thinking.of quitting work

burt tomato

burt tomato

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
29,017
Location
Mordor
#21
Yeah, if it's not working out, I agree with your dad.

At least you've done it, and now got a better idea of what you want to do, so you've gained a huge amount from it.

Hopefully, as you say, now you have a plan and know it won't last, it should hugely reduce the stress :)
Thanks M. Yeah it has been too stressy for me. I feel stressed when I am at home about it. I am really tempted to just get a sick note, and not work any of my notice. I check the .gov website, and they still have to pay me. I know it is not professional, but I am past caring now.

The only thing is, is that boss will be away, and I am the only one who can monitor the system for faults. IDK. The other option is to work while boss is on holiday and then leave before he comes back. I am too scared to confront my boss, and I know its dumb, but I just can't face him.
 
F

Funnyday

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 15, 2016
Messages
435
#22
Burt do what makes you feel best. Get a sick note from the doctor and leave them too it. Your own wellbeing is what matters.
 
Hopefuloldie

Hopefuloldie

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 30, 2018
Messages
95
Location
UK
#25
If you are finding it that stressful, then I would find the quickest way out - there's no real benefit in trying to tough it out. There will always be opportunities to start again once you feel stronger x
 
Mayfair

Mayfair

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 12, 2010
Messages
32,384
Location
8,539
#26
As a new starter, does the 6 week notice still come into play burt?

I want you to be well and out of there, but also consider the best way out, as this may be a reference in new jobs that do suit you.

I can't imagine that you need to give 6 weeks notice as a new starter, but without knowing more, I can't say.

If it is, then I would look to what you said about put notice in now, see what happens - they might actually say you can go now (they will ask why you notice, and you can say unhappy, and nothing more) - saving all the hassle and stress of doc's notes etc. If they don't, then perhaps go for the option of going to docs.

I think should consider all options. And work out best and least stressful.

-

Try not to stress about it now burt.

The good thing is you've decided, and on top of this, gained huge knowledge on what you want (hours wise, jobs wise AND what you missed). All this is great info for the future, I think :)
 
Last edited:
burt tomato

burt tomato

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
29,017
Location
Mordor
#27
As a new starter, does the 6 week notice still come into play burt?

I want you to be well and out of there, but also consider the best way out, as this may be a reference in new jobs that do suit you.

I can't imagine that you need to give 6 weeks notice as a new starter, but without knowing more, I can't say.

If it is, then I would look to what you said about put notice in now, see what happens - they might actually say you can go now (they will ask why you notice, and you can say unhappy, and nothing more) - saving all the hassle and stress of doc's notes etc. If they don't, then perhaps go for the option of going to docs.

I think should consider all options. And work out best and least stressful.

-

Try not to stress about it now burt.

The good thing is you've decided, and on top of this, gained huge knowledge on what you want (hours wise, jobs wise AND what you missed). All this is great info for the future, I think :)
I have pretty much decided that I will get a sick note, it just depends on how long I work for.

Boss is on leave for three weeks from Xmas, so may decide to work those weeks to cover his absence.

I can always get a standard reference from HR.

I have no idea what sort of work to do afterwards. May just be easier to reclaim ESA, and may try to get PIP this time too.

Having a 6 week notice, means I get 6 weeks worth of pay which may be useful when I have no income.
 
claude

claude

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 13, 2017
Messages
709
#28
when did you sign off ESA burt? I know for a little while you can do a rapid reclaim for ESA that reinstates your old claim if working doesn't work out. I think for most benefits it is a 12 week window to do a rapid reclaim. I dunno if you are out of that though?

I think you are wise to prioritise your health, i wish you all the best with it all :hug1:
 
burt tomato

burt tomato

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
29,017
Location
Mordor
#29
when did you sign off ESA burt? I know for a little while you can do a rapid reclaim for ESA that reinstates your old claim if working doesn't work out. I think for most benefits it is a 12 week window to do a rapid reclaim. I dunno if you are out of that though?

I think you are wise to prioritise your health, I wish you all the best with it all :hug1:
I signed off on Sept 30th. I think I will just miss the window.

Thanks, claude, I have tried my best, maybe in different circumstances, it could have worked out. But now I am afraid to ask boss advice because he mocks me.
 
W

*winofunk*

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 29, 2018
Messages
103
#30
Hello Burt. Good afternoon!

Only just seen this thread. By reading it I can only conclude that you have moved on from thinking about it, and are now planning your exit.

With it being Saturday you are hopefully in a pub somewhere relaxing and enjoying a pint.

If you have made the decision to leave, is there any point in making yourself miserable by continuing to go in? If you are not enjoying it, do not put yourself through it. It is admirable that you are being responsible, acknowledging that you will be monitoring the systems in your boss' absence, and delaying doing anything with this in mind.

That said, you need to look after yourself. Get back to doing the things that you enjoy - the things that make you happy.

If you were to give notice and hand in a fit note, they might cancel your boss' annual leave :) How's that for a parting gift? :)

PS. I still think the 6 week notice period is abhorrent considering you have been there for such a short period of time.
 
burt tomato

burt tomato

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
29,017
Location
Mordor
#31
Hello Burt. Good afternoon!

Only just seen this thread. By reading it I can only conclude that you have moved on from thinking about it, and are now planning your exit.

With it being Saturday you are hopefully in a pub somewhere relaxing and enjoying a pint.

If you have made the decision to leave, is there any point in making yourself miserable by continuing to go in? If you are not enjoying it, do not put yourself through it. It is admirable that you are being responsible, acknowledging that you will be monitoring the systems in your boss' absence, and delaying doing anything with this in mind.

That said, you need to look after yourself. Get back to doing the things that you enjoy - the things that make you happy.

If you were to give notice and hand in a fit note, they might cancel your boss' annual leave :) How's that for a parting gift? :)

PS. I still think the 6 week notice period is abhorrent considering you have been there for such a short period of time.
I am not in the pub yet, might pop in to get a cheeky Guinness :)

My plan is to get through the next two weeks at work, and then hand my notice in after xmas to HR. All my managers will be on xmas break.

Yes I do miss my freedom. I miss going to the day centre for men's group and board games group. I miss doing country walks. I just miss being relaxed, and working on my mental health. I would like to join an art class. I have proved to myself that I can wake up early everyday. Maybe I can do a morning walk.

I did chat about my job situation to my GP and he understood.

LOL you are funny. Yes I have imaginations of my boss being in a rage when he finds out I have quit. IDK if he is staying at home on his holiday or going away. He does have a laptop so theoretically he can log in remotely.
 
E

exyz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 14, 2017
Messages
2,757
#32
Hello Burt, looking in again here:hug5:

I'm glad that you have made your decision, I think it is the call having caught up with all your later posts here.

Your health is the most important thing. You have given it your best shot and if you are not enjoying it then time to move on.

Good that you spoke to the GP, definitely apply for PIP and I hope that the ESa situation can be sorted.
All good wishes to you x
 
L

letmein

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 10, 2016
Messages
649
#33
I am slightly calmer today knowing that I have a plan to quit. still stressful though. I am glad it is Friday. my dad came round last night. I told him I was suicidal and he told me to stuff the job
hey dude, how are you sorry i wasn't around @ the weekend but i had a massive stress head.... and loads of dark thoughts...

you feeling any better?
 
burt tomato

burt tomato

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
29,017
Location
Mordor
#34
I am at work now. it is shit. I don't want to be here. boss has not given me enough work to do so pretending to be busy. I am expecting him to pounce on me any second.

he was being an ass this morning. I have no second thoughts about quitting. maybe he wants me to quit because he can't deal with my mental health. idk.
 
Tabby 88

Tabby 88

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Oct 20, 2018
Messages
473
#35
I would quite like to work at a funeral business. It would suit me and my interest in death.
Me too. After my encounter with mental illness, and my getting older, it is something i have thought about also. I am sorry to admit it, but what you have said here has made me feel so relieved. I always read your posts talking about returning to work and felt so anxious that i had to do that too. Your psychiatrist saying they would like to see you working too, i hoped he/she meant that they hoped you would realise your dreams rather than that they thought you were capable of full-time work after 7 years, medication, and a brain possibly affected by illness and medication.

I know myself that i cannot do what i used to do for work, because i cannot keep up with cleaning house and self as well as i could. I don't know why the change in ability. Age may be a factor too.

Yesterday i was told by family i should get a job and that i would be surprised at how much better i would feel. It sent me into another panic but i know deep down that it would have to be a certain type of job and certain hours with some flexibility. I don't think it exists yet, or i don't think the benefit system is that flexible yet either.

You tried, which was impressive, and you have learnt from the work experience, what you need now, what type of work also. Next time you will choose better. You could get everything ready to claim esa again and once you are back on it, you can have a rest for a while and then get back to searching for something more suitable.
 
burt tomato

burt tomato

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
29,017
Location
Mordor
#36
Me too. After my encounter with mental illness, and my getting older, it is something i have thought about also. I am sorry to admit it, but what you have said here has made me feel so relieved. I always read your posts talking about returning to work and felt so anxious that i had to do that too. Your psychiatrist saying they would like to see you working too, i hoped he/she meant that they hoped you would realise your dreams rather than that they thought you were capable of full-time work after 7 years, medication, and a brain possibly affected by illness and medication.

I know myself that i cannot do what i used to do for work, because i cannot keep up with cleaning house and self as well as i could. I don't know why the change in ability. Age may be a factor too.

Yesterday i was told by family i should get a job and that i would be surprised at how much better i would feel. It sent me into another panic but i know deep down that it would have to be a certain type of job and certain hours with some flexibility. I don't think it exists yet, or i don't think the benefit system is that flexible yet either.

You tried, which was impressive, and you have learnt from the work experience, what you need now, what type of work also. Next time you will choose better. You could get everything ready to claim esa again and once you are back on it, you can have a rest for a while and then get back to searching for something more suitable.
I am sorry if you felt you should work as well. I think I needed to give it a go to find out where I am at.

Also I would say if the circumstances were different, i.e. if my office was a lot more relaxed, perhaps I would be happy to continue.

I am always on edge in the office. Always feeling as if I am going to get in trouble. And boss does not give me enough work, so I have to pretend to work, which is incredibly stressful. You need to have a working answer, in case he asks what I am doing.

I just want to walk away from it now. I can keep up the early starts for much longer. It is tough with the anti-psychotic medication I am on. I have no life when I am working. It takes too much out of me.

Yes at the beginning it was all fine, and I was back in career mode, but working with an active mental health condition is tough. My boss has not mentioned my mental health even though I disclosed at interview. He has not asked me if I would like any special arrangements. I am not sure if it has even registered with him.

I find it hard to focus at work and get anxious and panicky. I think this is a result of mental health. I have been able to do my work, but boss still finds faults with me.

He found faults with me today, but it was just because I have never done the process before, but he expects me to know it. It makes it easier to walk away when he acts like an ass.

Once I had my notice, and sick note in to HR, I will just go home and switch off my phone. They will probably try and call me and I dont want that. I don't care if they dont pay me for my notice period, i just want to walk away. I have had enough now.
 
Last edited:
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
8,189
Location
basketville
#37
Hello Burt. Good afternoon!


PS. I still think the 6 week notice period is abhorrent considering you have been there for such a short period of time.
fair enough if burt was entitled to 6 weeks holiday maybe and i guess if the pay is eye wateringly high i guess....
 
burt tomato

burt tomato

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
29,017
Location
Mordor
#38
I was wondering whether I should say I feel like my boss is a bully, and he has been putting me under pressure to harass people. I wonder if I should write it on my quit letter.
 
Tabby 88

Tabby 88

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Oct 20, 2018
Messages
473
#39
You could just go sick now and get ssp, then move on to sick benefit. Is that how it works? Then you can leave straight away. Drinking when on medication isn't a good idea.

I don't think you should complain about the boss or work, just blame your medication/illness/stress causing some symptoms to worsen. Your boss may be having a hard time too. Maybe that is why he is not giving you an easy time, because he doesn't feel that well himself.
 
burt tomato

burt tomato

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
29,017
Location
Mordor
#40
You could just go sick now and get ssp, then move on to sick benefit. Is that how it works? Then you can leave straight away. Drinking when on medication isn't a good idea.

I don't think you should complain about the boss or work, just blame your medication/illness/stress causing some symptoms to worsen. Your boss may be having a hard time too. Maybe that is why he is not giving you an easy time, because he doesn't feel that well himself.
My boss always seem relaxed IMO. I do not think he is having a hard time at all.

I have an apt. with my GP next thursday to get my sick note. I just have to get through work for these two weeks.

My boss has never mentioned my mental health. He does not seem interested. A workplace is toxic when these type of issues cannot be discussed.