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Struggling to cope

A

AuraSunset

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2019
Messages
172
Location
UK
My daughter has always helped me with the things I need. It was never a lot; shopping once a week and putting the bins out and very occasionally posting mail or doing the garden. Recently she took a new job and I'm happy for her of course, but I don't know how I'm going to cope. The garden is overgrown, the bins are overflowing, the council are on my back about both, I'm eating food that's out of date and I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't have any other family or friends that can help and all my support worker keeps telling me is that I can pay to get this or that done. Pay the bin men to come into the garden and collect the bin. Hire a home help to get your shopping. Pay a gardener ... this is all very well but I can't afford to do any of those things. I don't have enough money to live on as it is and I'm struggling just to keep up with groceries, bills and debt. I have no money for anything else. Even if I did have the money, I can't even open the door to people. My support worker has to let herself in.



I'm sure there are gonna be people who tell me to stop paying for the internet but that's not an option for me. I've been house bound since 2006. I don't have any family other than my daughter who I rarely see anymore, no friends or any form of interaction with other people aside from being online. Without internet I might as well just end it because I would be sitting here looking at four walls with absolutely nothing and no one. I try so hard not to let my mind go there, but it's not easy when you have no reason to keep going. Everyday is a struggle to get through, and for what? To just be in the same hopeless situation tomorrow.
 
Tawny

Tawny

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
2,874
Location
England
The council can give you stickers to put on your bin that say COLLECT AND RETURN
The bin men will then fetch your bin and put it back, but it needs to be visible from the road. is that possible for you?

It is one important job done.

We need to break these things down into small chunks.

One thing at a time.

Shopping list
To do list

If you can go further, a weekly routine might help. I use my calendar and write
BLUE BIN
BLACK BIN
FOOD SHOP
WASH HAIR
BATH

Although it is much easier for me to buy food every couple of days because i also get overwhelmed with planning for meals. I cannot really cook a whole meal so will buy a bag of carrots, tin of beans, bread, cereal, milk. I eat a lot of cereal and toast. Crackers and jam too as crackers don't go off. Cheese. You can nibble on cheese and crackers.

It is just about thinking of easy things you can do, accepting your limitations and working around them.

Let us know if you need any help here. It sounds like the support worker doesn't want to take on any responsibility which is understandable, but she can get you phone numbers for people who can help you.
 
Tawny

Tawny

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
2,874
Location
England
There are so many organisations that can help you and we will try our best to get you their numbers too.

Do you feel comfortable telling me which council you are with?
 
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