Train suicide

[Micky]

I'm hurting SO BAD!

I want to run infront of a train in the next week... not sure what day yet...

Please can someone message me... talk me through this...


REALLL LONELY

 

[*Sapphire*]

Hi Micky.

Do you know what is causing you to feel like this?
How have you been the last few weeks?

Try not to do anything impulsive, please keep yourself safe.

 

[keepsafe]

I am so sorry you are feeling so desperate, I understand completely as one of my things was to go on the railway lines, please consider getting the help you need now. Do you have a c.p.n or are you involved with the local community health team? Please think about presenting at A & E so there will be someone to help you - when things get this bad you need help straight away to keep yourself safe. You really should think about the help you need, please don;t do anything to hurt yourself.

KS

 

[scarred4life]

i wish i could help you, but you need someone there with you to help you out through ur dark patch. being alone is the worst ever. 1 is the loneliest number.

 

[KP1]

Hi Mickey
It is the illness that's causing this feeling. You are a good and worthwhile person. Keep posting on this forum,ring samaritians go to a and e or ring your out of hours GP service if you are in the UK.
I'm thinking of you.
KP

 

[*Sapphire*]

Looking at this from another angle Micky, I know of two people, personally that jumped in front of a train. One lost both her legs, and ended up physically severly damaged to the point that she was wheelchair bound for the rest of her life.

The other, a pretty girl, ended up becoming badly disfigured.

Both said they regretted it. That it was an impulsive act and not really what they wanted to do although they thought it was at the time. Both have to live with that for the rest of their lives.

I know it is hard to think that far ahead, I know you believe you will succeed. But nothing is guaranteed. And who said that death is better than life anyway?

I know you are feeling desperate, I am so sorry you feel that way. I have been there myself, I still am some days. But I hold on to the fact that thoughts and emotions can and do change, they are transient, they are not permanent, they will pass. You have had a rough ride of it lately, it is all very understandable.

Try to hold on, people are offering their support to you here. You are not alone here.

 

[iffybob]

Hi

Micky I tried to PM you, the system will not allow me to.

If you have not blocked me, then I think your Private Message Box is full, and you need to empty it before anyone can PM you.

I do want to try and help you........

Take care ...... boB.....

 

[Kate31]

HUGS

I've felt like this too...but i promise you that these feelings will get easier to deal with - it's the depression making you want to stop living - it's an illness that can be treated. Last year after writing a suicide note i got help and spent 3 months in hospital but today, i am thankful that i am alive.

Is there anyone you trust who you can talk to? If you went to A&E you could see the duty Psychiatrist? Don't go through this alone - the depression makes you think that you'd be better off dead but that same depression can be treated and you can enjoy things again - BIg HUGS x

 

[starfish]

dolores

i have had thoughts about jumping in front of a moving train.i thought about the driver and how he or she would feel about that happening. i notice that you tried to take your life several weeks ago. depression is just about one of the worst illness to suffer from. it is an illness, its not the real you, the real you is a happy contented person. try and get some help from the doctors asap. you deserve to be well.

 

[scarred4life]

i've stood in front of oncoming trains more than once, but i just did it for kicks.

u have to bear in mind what sapphire said-it's not 100% certain u will be a gonner...and then life can get even worse...

don't do it...

 

[*Sapphire*]

i have had thoughts about jumping in front of a moving train.i thought about the driver and how he or she would feel about that happening. i notice that you tried to take your life several weeks ago. depression is just about one of the worst illness to suffer from. it is an illness, its not the real you, the real you is a happy contented person. try and get some help from the doctors asap. you deserve to be well.

I met a man in a group I went to once. A grown man with a wife and son. He revealed that he was a lorry driver and when he was driving one day on the motorway a lady ran in front of his lorry as an act of suicide. She was immediately killed.

This man is now a broken man. He couldn't go back to work, he never got over it. His full life suddenly became empty, he became scared of going into any form of transport again. He could not even go out with his young son any more. His son lost the dad he had before, his wife lost the husband she knew. He had severe PTSD and anxiety and depression as a result.

Suicide effects far more people than you can ever imagine....and I need to remember that too.

 

[JETBOY]

my first train suicide attempt /poss trigger

what makes us think death would be a realise?

i was happy and drunk ,so i lay down ,the rail was cold but the drink kept me warm ,i knew i would hear the train coming ,ehco,ing through the rails. I was,nt afraid ,i could see all the lights in the town twinkling in the cool darkness ,i could hear the clatter of train wheels in the distance ,would this be it ,the cold steel racing towards me ,i wouldent feel anything it would be so quick ,then finally i would be seperated from that thing that gave me so much pain ,would my eyes stay open after my head had left my body ,stareing at my lifeless torso,would i have time to think before my brain died ,there you go my dark visitor you cant hurt me now ,then the lights would fade ,were would i go what would i be ,forever happy and drunk ,or just that scruffy punk who killed himself . The clatter faded must have been going the other way ,closed my eyes i was tired i felt at ease i didnt want to go home it was a place i did,nt know anymore ,I was woken by footsteps on the gravel ,a small figure loomed towards me ,what you doing man ,c,mon ,im dragged up ,c,mon wake up man ,what the hell guy cmon move your legs buddy c,mon .I could see it was a guy i had met briefly during the gig ,he lived nearby and he took me to his house ,he never ask me what i was doing ,i think he thought i was just drunk and had stumbeld there ,his name was ziggy and we became great friends ,he save my life without ever knowing , a few years later he was involved in a bad car crash and is now badly disfigured, how ironic ,at this time i would have been happy to die ,i never blamed him but i wish he had not found me ,as i wish he had not been disfigured ,i see many things in my mind ,but ive never met anyone who has
commited suicide ,and has come back to tell us its ok on the otherside
deppression gives us gifts ,they are burried within your very being ,you need to learn to reach deep inside yourself ,to find these gifts to help you on your journey ,three times during my teens i treid suicide ,three times i failed
at the time i didnt know why ,but now at the age of 51,i know it was the wonderful wife i hadnt met and my to unborn daughters she was yet to concieve ,my live has always been painful ,and i cry many times and wish for
peace ,but in my pain is strength ,you must find this strentgh within you
until then i will ,walk with you ,if you should look down and see only one set of footprints ,and wonder were i am ,those are my footprints ,and you are safe on my shoulders,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,JETBOY

 

[scarred4life]

in my pain is strength ,you must find this strentgh within you
until then i will ,walk with you ,if you should look down and see only one set of footprints ,and wonder were i am ,those are my footprints ,and you are safe on my shoulders,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,JETBOY

that is one hell of a quote!!!!!

 

[*Sapphire*]

that is one hell of a quote!!!!!

I believe it is from the religious poem footprints in the sand...


Last night I had a dream.
I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Across the sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand: one belonged to me, the other to the Lord.

After the last scene of my life flashed before me, I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that at many times along the path of my life, especially at the very lowest and saddest times, there was only one set of footprints.

This really troubled me, so I asked the Lord about it.
“Lord, you said once I decided to follow you, You’d walk with me all the way. But I noticed that during the saddest and most troublesome times of my life, there was only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why, when I needed You the most, You would leave me.”

The Lord replied, “My son, my precious child, I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of suffering, when you could see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.”

 

[JETBOY]

It comes from the heart

when you have looked the demon in the face ,and felt its claws tear at your
flesh ,and this i have done many times ,in its hurry to destroy you the beast
of depression leaves gifts within my soul,one of the greatest is compassion
only we who suffer understand the true power of this gift ,as the beast and
his evil little creatures surround you on the battlefeild of your mind ,they see
only a lone figure ,and as they make there attack they fall in great numbers
as the warrior inside us all lays waste to foul smelling beasts ,they are blind to the army of freinds that stand and fight beside him ,he carrys this army
within his mind ,the warrior like myself will never win ,and he will fall ,but he
will never be beaten ,that will only come when life itself ,lets him rest ,
your comment was uplifting ,i feel like i have a new allie in this battle ,JETBOY

yes it was taken from that passage ,i think it is a wonderful thing to say to someone ,its meaning says it all ,,,,,,,,,,,