the girlfriend

[smartie10]

I'm currently dating someone with bipolar and i guess i just need some advice or something to help me with how i'm finding it.
i'm only 17 and the relationship isn't necessarily 'serious' as such, i'm off to university in a while and i don't know if we'll attempt to make it work or not. so part of me can't help but wonder...is it worth it?
obviously i love him to pieces, else i wouldn't have stuck around for so long; we've been through a fair bit together but it's just so up and down.
i get angry at him for making me feel the way i do, then suffer from guilt for thinking that way because i know it's not his fault.

he's rude, unreliable and can really hurt me at times. he constantly dangles all these girls who like him in front of my face, even though i've told him i really don't like it.
then he switches and he's the loveliest guy in the world, telling me he loves me, apologising for how he's been, offering to go out and reassuring me that these girls 'mean nothing in that way'
but it's draining and i sometimes reach breaking point where i just don't know what to do. he's affecting my moods, making me feel low and irritable.
i try and be there, i listen, i reassure him, if he ever needed me i'd be right there and i tell him all this. i try not to get angry or upset. he does mean a hell of a lot to me.
but i can't talk to my friends about it because they don't really understand it or they end up angry because of how upset i become. and i can't talk to him, because he can get angry. i'm constantly walking on thin-ice with him.

how do i deal with this?!
what can i do to make him understand where i'm coming from?

thanks.

 

[littlemermaid28]

ah hun,it must be very hard for you at only 17 to put up with all this!thinking of it from a mums point of view I would say you are too young to take on such responsibility and although u have strong feeling for him it sounds like quite a destructive relationship for both you and him which will be doing none of you any good.

I think deep down you know what you need to do and are posting on here for reassurance its the right thing.You need to live your life,go off to uni and do all the things a girl of your age should do without all this on your shoulders.

Him danggling girls in front of you cannot be doing your confidence any good and as you says his behaviour is making you feel low and irritable so as hard as it may be I think you should go off to uni with a clean slate babe and finish it. Good luck xxxx

 

[DiagnosisBipolar2]

I agree with littlemermaid. I also wonder how much of his behavour is his own choice. Some people hide behind their label and use it as an excuse to treat others badly; this could well be the case here.

However that said we dont know how much of his behavior is caused by his illness and how much of it is his "choice"

There is no excuses for treating someone in the manner you have described therefore get out of this volatile relationship and find someone who treats you right.

Bipolar disorder is no excuse for treating someone badly.