suicide

[justlikeawoman]

Just thought I would post this.
Last Friday we got a message that somebody we know had taken an overdose.
The person managed to get themselves to the hospital where treatment was being administered during the course of the treatment their heart stopped.
I think, and I dont know for certain, that the person concerned was "dead" for more than three to four minutes however, they were put on a life support machine.
There ensued a flurry of activity were the hospital staff then needed to contact a member of family, of which we are not, so that the life support machine could be switched off. The person on the life support machine is apparently brain damaged and in a vegetative state.
My personal sense of anger at this is quite high. I dont understand it. It makes a sense of mockery of what I believe the medical profession is about.
People who are alive and need help and treatment can not get it because there are no beds. Then the dead are raised to life but they are not really alive so kept in suspended amination while somebody can say "turn off the machine".
Apparently a new law came into use last week or the week before regarding people on life support - you need a family member to say that the machine can be turned off.
I am not against life support used in the right way it is vital and wonderful. But surely, we have to be very careful not to play god with people's life and death.
I am not sure the person concerned truly meant to take their life. It is possible even if they hadnt taken an overdose that their heart would have stopped anyway even if they had been sitting at home watching the telly and having a cup of tea. May be the drugs in their system kicked in and the the heart wouldnt respond.
It is all very sad.
Just wondered what others think about it.
Death is final.

 

[daffy]

This is so sad and there cannot be a correct answer because unfortunatly unless a note was left, no one will know whether the person really wnted to die or if it was a cry for help. But i do understand what you say about being left in a permenant vegative state but i do think its up to the family to decide. Medics can only recommend that its switched off.

I am speaking from experience now. Two years ago my grandson was born with severe problems and put on a ventilator. I watched the pain my daughter and son in law had to go thru when the doctors told them my grandson would never get any better and advised them to let the ventilator to be turned off. He died peacefully in his mum arms.

Without knowing the background of this person no one can say whether the life should be fought for but a medics job is to preserve life

 

[justlikeawoman]

I can understand the situation regarding your baby grandson. I would agree with what happened there. I am not against life support machines I think they are vital and necessary. But this poor person I wrote in about had no family except an elderly brother who is blind and disabled.
I know being blind and disabled doesnt mean you are incapable of making decisions but it is sad that this whole scenario came to pass.
I dont think a suicide note was left but then I dont know.
I am sorry too to learn of the sadness your family has endured at the death of your grandson.

 

[justlikeawoman]

I just want to say that we received news that the life support machine has been turned off and our friend has died peacefully.
While there is tremendous sadness within us we are also relieved that one who was tormented is now at rest.

 

[daffy]

Thanks for letting us know. As you say he is at peace now

 

[ems]

Just thought I would post this.
Last Friday we got a message that somebody we know had taken an overdose.
The person managed to get themselves to the hospital where treatment was being administered during the course of the treatment their heart stopped.
I think, and I dont know for certain, that the person concerned was "dead" for more than three to four minutes however, they were put on a life support machine.
There ensued a flurry of activity were the hospital staff then needed to contact a member of family, of which we are not, so that the life support machine could be switched off. The person on the life support machine is apparently brain damaged and in a vegetative state.
My personal sense of anger at this is quite high. I dont understand it. It makes a sense of mockery of what I believe the medical profession is about.
People who are alive and need help and treatment can not get it because there are no beds. Then the dead are raised to life but they are not really alive so kept in suspended amination while somebody can say "turn off the machine".
Apparently a new law came into use last week or the week before regarding people on life support - you need a family member to say that the machine can be turned off.
I am not against life support used in the right way it is vital and wonderful. But surely, we have to be very careful not to play god with people's life and death.
I am not sure the person concerned truly meant to take their life. It is possible even if they hadnt taken an overdose that their heart would have stopped anyway even if they had been sitting at home watching the telly and having a cup of tea. May be the drugs in their system kicked in and the the heart wouldnt respond.
It is all very sad.
Just wondered what others think about it.
Death is final.

THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE WHO COMMIT SUICIDE. THE NUMBERS SEEM TO BE INCREASING DAY BY DAY.
I THINK THE MEDICAL PROFESSION ARE BETWEEN A ROCK AND A HARD PLACE WHEN IT COMES TO THINGS LIKE THIS. I SUPPOSE WHEN THEY TAKE ON THE JOB THEY DO SO TO HELP PRESERVE LIFE BUT WHAT A SAD STORY.
MANY ON THIS FORUM CAN PROBABLY FEELING DEEP EMOTIONS WITH THIS.
YES I HOPE THEY ARE AT PEACE. GONE TO A BETTER PLACE.

 

[maudikie]

Suicide.

I cannot comment on your sad story, but have you heard of the Mental Capacity Act. This should be taken to heart by all. One can make an advanced statement of what you wish about treatment etc. whilst you are not mentally incapacitated, as in a psyciatric emergency. Some people call it a living will. There is info. about it on the web.I am not sure if this Bill has gone through Parliament yet although the Mental Health Act has.
I can only think that suicide or attempted suicide are calls for help from someone who is very ill an/or very unhappy, and not getting the support they need in life. After all we all need support at some time. Has your friend had some especially hard life event which has turned her to this action?

 

[ralph1]

the bill went through last year after many ammendments, but it is still a double edged sword

 

[justlikeawoman]

I cannot comment on your sad story, but have you heard of the Mental Capacity Act. This should be taken to heart by all. One can make an advanced statement of what you wish about treatment etc. whilst you are not mentally incapacitated, as in a psyciatric emergency. Some people call it a living will. There is info. about it on the web.I am not sure if this Bill has gone through Parliament yet although the Mental Health Act has.
I can only think that suicide or attempted suicide are calls for help from someone who is very ill an/or very unhappy, and not getting the support they need in life. After all we all need support at some time. Has your friend had some especially hard life event which has turned her to this action?

thank you for your reply.
i personally didnt know her. but have been told she didnt have a childhood, but i am not sure what that means. it could mean several things. i think she probably did have an unhappy life, looking for love. she had been married several times and apparently use to play with toys, chatting away to the stuffed animals she had. but regardless - i felt a deep connection with this lady. i doubt very much she was getting the help she needed but even if she was offered it she may not have taken it.
yes - i know only too well that we all need support at some time or other and whilst i myself need support i also like to try and support those i can.

 

[maudikie]

Support.

Good for you in giving support where you can. It's a large world, and we can't cure all th ills, bit every mickle macs a muckle

 

[Windblows]

call for help

Since "The person managed to get themselves to the hospital where treatment was being administered during the course of the treatment their heart stopped." it would seem for sure that this lady was making a cry for help in her suicide bid. However even people who conceal their attempt at suicide and really do want to die (at that point) often live to be thankful that they survived.

Our mental distress and emotions can make us believe that we can't go on. Some are so unlucky they succeed in ending their life.

I am one who is thankful I survived.

 

[maudikie]

Call for help

I agree that many cases of suicide or attempted suicide are a calll for help. It is the failure of the NHS with regard to mental health , the shortage fof psychiatric trained staff - doctors, nurses etal. tat has added to the problem. It is reported that a large number of young men are in this group. Also there are suicidesin prison when people with existing mental health conditions should not be in prison in the first place.
If they come into the penal system there is very little provision for them to be referred to the appropriate "places of safety2. i,e, a hospital, a sheltered house, or "any house thaat will accept the" (quote from a former Minister for Health)
Would it not be more sensible to build more secure Units for people with severe mental health problems than a vast more number of prison places? And also to ensure that there ae sufficient trained staff to care for the, if, and until they become fit and able to live safely in the community? I am not referring to drug or alcohol addicts, but to those with severe and endringmental illness without the so caled dual diagnosis.

I am so pleased that you survived, and hpe that you are finding life is n ot quite so desperate as you must have considered at that time.
Take care.

 

[ems]

Call For Help

Since "The person managed to get themselves to the hospital where treatment was being administered during the course of the treatment their heart stopped." it would seem for sure that this lady was making a cry for help in her suicide bid. However even people who conceal their attempt at suicide and really do want to die (at that point) often live to be thankful that they survived.

Our mental distress and emotions can make us believe that we can't go on. Some are so unlucky they succeed in ending their life.

I am one who is thankful I survived.

I THINK MOST PEOPLE WHO COMMIT SUICIDE ARE MAKING A FINAL PLEA FOR HELP. SOME PEOPLE TRY DO IT SEVERAL TIME AND SUCCEED. OTHERS TRY BUT DOTCH IT UP COMPLETELY AND ARE SO DISAPPOINTED
I REMEMBER ONE LADY WHO TRIED TO TAKE HER OWN LIFE AND SHE WAS GIVEN HELP AND SUPPORT AT A AND E. SHE WAS DISCHARGED ONLY TO GO OUT AND SUCCESSFULLY DO THE SAME THING. SHE DIED THE SECOND TIME.
WHEN PEOPLE TAKE THERE OWN LIFE IT IS A TERRIBLE THING BECAUSE IT MUST BE SOMETHING DREADFUL THAT DRIVES THEM TO DO SUCH A THING.
I ALSO THINK SOME PEOPLE FIND IT DIFFICULT TO SEPARATE FANTASY FROM REALITY. WHEN THEY SEE PEOPLE DIE ON TELE AND THEY ARE BROUGHT BACK TO LIFE AND THEY LIVE HAPPY EVER AFTER - THIS ISNT THE REAL STORY. IF YOU HAD PROBLEMS BEFORE YOU ATTEMPTED TO TAKE YOUR LIFE THEY WILL STILL BE THERE IS YOU DONT DIE.
AND IF YOU DO DIE YOU DONT RESURRECT INTO ANOTHER EPISODE OF CASUALTY OR IN THE CASE OF COMPUTER GAMES - WHEN YOU DIE YOU CAN PRESS THE START BUTTON AND RESTART YOUR LIFE OR GAME.
IT IS TRAGIC. I TRIED AND I AM GLAD I DIDNT SUCCEED. I AM ILL BUT MY LIFE ISNT AS BAD AS IT COULD BE.
SO IF YOU ARE FEELING SUICIDAL TODAY - CAN I SAY IS
DONT DO IT GET SOME HELP - LIVE TO SEE ANOTHER DAY!!

 

[maudikie]

Suicide.

Don't even think about it. Look at the sky. This morning he sun is shining and the sky is blue. Pop out for a stroll, and perhpas into the corner shop. Smile at someone and they will smile back. See if there is anyone you can give a bit of help to, such as carrying their parcels, or just saying good morning. Peole do respond if you look cheerful, but tend to go the other way if you look miserable.
Join the little one's [lay group and you'll meet other mothers. they too hve their problems, you can listen to them and perhpas cheer them up.

 

[susan la]

my heart goes out to you.

I just want to say that we received news that the life support machine has been turned off and our friend has died peacefully.
While there is tremendous sadness within us we are also relieved that one who was tormented is now at rest.

I am so sorry to hear about your grand-son such a horrible loss. you are right he is at rest with angels! so sorry to hear the news. my heart goes out to you and god bless sue.x

take care and special thoughts are happy thoughts but not in this case. take carex