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The aloneness

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mdddd

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 22, 2018
Messages
62
Location
Argentina, Mendoza
I pass day by day alone, ive not have a 1 on 1 talk since months, more than a year, ive not go out to met with someone more than a year, i get used to this, and im fine with it, and im just interested in meet other people who is in the same life as this. Ive not met anyone in this forums or chatrooms, i thought find lonely people in depression forums or chatrooms was going to be easy, but its been much hard than i thought, ive been joining to forums and chatrooms more than a year ago, ive still not met anyone dealing with this.

Any other, over 25 old, deals with this ?
 
B

Boring

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 29, 2017
Messages
1,892
Location
New York
i'm 25+ dealing with loneliness sometimes too
 
Bizzarebitrary

Bizzarebitrary

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 17, 2018
Messages
480
Location
California, US
Isolation. When my symptoms are bad, I don't want to be near anyone because I can't enjoy myself and I'm afraid of an emotional outburst. During those times I need to simply maintain in a predictable environment.
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
9,398
Location
basketville
yes loneliness is hard to cope with and hard to talk about irl.
 
D

dreamlands

New member
Joined
Jan 16, 2019
Messages
1
Isolation. When my symptoms are bad, I don't want to be near anyone because I can't enjoy myself and I'm afraid of an emotional outburst. During those times I need to simply maintain in a predictable environment.
This is exactly how I'm feeling right now.

I have no friends. I'm alone all the time. It's fine though... I'm used to it and I'm really introverted and a lone wolf.
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
9,398
Location
basketville
This is exactly how I'm feeling right now.

I have no friends. I'm alone all the time. It's fine though... I'm used to it and I'm really introverted and a lone wolf.
hello dreamlands and welcome i notice this is your first post. i know it sounds twee but the best thing is to be a friend to yourself ...happy in your own skin. this can also help others see you as approachable. sometimes when we have no friends it could be cos we give off stay away vibes
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
9,398
Location
basketville
I feel pretty lonely a lot of the time :(
what can you do to change this? for instance i am makiing myself get out with people more but its back fired somewhat today but tomorrow is another day.
 
sunset547544

sunset547544

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 27, 2016
Messages
889
Location
UK, London
what can you do to change this? for instance i am makiing myself get out with people more but its back fired somewhat today but tomorrow is another day.
I do try a bit, I am going to meetups related to my line of work for example. I feel like supposed friends have let me down a lot in the past though and judged to based on the way I look/skin colour. I often feel quite sexually charged around women which is something I can't control. I don't act on it, it just makes me feel embarrassed, anxious and makes me hate myself. Being alone feels safer. Good luck with your efforts though I wish you luck.
 
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blacksmoke

blacksmoke

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Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
9,398
Location
basketville
I do try a bit, I am going to meetups related to my line of work for example. I feel like supposed friends have let me down a lot in the past though and judged to based on the way I look/skin colour. I often feel quite sexually charged around women which is something I can't control. I don't act on it, it just makes me feel embarrassed, anxious and makes me hate myself. Being alone feels safer. Good luck with your efforts though I wish you luck.
Yeah I had two so called friends who were fairly cruel to me and then acted like it never happened aka gas lighting. That happened a few times and then I got to thinking do you know what I am worth more than the conditional crumbs they can give me.

Have you thought of taking up running to maybe help with the sexual charge. The only way to change is when we start to feel more comfortable in our own skin. For instance if you are a quiet person and people get uncomfortable around that and you do as well = misery

If however you start to accept that you are a quiet person and start to let go of other peoples expectations/security needs –fill that silence so there is no awkward silence.

Yeah like I said tomorrow I get to try again mind you tomorrow is today lol
 
E

Esther2288

New member
Joined
Jan 17, 2019
Messages
1
Do you live in a neighborhood where there is a community center, church, or other are there other activities available where you can get involved? Maybe a painting class, or glass blowing, or something like that? What about family, do you have anyone there to help you? For me, I used to go out with the singles from our church. It was a safe place and it made it fun to have others to do things with. We usually went on day excursions like – a trip to the mountains for a climb, or out to a movie, or to a museum. Just getting together with other single people helped me so much. It may seem a bit scary at first, but it is worth a try.
 
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MaksimUmfuar

Guest
i'm using meetup.com to try and connect buuut so far nothing's caught my interest. i'm gonna take a religious class next month so that might help. maybe just try n get involved in communal events
 
Urban Hermit

Urban Hermit

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 18, 2019
Messages
2,940
I hear you, over 40 and so lonely.
Trying to connect with anyone is hard.
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
9,398
Location
basketville
i'm using meetup.com to try and connect buuut so far nothing's caught my interest. i'm gonna take a religious class next month so that might help. maybe just try n get involved in communal events
you really would be better off getting out and about and meeting real people. these forums are okish but they really dont replace real life
 
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