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Teenagers...

S

Stephers

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2015
Messages
3
I am so lost... Everything I say seems to irritates my 13 year old. She self harms, so I feel like I'm always walking on eggshells. I am so scared of saying the wrong thing. I want her to be able to talk to me and tell me what's bothering her, or is on her mind, but it just seems to always come back to the fact that she is on restriction. I have to be a parent, also. I can't just throw all discipline out the window for fear that she will harm herself. I'm just so damned confused and frustrated... Needed to vent.
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
41,336
Location
The Prancing Pony
Sounds like she has a noose around your neck. First of all get rid of any implements she can use.

You could take a hard line, and tell her what she is doing is selfish and manipulative.

You can't go on like this.
 
Kerome

Kerome

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 29, 2013
Messages
12,752
Location
Europe
Can you find out why she self harms? Some people do it out of self hate, others do it out of a need to quiet the noise in their heads, it can vary a lot. Depending on what underlies it there would be different approaches you might take to get her to adjust her thinking, before it gets too embedded.

You are obviously already taking it seriously, but maybe it's time to get some counselling on it, both for her and for you. For her so she can have an independent person to talk to, you so that you can get a handle on what you can do.
 
nonotme

nonotme

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 13, 2015
Messages
1,522
please try not to play to her game too much, kids have a great knack of making us feel shit about ourselves and they know what they are doing, they know how to play the guilt card and win..

take care of yourself first.
 
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