triggered by others' eating disorder stories

[cara1077]

This girl I kinda know posted her entire eating disorder treatment story in a facebook group (the group is unrelated to eating disorders) and it really upset and triggered me. I'm not worried about her or anything, she has a good support team and people looking out for her now. I know eating disorders are really competitive which is probably why her posting this whole long story upset me so much. I keep thinking about it and obsessing over it. It feels like my ED (that I am just now starting to come to terms with and working towards recovery) is less valid or less important because I haven't shared so publicly that I have one. I also haven't gone inpatient or to a treatment center (I'm trying really hard to stay out of it actually) but on the flip side, I also feel really invalid because I have never gone inpatient. Those seem contradictory, probably just my disorder talking. Anyway, I just sound so selfish and disordered but I don't know how to stop obsessing over this girls story and how it invalidated my own struggles and experiences. any advice or anyone else relate or know why im feeling this way?

 

[Mario82]

Hey, I understand you feeling invalidated because she posted her story, but you really don't have to. Just because you haven't been as open yet and are still in the acceptance stage doesn't mean that your plight is any less important than hers.

I am a male who had an eating disorder. I was afraid of choking and dropped to a very low weight. Now I am a bit overweight actually but I feel healthier mostly. So you can beat it and it won't always control you.

 

[katwomyn3]

You have the right to distance yourself from such things, right now you are not in the right place to be around people who trigger you. You will probably develop fortitude to such things. But, it is your eating disorder feeding into you that you are not committing enough to it. It is not right. You need to learn to find a way to disassociate yourself from this voice who is telling you that this person's story is not as bad as yours. You are right there is a competitiveness to eating disorders, since there has been a culture glorifying it for long. Regardless, of what has happened to this person you described, your ED is happening to YOU. It is affecting YOU and YOUR LIFE, it is marring your quality of the life you deserve to have. You deserve so many other things in your life that isn't affected by your food intake and your weight. Maybe instead of finding a competitive relationship to this girls story, try finding something you can identify with so you dont feel so alone with your ED. Because that it was your ED wants, to isolate you and make you completely dependent on it. Try to find the strength of your identity and just strength overall to say fuck you no! It's good to be angry, just don't be angry at yourself.