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Think that's me now at rock bottom - don't know what to do now...

A

AdviceSought

Member
Joined
Oct 15, 2016
Messages
17
So, it's very hard to know how to start with this as I've again, hit a mental state that leaves me genuinely terrified and a I see no way of getting on top of things.

I'll try and structure this post into each aspect that is causing me issues so as not to miss anything...

WORK SITUATION:

I continue to struggle to find work. There's very little being advertised to apply for and responses from the 12 recruitment agencies that I'm registered with have again been extremely downbeat on the prospect of anything appearing in the foreseeable future. This is putting a massive strain on me mentally and financially.

I was meant to be away on holiday this week, but due to my last role ending a month ago, much earlier than it was meant to, due to my mental health, I had to cancel, leaving me £420 out of pocket that I'd spent on flights.

In the past couple of years, I've lost multiple jobs due to my mental health problems, and have a tribunal coming up soon.

FINANCIAL SITUATION:

Due to losing these jobs, my unsecured debt, which would have been totally paid off twelve months ago now, is still almost entirely there. I have been forced to start the ball rolling with the bankruptcy process, which, would take care of that, would almost certainly see me lose my car, which would make it even harder to find employment as it would seriously limit the locations I can consider.

This will also make it much harder for me to get a more permanent living situation sorted out, which I'll explain in more detail in the next part.

LIVING SITUATION:

I'm effectively homeless due to my financial situation, living on my dads sofa. I have no prospect of being able to afford anywhere of my own. I hate this situation and it really gets me down.

This is even worse that due to my dads own financial and health situation, I will be actually homeless either by the end of this year if he can't sort out his own financial issues, or, upon his death as there will be no equity in this house or enough in insurance to clear it and allow me to remain in this house. With his health issues, it is very unlikely he will live long enough that there will be a solution to my financial situation.

This is just something else that weighs heavily on me.

DIET:

Comfort eating is something I really can't get out of and I can't remember the last day that I didn't eat a whole lot of rubbish. This is seeing my weight continue to rise. This causes multiple issues. It makes exercise harder for me as I'm not as fit as I was, it has made clothes tight fitting at a time I really can't afford to buy any replacements and it puts my general health at risk as well, seeing as I'm type 2 diabetic, although the condition has been well controlled by diet since diagnosis.

TREATMENT:

I've now been advised to come off the latest lot of anti-depressants. These are the SIXTH different ones I've been on and were suggested as a LAST OPTION by the psychiatrist at the psychiatric hospital. That these have also failed have left me terrified that nothing will work.

As of now, the following has been tried and failed: Six different anti-depressants, two blocks of counselling, online CBT and face to face CBT.

Each time something else has failed, I've dipped again mentally and I'm now resigned to the fact that nothing will work and I'll never get better.

OTHER ISSUES:

I have very few friends or anyone else that I can rely on to meet up with and talk to, or help me.

I'm not getting on with my dad and I hate the fact I'm stuck living with him.

Nothing I've ever tried in my life has ever gone right, my entire life, all aspects, are a complete mess and I genuinely wish I wasn't here. although I'm not brave enough to try and end things.

I just don't see how things can or will improve for me and I can't put up with this much longer.

There's nothing else that I can try and nobody else left that can help me.
 
J

jaketurnbull

New member
Joined
Jul 6, 2017
Messages
2
I'm really sorry to hear about your problems. As a start, I would get your debts written off. There are charities that can help you do this. Go to Asking creditors to write off debt due to exceptional circumstances for example.

Secondly, in terms of finding a job, volunteering at a local charity shop or soup kitchen or homeless shelter gives you the routine of working although no income. But it benefits your mental health because you are making a positive difference for others.

Thirdly, never use absolutes or value judgements when assessing your past or current life. We're all equal as fellow human beings, and just because you're not the best at something (or indeed anything) doesn't mean your life is worth any less than anyone else's. I'm not as fast a sprinter as Usain Bolt, I'm not as successful in business as Richard Branson, I've not had as many chart successes as Paul McCartney but that doesn't mean they are better human beings than I am. We're all fundamentally equal in life, regardless of what we do our achieve.
 
A

AdviceSought

Member
Joined
Oct 15, 2016
Messages
17
I'm really sorry to hear about your problems. As a start, I would get your debts written off. There are charities that can help you do this. Go to Asking creditors to write off debt due to exceptional circumstances for example.

Secondly, in terms of finding a job, volunteering at a local charity shop or soup kitchen or homeless shelter gives you the routine of working although no income. But it benefits your mental health because you are making a positive difference for others.

Thirdly, never use absolutes or value judgements when assessing your past or current life. We're all equal as fellow human beings, and just because you're not the best at something (or indeed anything) doesn't mean your life is worth any less than anyone else's. I'm not as fast a sprinter as Usain Bolt, I'm not as successful in business as Richard Branson, I've not had as many chart successes as Paul McCartney but that doesn't mean they are better human beings than I am. We're all fundamentally equal in life, regardless of what we do our achieve.
Unfortunately, the debt can't be written off. That's why I'm now having to go down the bankruptcy route.

Although I'm not sure how I'll find the money to pay the application fee for that either. This is so frustrating, as had I not had employers end my employment due to my mental health issues, I'd actually have had it all paid off about a year or so ago.

In terms of volunteering, I have done that before, however, at the moment, there's nothing really local to me and I can't afford the travel costs to anywhere that I can volunteer at.
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
9,385
Location
basketville
bit lame but i have heard if you just pay a minimum each month of £! then they cant do nothing dunno how true this is just a thoght
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
30,917
Location
Mordor
I lost my job at the end of 2011. I had large unsecured debts. I went bankrupt in 2012. I also got a dx, of schizophrenia in 2011.

It's not the end of the world. Bankruptcy got rid of my debts and i could start again.

I claimed ESA disability benefits. You can also claim a council property when you get benefits.

6 years later my credit score is excellent and I have a new job.
 
T

TeddyJameswithmanybrains

New member
Joined
Aug 22, 2016
Messages
1
Are you in the U.S. ?
I don't mean to be presumptive , but it sounds to me as i read your post that you might be in a european country.

The reason for my question is your employment. Or lack there of. As there are literally more than 300 GOOD , REAL jobs listed within 20 miles of my location. I could recommend some to you if you are anywhere near central Florida.
 
A

AdviceSought

Member
Joined
Oct 15, 2016
Messages
17
Are you in the U.S. ?
I don't mean to be presumptive , but it sounds to me as i read your post that you might be in a european country.

The reason for my question is your employment. Or lack there of. As there are literally more than 300 GOOD , REAL jobs listed within 20 miles of my location. I could recommend some to you if you are anywhere near central Florida.
I'm in Scotland.

So, nowhere near Florida.
 
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