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The darkness has returned

IcyShadow

IcyShadow

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 12, 2020
Messages
58
Location
UK
My Intro gives a rough sketch of me. First time back for a year.

Anyway the last few weeks the darkness has returned. I am seeking therapist help and have a telephone appointment in a few days. I don't find meds help, so haven't asked Dr for any.

For years I have lived on my own as I have learnt others can and will hurt you. I've built that wall to protect myself. Well stupidly I let someone through that wall recently and the hurt came too. Sometimes in the darkness you so want to be felt wanted and not alone that you become vunerable. It's like being hungry, you'd eat food someone threw at you, eat it if they threw it on the floor next to you, and laughed at you. Your desperation for being with someone kills any self respect.

I need to build that wall back, keep everyone out.
 
D

dewey

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 16, 2019
Messages
1,559
Well obviously you can't just not let anyone into your life, everybody needs someone in their life
 
D

dewey

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 16, 2019
Messages
1,559
WHen you say you let someone in was it a friend or a lover?
Probably not a good time to be in a relationship if you have depressive tendencies you haven't resolved.

You have to be careful what friends and what lovers you let into your life but some people are great they won't hurt you or at least they won't hurt you badly and they want the best for you
 
D

dewey

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 16, 2019
Messages
1,559
You can't live by not letting anyone into yoru life, that's a ridiculous idea

THere's also levels of acquanitances like some people you can be light friends with some people you get to know them better and be closer friends

not every friendship would be a deep relationship but those friendships are still worth having
 
M

Metajob

Member
Joined
Dec 6, 2020
Messages
16
Location
England
Im too in a very dark place. Life is still intimidating and its so hard to clear it.
 
T

treasurebox

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 14, 2018
Messages
481
Location
Philippines
There will be better days for you you. You will have better relationships. Be the best version of yourself because you can. You were created to have good relationships.

Music helps me. Listen to good and uplifting songs on youtube. Music is therapeutic. What are you good at? Is it arts and crafts, cooking, baking, gardening? Do it. It will make you happy and successful.
 
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