• Hi. It’s great to see you. Welcome!

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life. Amongst our membership there is a wealth of expertise that has been developed through having to deal with mental health issues.

    We are an actively moderated forum with a team of experienced moderators. We also have a specialist safety team that works extra hard to keep the forum safe for visitors and members.

    Register now to access many more features and forums!

Transference ? feels like a mess now. Wish I had kept my mouth shut!

R

ranger

Guest
From how you explain it you do feel very uncomfortable with him. Therapy is u comfortable. It is not easy. I honestly don't know but obviously it is very natural in many respects to be attracted to him in that way considering how your relationship is.

Do you feel maybe it might be better if either you or both you and your husband considered relationship counselling. I don't know if this is possible for you both. Obviously I have no idea as to how things are in general.

I am getting the feeling the therapist might be trying to explore this for you as opposed to stating maybe what you think.

I am sorry. I hope I haven't said anything out of place. I am just considering if this might be what is happening. I don't know you so obviously I don't know what works cor you but if this is too difficult talking to a male counsellor particularly one you fancy do you think it maybe easier chatting to a female counsellor. Hope I haven't upset you by saying this.

Ranger
 
M

michelle11

Member
Joined
Feb 22, 2013
Messages
13
No you haven't offended me it is good to know what other people think could be going on. He knows my relationship is not so good at home. But I just muddle on through it. Maybe he is just exploring what is happening although I've told him everything. I will see how next session goes. Thanks for all your advice it really helps.
 
R

ranger

Guest
I had a lot of therapy myself. But I did find chatting on here as well helped me reinforce what I had sort of learnt in therapy but just needed reinforcing.

You will get a lot of people on here from all sorts of backgrounds with all sorts of experiences. So there will be lots of viewpoints but I hope being on here can help you too.

Good luck with the next session. Hope it gradually helps you.

My therapist said to me that therapy is like unravelling all the layers of an onion.ie it happens bit by bit ie it takes a while to get to the core. It doesn't happen overnight but maybe hopefully it may help you. I hope so.

Ranger.
 
M

michelle11

Member
Joined
Feb 22, 2013
Messages
13
I've never cried before so don't know whats wrong with me. Maybe he thinks I'm strange like he can't break me ?
 
M

MissD

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 21, 2013
Messages
93
Personally transference in my opinion is questionable, how about it being a simple case of just being human? Therapy is unnatural but a bond between two people is natural.
 
R

rvalencia72

Member
Joined
Dec 21, 2018
Messages
8
my therapist keep asking me what feelings I have towards him. I always say I don't know or nothing. Anyway I have liked him since our first meeting he is very attractive gorgeous eyes and lips. I have tried to keep my feelings a secret and make sure my body langauge doesn't give my feelings away. I have tried to stop myself feeling anything for him I know it's wrong. I just feel a connection between us especially when he stares at me I just feel something.

Anyway today he asked me and it took a while but i ended up telling him I thought he was hot and attractive. He was fine about it and he said he felt something . He said it was all ok provided we didn't act on anything. It was ok to explore the feelings. I wish I hadn't said anything. I told him that I didn't want him to feel awkward and he said I don't feel awkward I feel something ?

I told him my fears about therapy ending because of the situation and he promised it wouldn't he thanked me for being honest.

I feel really stupid he did talk about transference but I don't really know much about it.

Anyway he is stuck in my head now it's so annoying. Wish I had kept my big mouth shut. He said it would be useful, im wondering how that can be. Wrestling with my feeling for him is driving me nuts. Being bipolar I will probably not feel anything for him next week as my feelings can turn off and on a bit.
 
Top