thinking about my therapist while having sex

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sunsetvalley

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#1
It's been going on for weeks. First it was like a "sexual fantasy" that I didn't want to have, that I avoided so bad, and then I became used to it, but felt so wrong either way. Now, I don't see this therapist anymore (nothing major hapenned, it's not relevant) but I still think about him as I'm having "revenge sex" with my partner, like it could be him instead, my head says things like "look what you are missing" and things like that, sorry if I'm being too explicit.

It feels so good and feels so wrong. I feel disgusted. But STILL I wish I could have sex with him, this is making me crazy.
Please, I really need to stop this thoughts. I don't know what it means either. My partner doesn't deserve this and I don't either. :confused:
 
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sunsetvalley

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#2
By the way, I'm suffering from self referential and psychotic thoughts in general for a long time now, maybe that's relevant.

(sorry I have no clue how to edit this post, I'm new here)
 
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EstherRose94

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#3
It's been going on for weeks. First it was like a "sexual fantasy" that I didn't want to have, that I avoided so bad, and then I became used to it, but felt so wrong either way. Now, I don't see this therapist anymore (nothing major hapenned, it's not relevant) but I still think about him as I'm having "revenge sex" with my partner, like it could be him instead, my head says things like "look what you are missing" and things like that, sorry if I'm being too explicit.

It feels so good and feels so wrong. I feel disgusted. But STILL I wish I could have sex with him, this is making me crazy.
Please, I really need to stop this thoughts. I don't know what it means either. My partner doesn't deserve this and I don't either. :confused:
I think a lot of people could relate. The thought popping into your head was random. It stuck because you dwelled on it. I’ve had OCD since I was 6 or so and had my fair share of unwanted obsessions. It means nothing about who you are or what you really want. It’s just a silly thought that hangs around because it got an emotional response (disgust) from you. Try not to worry about it and it will lose its power. Laugh it off to yourself and it will eventually go away. It’s okay to have those weird thoughts bc everyone does. When we’re anxious people we tend to worry about them but no need to 😊
 
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sunsetvalley

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#4
I think a lot of people could relate. The thought popping into your head was random. It stuck because you dwelled on it. I’ve had OCD since I was 6 or so and had my fair share of unwanted obsessions. It means nothing about who you are or what you really want. It’s just a silly thought that hangs around because it got an emotional response (disgust) from you. Try not to worry about it and it will lose its power. Laugh it off to yourself and it will eventually go away. It’s okay to have those weird thoughts bc everyone does. When we’re anxious people we tend to worry about them but no need to 😊
Thank you Esther, I never actually thought it could be that simple... but it makes sense.
 
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EstherRose94

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#5
I know it never seems that simple because it feels truly scary to us so we assume it’s worth being afraid of but it really isn’t. No problem, I literally just talked myself down from a panic attack like an hour after I talked to you lol
 
megirl

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#6
I don't think these sort of things are that uncommon.
We all can get an attachment to our therapist, or councillor etc.
I really like my support worker not in that kind of way. But then thoughts just pop up.
The other week I saw my psychologist with my support worker, talking away then looked at him and I was like 'shit he looks hot today' I felt my cheeks burning it was funny.
Another time it was he was chatting away I'm thinking "wow hes got fuck me eyes" umm..I didn't share those thoughts, be funny if I had.
 
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sunsetvalley

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#7
I know it never seems that simple because it feels truly scary to us so we assume it’s worth being afraid of but it really isn’t. No problem, I literally just talked myself down from a panic attack like an hour after I talked to you lol
I hope you are feeling better from panic attack (I know I'm late but my panic attacks can last days :rolleyes:) anyway, great point of view, have a nice day x
 
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sunsetvalley

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#8
I don't think these sort of things are that uncommon.
We all can get an attachment to our therapist, or councillor etc.
I really like my support worker not in that kind of way. But then thoughts just pop up.
The other week I saw my psychologist with my support worker, talking away then looked at him and I was like 'shit he looks hot today' I felt my cheeks burning it was funny.
Another time it was he was chatting away I'm thinking "wow hes got fuck me eyes" umm..I didn't share those thoughts, be funny if I had.
so funny, I used to have those "pop up" thoughts on therapy sometimes too, like he would crack his knuckles and I'd be like "damn that's sexy" in my head, or him looking at me a certain way and my mind would be like "tell him you want to have sex right know!!!" I once told him that I was feeling attached to him, which was fine I guess, but never got into so much detail, that's so scary! :LOL: x
 
TroubleinParadise

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#9
Do you find yourself truly sexually attracted to your therapist; or is it an anxious thought? Do you perhaps only have the thought because you fear yourself having these type of thoughts?
 
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sunsetvalley

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#10
Do you find yourself truly sexually attracted to your therapist; or is it an anxious thought? Do you perhaps only have the thought because you fear yourself having these type of thoughts?
This is an interesting question, because I can't actually point out wich one is it. I mean, it could be possible that I'm actually sexually attracted to him, because he's not much older than me, is not that I'm attracted to a 60 year old and I'm 22, I don't want to seem evil or superficial, but I think it could make sense if you think about it from a biological point of view, if that makes sense. But on the other side, yes, it makes me anxious, and this thoughts only come in specific times when, as I said, when I'm having sexual relations with my partner or talking to him in therapy, which is pretty unconfortable and not ideal. It is concerning to me, that's for sure x
 
BPDevil

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#11
my fp used to be my therapist but now we're just friends and im still attracted to him like crazy
 
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EstherRose94

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#13
“Favorite person”, ie someone you sorta obsess over and look to for emotional support and validation.
 
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EstherRose94

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#14
Do you find yourself truly sexually attracted to your therapist; or is it an anxious thought? Do you perhaps only have the thought because you fear yourself having these type of thoughts?
It can be SO hard to untangle what’s real and what’s an obsession. It’s probably best to tell yourself “so what if it is real? Oh well. I won’t act on it”. Because if you try to figure out where the thought comes from it’ll just get stronger because you’re allotting attention to it.
 
megirl

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#15
I feel like when I see my support worker on Thursday, to ask him if hes got a younger brother I could go out with that's got the same eyes as him.
Imagine, :redface: (fuck me eyes)
No I wont, maybe once I'm discharged, no its just a thought
 

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