Panic attacks back. Not full on but that stage where you feel you're at the edge of the precipice and have to pull yourself back at the last second before you fall into the abyss. Days are just drifting along aimlessly. Get up, surf the net, get to the end of every single day and think what have I done? The answer is always nothing. Comfort eating and drinking so out of control that I can't seem to break out of it and think what's the point because I look at myself and hate myself. Not even enjoying it. Just eating and drinking shit and then thinking afterwards why did I do that? I didn't even like it. Think a lot about harmful things and none of them seem to trouble me. The thoughts all seem strangely positive.