- Dec 16, 2020
- South Africa
For the past few weeks I’ve been having suicidal thoughts. It’s been off and on during my past 3 years. I feel like no one understands. I try to explain it but the feedback is like why do I dwell on negative thoughts but I can’t help it. I literally physically can’t stop these thoughts. So I don’t want to talk about it anymore. It’s effected my 3 year long relationship. I feel like I should just break up with her so she can live without me and my problems. Ive lied to her and my family and friend so many times about how I feel, that I feel crazy. I go for long walks just thinking about how my life seems it’s in ruins. I am doing therapy, I’ve just recently seen a psychiatrist but it’s like what’s the point. I hate myself now again.