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Talk about my experience

S

Splashu

New member
Joined
May 6, 2015
Messages
1
Hi,

I want to talk about a story that recently has happened to me.


I was kept in a psychiatric ward for almost 3 months, you probably want to know how I got there, well I will tell you how everything started. I was smoking a lot of pot at the time (not always good quality) and when I was going out with friends I felt and thought that people are talking about me and conspiring against me it was making me really anxious.

When things got worse I saw a bug or something on the floor, wasn't sure what it was so I touched it and felt it but I now know it wasn't real. Later I have went through a weird experience in my bed, a was looking at my ex pics and started to think about her and suddenly cried and got this feeling like my body got numb, like I suffered and enjoyed it at the same time. Didn't know how to interpret it.
When I was on the edge I was really depressed and paranoid. I stayed with at the time my brother, I was upset and felt lonely as I thought every one had turned their backs on me, so I left the flat to let these negative feelings out. I though the environment was showing me sings and directions that I tried to use and interpret in a correct way, so I followed them like I was looking for something but didn't know what it was.

About 4 in the morning I was knocking on random peoples doors asking them to show me the way and I got to this door. I like black women ( best if shed smoke too ). This black woman opened the door for me and I was stunned, I saw a woman of my life. I froze and was awed then I said "Its you, I was looking for you" I wasn't completely sure if I was doing the right thing but I had to try. I asked her if we could have something to drink so we did and after that she rolled a joint and I was in heaven. We talked and I got hypnotised by her grace and beauty then I saw something even more beautiful, I saw colours flying in her, I thought I saw her soul. From that time I kept coming back to speak to her. Once when I went there I hesitated to knock on the door so I sat down on a bench and thought how amazing she is, then I got this pleasant warm feeling in my heart and genitals, I thought that was my answer that she is the one so I knocked on the door and her boyfriend opened the door and called the cops on me.

When I was kept in the ward i had an near death experience at least it felt like it, it lasted about 5 seconds but was scary, I was loosing control over my body and my eyes closed, it was getting darker and darker I was trying to move but with little effect. Occasionally I could taste pot and smell it also get dry mouth without smoking it. I thought people could ready my mind and some people had super powers like xmen. I still see floaters that I thought they guide me. Also when I listened to music I got really high like I I was charging my body with music.

warm feeling in genitals and heart
colours in a person
what is this?
 
Last edited:
SarahD

SarahD

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 21, 2014
Messages
2,095
Location
UK
Hi Splashu

Welcome to the forum. :welcome:

I read your story. It sounds like drug induced psychosis. Smoking pot can cause psychosis, I expect they told you that at the hospital. Are you better after treatment?

I hope you enjoy the forum and find it useful.

Best wishes, Sarah
 
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