- Feb 2, 2019
I used to love all benzodiazepines, but Xanax more then all the others. I believed that I was warned of all the dangers of Xanax addiction. So for years I only used them therapeuticly, trying to avoid addiction. Until 2016 when I had to go to a stressful situation that lasted for months and I broke my rule of only using benzos for a short period of time and only for therapeutic purposes. I believed that I knew what addiction is, as I knew many people who struggled with addiction, I saw them shaking and craving as they went down the road of addiction. Since I never experienced any craving, I ended up believing that benzos cannot be compared with narcotics as I was still able to stay clean for a whole week without any problems. So I begun using them recreationally, at ever larger dosages. I knew someone who owned two drug stores so I had unlimited acces to them. Over time my dose went up to 60 mg of Xanax. And I was using them every other day. Sometimes I went even higher, much higher, exceeding 200 mg in 24 hours. And in all this time I was feeling OK, I was doing better than ever at work, I excercised routinely, even kept a healtly diet. But it was all a big illusion. My body became addicted to Xanax and my supplier was arrested for drug trafficking. In November 2017 I was sober for the third day in a row and I was out of Xanax. I was still feeling OK, not feeling any craving when I went into convulsive status epilepticus, which is a very dangerous life threatening condition that requires immediate medical intervention. And after all I experienced I feel that is my moral obligation to warn any benzodiazepines users: there are no warning signs! None! You can be in very serious danger and totally unaware of it!