Suggestion??

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madsheep

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 11, 2009
Messages
607
Location
Bedfordshire
Hi Peeps. Not sure if this is going to be in the right place. But wasn't sure where to put it.
In the past few months I have been afraid to go out on my own. I even going into the garden on my own. I have no problems leaving the house with my Fiance. But the thought of leaving the house on my own terrefies me and I just cant handle the stress or anxiety.
It started off quite minor. I would get anxious and gittery in large crowds. Then it went to queues of any type, oven with just one of two people in front and behind me. Now it has gottent to the point where I wont go out unless with my fiance and prefer not to eat rather than having to go out and do the shopping.
I told my psychiatrist about it and he said it was 'social agoraphobia' or something like that. But then didnt really say much else.
THE PROBLEM IS... is that we pick up the keys to our new house on tuesday and are going to be moving all of our stuff in by next weekend.

I am so afraid that when we get to the new place that things will get worse and I wont be able to go out at all.
If I really think about it, it all started when we first started househunting. So maybe its because of the move that all this is happening.
But its got so bad that I dont even know if I can cope just being around my close family on christmas day. I have 3 sisters. two married. two with a child each. my parents and his parents.... 13 people in total. The thought petrifies me!!

And I cant sleep! I am so worried about everything all the time. I have other underlying MH problems and my psych said that its part of that, and until we get the other stuff sorted, the social anxiety thing will have to wait.
But because i am moving i might have to go on waiting lists and stuff.

omg I am soooo stressed!:cry::mad::cry::mad:

Dont know why i put all this. Just wondered if there is anyone else out there who is afraid to leave their house, because they are afraid of people???
 
sallyG

sallyG

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 4, 2009
Messages
1,693
Location
Essex England
I totally understand where your coming from as i have this too. I havent left my home on my own in over 2 yrs...when i go out someone has to be with me..either my hubby or one of my grown up kids...but,,,there is hope....I got so bad that my family got so worried about me so my sister and mum decided i needed a break from home..and i did the scariest thing ever and went on holiday abroad for a week without my hubby and children...and it did me the world of good..i still find i cant leave the house alone..but i have contemplated it..which is a step forward for me...before i wouldnt even entertain the idea.I still have trouble leaving my home town..even though ive been abroad in recent weeks..though im working on that.Im also due to go into therapy to address these issues.
I hope your house move goes well..
 
E

edgeoftheworld

Member
Joined
Dec 13, 2009
Messages
8
"Recovery lies in the places and experiences you fear"

I would recommend you read Dr Claire Weekes book 'Essential help for your nerves'. Worth its weight in gold.

I've never been agrophobic, although I believe in the early days of my anxiety if I had not faced the fear on several occasions I would have been.

Listen, you are under a lot of stress at the moment. Give yourself a break. It may sound a bit silly but sometimes I imagine I am surrounded by a bubble. Nothing matters inside the bubble. thoughts and worries can escape from the bubble but cannot re-enter. It is a place where I can let go and where time holds no meaning. I dont do this as often as I should but it does help when I do it :)

Anxiety is itself. It is the fear of what "might" happen. Tell yourself right now that you can cope. I know it is not easy but the more you can say this and the more you believe it the less fear and worry you will experience.

I do not mean to be patronizing or wishy washy in any way, but I know through my own experiences that it is the fear itself that is the problem and your anxieties can be reduced (even if it is just a little) by going through that fear with the greatest sense of willingness you can muster.

Here is two quotes about worry I find courage in.

A day of worry is more exhausting than a week of work - John Lubbock

Worry is a sustained form of fear caused by indecision - Brian Tracy
 
M

madsheep

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 11, 2009
Messages
607
Location
Bedfordshire
Thanks for your replies.
SallyG... its slightly relaxing to know that I am not the only one in the world that cant go out.
edgeoftheworld...thanks for the tips. I shall try to take it on board. Sometimes it helps to come on this forum and read the positive thoughts that people have shared with me... just to remind myself to be strong. I am still rather anxious about the prospect of going out, but at least i have now contemplated it a bit more.
:grouphug:
 
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