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Toilet Phobia.

N

nonameatall

New member
Joined
Mar 18, 2019
Messages
2
Location
Norway
Hey.
This is pretty hard for me to write, so I'll just get right to it.

I've had this toilet phobia as long as I can remember. I remember that I used diapers for a pretty long time, like until 1st grade or something, and I guess that's not normal.
I don't recall any trauma behind my phobia, but I know that my mom has always seen me being afraid of the toilet.
It's not like I can't see a toilet, it's that I'm afraid to use one.

I got some bladder problems because of it, cause I would always hold my pee in, if that makes any sense?
The phobia is pretty bad and it's basically ruining my life.

It got better for a while when I lived with my father, but even then I felt like I couldn't trust the toilet fully, if that's even a thing. But I could use it, for both ways, even throwing up really.

I moved and it got a little worse. I kinda have a phobia against pipes and some showers as well, I guess it's linked to the toilet phobia. One time I was at my aunts house and I was gonna take a shower, but I panicked because the shower looked so terrifying (I know, it's weird) so I started crying and sort of hyperventilating.
The place I moved to had a very little bathroom, separate with the shower. I didn't like any of them, but I got used to using the toilet.
I moved again and this is where it got straight ugly. I didn't use the toilet to either pee or poop. The toilet scared me here too, but mostly because it was kinda "leaning" backwards. That terrified me.

Now I've moved again, and it has gotten better, but not quite. I can pee in the toilet, but I actually don't want to. I can't poop there, so I found another solution for that.

But I have to be honest. It's ruining my life, exposing myself to it didn't help at all, it made it worse. I've gotten to the point where I can't live like this anymore and I have no one to share my phobia with. I've told some people, but not the whole story. It's eating me alive to be honest and I have no clue how or where I got this phobia. I have no memory of it. Some toilets looks more "nicer" than others, but I'm still so scared to use them. Doesn't matter how it is, as long as it is a toilet.
I can't continue like this, it's not healthy and I have to plan everything so I can avoid using the toilet when I'm not at home.

I guess what I'm wondering is .... does anyone have the same phobia as I have? Now I mean toilets overall, not just public toilets because you're afraid of germs or someone hearing you. I mean this unexplainable energy-sucking phobia that takes control of your life.
If it's too hard for you to comment here, I completely understand that.
I'm totally lost at this point.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
R

Roseessa

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 11, 2018
Messages
106
Location
Nottingham
Hi,
I am being honest here and going to say I have never had this problem and don't know what you are going through with this fear but have you thought of seeing someone to help you get over this fear?
 
R

RyanC1997

Member
Joined
Mar 26, 2019
Messages
7
Location
Gibraltar
Hey,

It is what might seem like an irrational phobia to you. But remember that your phobia is personal to you and that there is a way out. Or atleast to help it. Have you tried speaking to a doctor about it ? Maybe try meds. I would really suggest Sertraline (zoloft) for your phobia. (speak to your doctor about it.)

Ryan
 
fazza

fazza

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 23, 2014
Messages
1,880
Location
U.K
I had a phobia of toilets all through my school life but for some reason it faded away. The only remnant of it is that a toilet has to be spotless.
 
R

RyanC1997

Member
Joined
Mar 26, 2019
Messages
7
Location
Gibraltar
I had a phobia of toilets all through my school life but for some reason it faded away. The only remnant of it is that a toilet has to be spotless.
Is this not more of an OCD condition rather than a fear or phobia? or a phobia of germs?
 
fazza

fazza

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 23, 2014
Messages
1,880
Location
U.K
I suppose you could be right. Never really linked the two together but it makes sense in what you are saying.
 
fazza

fazza

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 23, 2014
Messages
1,880
Location
U.K
The funny thing also is that I am on sertraline and have been for years. perhaps it was the meds that finally put this problem to bed
 
K

Kitty kat

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 23, 2019
Messages
83
Location
England
I not like using public toilets but if you got to pee you got to pee
 
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