

Diesel1988

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 6, 2015
Messages
50
true and i do know this she is very difficult some times, and all I can do is be there for my big sis, and hope and pray for the best for her, I love her so much, and I see myself as her protector still, I just want to protect her from the bad things in her life, but if i shelter her, she won't gain that experience of growing, losing, accomplishing, Its just she falls so hard and its so difficult to pick her back up...Love you big sis..
 
K

Kristen800

Member
Joined
Mar 25, 2015
Messages
12
Location
not in this universe!
You sound very compassionate. Try to be patient and keep on gently helping her. You're a good person and you're trying to help, that's very clear. It's hard to help depressed people. Keep up the hard work.
 
P

Penguin09

New member
Joined
Apr 7, 2015
Messages
1
you cant thers nothing you can do a person has to want change and help or your just a annoying person to avoid

all we can do for family and friends is be there when they fall or are ready

ever try to move a goat or donkey you get kicked tired wore out sore and still didnt get anywhere

like people it didnt want to and wont until its dam good and ready

sorry but the harsh truth
Actually with goats you can use sugar oats to guide them wherever you want them to go, the same is true for humans. Just find something they want and offer it to them to change.

For instance if the Diesel's sister wanted Xbox games you could offer a cheap $15 game to keep them in the house and occupied while she's using and not on the streets doing whatever to get a hit. If she stops using you could buy her a World of Warcraft subscription and use it to occupy her time so she doesn't get bored.

It may cost you $100 to $200 dollars worth of video games until she finally gives up her addiction, but the question is what is she worth to you?

The idea is to offer incentives for her to stop using, if she's not into videogames you could try chocolate or coffee. Or even DVDs as long as she's at home and not roaming the streets is beneficial. Also try to get her away from her drug addict "friends".
 
Top