too labeled

Confusedandlabeled

Confusedandlabeled

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Joined
Sep 26, 2018
Messages
28
Location
Uk
#1
I'm fed up . I feel like due to forensic diagnosis my anxiety, paranoia and depression get overlooked ((irony here is that two of my diagnosis are paranoid PD and borderline PD)) They always focus on my antisocial PD and the fact I scored 31 on my PCL-R examination , my narcissistic PD, and my sadistic personality . Nobody seems to care about my awful deep sadness and terrifying anxiety crossed with paranoid thoughts . I'm literally housebound atm because I believe if I go out my epilepsy will make me seizure and I'll fall and get a blood clot after cracking my head again . Outside seems very scary and my mood is just that of me feeling intense rage , misery , actual internal pain , self harm then it's back to rage where I think of murder and get sadistic urges ((i'm not planning on acting on them)) it's so miserable to live in this cycle of emotions.
 
InfiniteRectangles

InfiniteRectangles

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Sep 23, 2018
Messages
508
Location
Georgia, USA
#2
I understand having things get overlooked by mental health professionals. They overlook me hearing voices all the time. My therapist changes the subject whenever I bring up my voices. Have you tried telling your therapist (if you have one) that you want to talk about your depression, anxiety, and paranoia? I would try bringing it up to them and saying that it's a major problem for you, just like the other stuff. I'm assuming they are focusing on the other stuff because they feel it is important to, but I would try telling them that the depression, anxiety, and paranoia is just as important as the other things. I am sorry you are going through this. I also experience depression, anxiety, and paranoia so I know how hard it can be to live with. :hug1:
 
Confusedandlabeled

Confusedandlabeled

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Sep 26, 2018
Messages
28
Location
Uk
#3
I have a psychiatrist and two community psych nurses as part of my treatment plan. I have tried telling them I don't feel well even to the point of not being able to go to appointments or to pick up my medication from the pharmacy . They know I self-harm, have trouble going out due to abject fear and they know my thoughts are not right as in the transient psychosis that comes and goes over a course of several weeks they're also very aware of my thought insertion /magical thinking . They really don't care . You would think that due to my paranoid PD and borderline PD these would raise red flags but no . The psychiatrist just put me on abilify without even seeing me. It's like my other disorders are just in the way like they're hyper alert to them and they're worried i'm going to act on my urges or go on some mad killing spree . All this is getting to the point of neglecting my other symptoms . I have had issues from age 13 i'm 33 now((paranoia, anxiety , depression , conduct disorder)) so I have a good insight into my mental health I also know what is legally right and wrong so no im not planning somebody's murder again ((I was once involved in a back and forth texting about killing somebody so the police booked me on a conspiracy charge but I was sent to a medium secure hospital where they decided it was a mix of problems that pushed me including the clash of borderline PD and antisocial PD and although I fall into the chaotic and risky cluster when on treatment I respond well))which they seem to find hard to believe. Even typing this is giving me chest pain I really do worry that i'll end up unable to live in the community in my own home because they're trying to make me unwell on purpose or they want me to commit a crime so I can be locked back up . I must seem so irritating and whiney but it's getting too much.
 
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InfiniteRectangles

InfiniteRectangles

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Sep 23, 2018
Messages
508
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Georgia, USA
#4
Sounds like you need a new treatment team. Is it possible to see someone else? I don't think a doctor should ever put someone on a new medication without seeing them and talking to them about it first. I have to sign forms any time I start a new medication. Did they have you sign forms informing you of the risks? If you can't see a new treatment team, I'd try being as annoying as possible until they listen to you. That's what I have to do with my psychiatrist. If I'm having issues with my meds, I have to call and keep calling until they let me see him, and then I have to be very persistent and put my foot down when telling him that I need something else. Otherwise he doesn't listen to me at all.
 
Confusedandlabeled

Confusedandlabeled

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Sep 26, 2018
Messages
28
Location
Uk
#5
Are you in the states? Cos here in england I've never had to sign papers when it comes to meds .only time I've signed forms is when they section me . And lol trust me if I started being angry toward them can you imagine which diagnosis they'd jump on? Nah i'm stuck with them
 
InfiniteRectangles

InfiniteRectangles

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Joined
Sep 23, 2018
Messages
508
Location
Georgia, USA
#6
Yes, I am in the states. I didn't realize until after I submitted my reply that you probably aren't from the states. I'm sorry you are stuck with such a lousy treatment team. I'm stuck with a lousy psychiatrist because I can't afford to see anyone else, so I understand.
 
Confusedandlabeled

Confusedandlabeled

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Joined
Sep 26, 2018
Messages
28
Location
Uk
#7
I'm sorry you can't afford a decent one also . So we are both in the same boat .
 

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