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Suffering from a depression whose reason I don't realise.

A

Asif Shahriar Hasan

Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2021
Messages
6
Location
Singapore
I'm a single child, never had siblings. But I always wanted a big sister. Trust me, my mother cares for a lot. But somehow I always wanted an elder sister who'd adore me and love me and take care of me.

Now I see all these great bonds between little brothers and elder sisters. And after that the sister gets married and hardly gives her brother good time. There are few who communicate daily. But a lot are there who talk once in a few days and for like 10-15 mins.

I see the brothers getting hurt or losing feelings his sister(natually) and at one point or the bond slowly detoriates and loses most of the love and care.

They're only there when they need each other(a lot of friends show up when you need them, but a sister should be more special than a friend).

And all of this has impacted me heavily, whenever I see a girl getting married I feel like someone is losing the great care/bond of his sister. When I see a baby being born and photos being posted by its maternal uncle on social media, I feel like someone has already lost the care of his elder sister.

I've even started to get annoyed by words such as priority, time etc. Whenever I hear them I picture this whole brother sister bond and get depressed by overthinking an emotional scenario.

I held up with this for a year, I thought it'd slide. I told closed ones of mine, they laughed at this issue. I don't know whats wrong with me, can anyone please help me?
 
P

princess_sana56

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 1, 2021
Messages
65
Location
huddersfield
I'm a single child, never had siblings. But I always wanted a big sister. Trust me, my mother cares for a lot. But somehow I always wanted an elder sister who'd adore me and love me and take care of me.

Now I see all these great bonds between little brothers and elder sisters. And after that the sister gets married and hardly gives her brother good time. There are few who communicate daily. But a lot are there who talk once in a few days and for like 10-15 mins.

I see the brothers getting hurt or losing feelings his sister(natually) and at one point or the bond slowly detoriates and loses most of the love and care.

They're only there when they need each other(a lot of friends show up when you need them, but a sister should be more special than a friend).

And all of this has impacted me heavily, whenever I see a girl getting married I feel like someone is losing the great care/bond of his sister. When I see a baby being born and photos being posted by its maternal uncle on social media, I feel like someone has already lost the care of his elder sister.

I've even started to get annoyed by words such as priority, time etc. Whenever I hear them I picture this whole brother sister bond and get depressed by overthinking an emotional scenario.

I held up with this for a year, I thought it'd slide. I told closed ones of mine, they laughed at this issue. I don't know whats wrong with me, can anyone please help me?
dont worry i am like a sister to you
 
Talina

Talina

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Sweden
I’m an elder sister with a little brother and I also have older siblings. Even though I’ve never been super close with my older siblings except one because the age different with the youngest of my oldest siblings is 10 years while oldest is 20 years age difference. We still gather together and meet up sometimes during the year and I can meet my lovely bunch of nephews and niece.

I haven’t lost my bond with my older siblings, specially the one I am close to while the rest we have the cordial bond which we had from the start. I’m more tight with my little brother because the age difference is only 2 years between us. But we all see each other as siblings even though some of my siblings don’t have the same parents as me.

Maybe you could try seeking professional help and try to find the reason why you get so low when you think over sister and brother bonds. They might be able to give tools on how to handle it. Because it’s causing you so much distress and worry.
 
A

Asif Shahriar Hasan

Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2021
Messages
6
Location
Singapore
I was talking about losing compassion. Didn't click the right word I guess. The feeling of talking to someone everyday and the feeling of talking with them once in a while is definitely different.
 
Talina

Talina

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Forum Safety Team
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Messages
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Location
Sweden
I was talking about losing compassion. Didn't click the right word I guess. The feeling of talking to someone everyday and the feeling of talking with them once in a while is definitely different.
So that’s what you meant with siblings bond. You can still get the same bond with good friends and parents. Not all siblings bond are like the way you mentions.

Why didn’t you want a younger sibling? Maybe there a deeper meaning than just a sibling that is causing you to feel that way.

Also how do you see a sibling bond should be? Because siblings bond truly vary between family and personal chemistry.
 
A

Asif Shahriar Hasan

Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2021
Messages
6
Location
Singapore
So that’s what you meant with siblings bond. You can still get the same bond with good friends and parents. Not all siblings bond are like the way you mentions.

Why didn’t you want a younger sibling? Maybe there a deeper meaning than just a sibling that is causing you to feel that way.

Also how do you see a sibling bond should be? Because siblings bond truly vary between family and personal chemistry.
This is the part I don't understand, this is why I came here.
 
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