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thinking.of quitting work

Tired Daisy

Tired Daisy

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Joined
Mar 30, 2016
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5,437 miles from Hollywood
I feel my boss is a bully, and urges me to harass colleagues to work faster. I am wondering whether I should disclose this.
I think it might be worth having a chat with your boss and if he don't listen book an appointment with C.A.B it might be worth pulling a sicky for a couple weeks or look for something less stressful.
 
W

*winofunk*

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Joined
Oct 29, 2018
Messages
103
I feel my boss is a bully, and urges me to harass colleagues to work faster. I am wondering whether I should disclose this.
Hello Burt. Happy Sunday!

There is some great information on the ACAS website on bullying and harrassment. They have a booklet for employees. The link to the booklet can be found at:

Bullying and harassment - Acas Mobile

I raised a grievance about health and safety issues in the workplace, and following this bullying in the workplace. After my first grievance, which was initially dismissed but later upheld on appeal, the relationship between myself and management was greatly soured. So when considering a complaint about bullying, I did not have to worry about it worsening my relationship with my boss - it could not possibly get any worse.

One thing that definitely helped was the fact that I was off on sick leave when I raised a complaint about bullying. The environment at work was so toxic that it made me unwell to the point that I needed to take time off. So I was not in the workplace while my complaint was being investigated.

As with my grievance about health and safety issues, my complaint about bullying and harrassment was initially dismissed by the head of HR. I went ahead and appealed. But rather than investigate the complaint, the CEO proposed a settlement agreement - they paid me to shut me up to prevent any further action (I had threatened to take them to an employment tribunal for discrimination and constructive unfair dismissal).

The people I wanted to see get sacked did not get sacked. It just got brushed under the carpet and they carried on. Nothing has changed there.

If you believe there is bullying in the workplace then I believe you should raise a grievance. Maybe it won't change anything. But at least you know in yourself you have done the right thing.

On the other hand, you are intent on leaving anyway. Why bother muddying the waters?
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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Mordor
Hi wf.

I don't think I can handle doing anything that serious. I have only been in the job for 2.5 months so I don't think I can do anything.

Hopefully it will all be over soon, and I can focus on doing something else.

Thanks for your help.
 
R

ramboghettouk

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london
it's a pity you can't say to your boss lay off me or i'm leaving and put pressure on him
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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it's a pity you can't say to your boss lay off me or i'm leaving and put pressure on him
I am just going to leave. That's enough. Leaving will cause him trouble, but I don't care anymore. He has treated me like a temp worker from day one.
 
Tired Daisy

Tired Daisy

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Joined
Mar 30, 2016
Messages
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Location
5,437 miles from Hollywood
I am just going to leave. That's enough. Leaving will cause him trouble, but I don't care anymore. He has treated me like a temp worker from day one.
I think that's the best thing to do.

If you do decide to go back tell him that he should treat you better and if he don't you will quit.
 
T

Tabby 88

Guest
You are sweating on this so much. You said in the beginning it was affecting your mental health and you were drinking more at the weekend i think. It is too much for you at the moment and not the sort of work you need and not the sort of work you want. In addition, you don't get on with your boss.

You can go sick now, or you can hand your notice in, i don't know the restrictions with benefits. That really is the main thing to find out, can i hand my notice in and then get esa or do i have to go sick? Fortunately you have a diagnosis that means you should be able to get a sick note and get esa. It is shit on esa but i think being in a job that is not good for my mental health is far worse as the consequences can be dangerous to life or destructive to life.

The boss can't help being a shit and you can't help being on meds and having a more delicate chemistry or whatever in the hell goes on in our brains. Dont' sweat on it all Christmas mate.

Edit: my dad says better the devil you know. He says i should be working. Ignore him, i do.
 
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LORD BURT

LORD BURT

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
30,964
Location
Mordor
You are sweating on this so much. You said in the beginning it was affecting your mental health and you were drinking more at the weekend i think. It is too much for you at the moment and not the sort of work you need and not the sort of work you want. In addition, you don't get on with your boss.

You can go sick now, or you can hand your notice in, i don't know the restrictions with benefits. That really is the main thing to find out, can i hand my notice in and then get esa or do i have to go sick? Fortunately you have a diagnosis that means you should be able to get a sick note and get esa. It is shit on esa but i think being in a job that is not good for my mental health is far worse as the consequences can be dangerous to life or destructive to life.

The boss can't help being a shit and you can't help being on meds and having a more delicate chemistry or whatever in the hell goes on in our brains. Dont' sweat on it all Christmas mate.

Edit: my dad says better the devil you know. He says i should be working. Ignore him, i do.
Hi Tabby. I agree with you.

I do have a quit plan tho. This thursday I get paid, so waiting for that. Then also on thursday I have doc appt. to get my sick note. Then on the next thursday I will hand my notice into HR as boss will be on leave. That is my plan.

I know I could hand my notice in on Friday, but can't handle the face to face with boss. just can't do it.
I have only been in the job less than 3 months, (after 7 years unemployed) so I think it is unfair if they feel I am too important to leave like that.

Like you said before, they will cover for me when I leave. I reckon some people in the office will find it funny the way I leave I guess.

I would like to work, but I think I should make an effort to do something meaningful even though it might be hard at first. i could work with the disabled or mentally ill.
 
T

Tabby 88

Guest
Nothing wrong with saving yourself awkwardness or stress, better to do it quickly and easily for yourself.

There is always a replacement. Even the Queen is not indispensible. I am sure she can spell it though.

It was good work experience. We should be able to do this anyway, but they don't provide it for us so we have to find it ourselves. You should be proud of yourself. Other people might be negative about you quitting but i know how hard it would all be for me. I will do it one day also, but not yet.
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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Messages
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Nothing wrong with saving yourself awkwardness or stress, better to do it quickly and easily for yourself.

There is always a replacement. Even the Queen is not indispensible. I am sure she can spell it though.

It was good work experience. We should be able to do this anyway, but they don't provide it for us so we have to find it ourselves. You should be proud of yourself. Other people might be negative about you quitting but i know how hard it would all be for me. I will do it one day also, but not yet.
I think my boss has brainwashed me with this dumb job. Once it is over I can relax again.

There is a chance I could get another job in the same field. If that happens I will give it a go, perhaps it might be more chilled. But in a general sense, I kinda think now, that I don't have to work in an office.

Even my volunteer job which was office based was hard. I just got fed up there. I enjoyed volunteering in the charity shop because it was down to earth and did not feel so serious.
 
T

Tabby 88

Guest
If at first you don't succeed...

but before you try again, have a nice Christmas. When the snow has gone, Spring has sprung, the tough get going.
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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I am having second thoughts about quitting. at least my savings are growing in this job. do I really want to put myself at the mercy of the job market?? can I really be a support worker??
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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Messages
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I think I will stick with this job for now. It is my only income source. It was stressing me out trying to work out what to do with money.

I was miserable at the thought of having a sneaky exit strategy and avoiding my boss. I was just running away.

It has been hard start to this job, but I have learned a lot. It would be a shame to quit now, when it is becoming easier.

If I want to be independent then I need this job. I will carry on with it and see what happens. If I get sacked then so what - at least I tried.

Who knows, I could end up with a good job in the private sector??

And I need to take a holiday too.
 
T

Tabby 88

Guest
I'm glad you have come to a decision and feel able to keep working there. It's the best outcome. You could see how you feel again in x months time. :clap: You lucky thing, having extra money.

Keep a check on your mental health though. It is priority.
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

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Messages
30,964
Location
Mordor
I'm glad you have come to a decision and feel able to keep working there. It's the best outcome. You could see how you feel again in x months time. :clap: You lucky thing, having extra money.

Keep a check on your mental health though. It is priority.
The whole quitting thing was stressing me out. It was a good option but I feel calmer now that I decided to stay on. I will try and make it a few months into 2019 and see how I feel then.

Thanks for your help T.
 
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