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Starting treatment on Friday...

N

Norwegiangirl

New member
Joined
Oct 25, 2021
Messages
1
Location
Norway
Hi
I've been struggling with food since I was 12, now currently 27. I've had ups&downs since then, and for the last 8 years or so I have managed to eat normally (but because of my PCOS this has led to obesity), until january this year. And since then I've been eating next to nothing, except for this summer when I had a little better period. I've lost 32 kg and I'm still overweight. So after my friends and partner pushed me I told my psychologist that I'm not eating very much, and the immediately referred me to a specialised unit for people with eating disorders and said I have atypical anorexia. I'm not sure if I really want help, and it's an out patient treatment, which I know very little of how works. I've tried so many times to tell my self to ignore my anxiety when eating, and just eat normally. This is not working, and I'm throwing it all up straight away. I've been talking with another psychologist about food for a year now, and no matter what we talk about, I just can't eat when I come home. I feel like I'm going to treatment to talk about this, and then ending up alone with my anxiety when I get home anyway... I just don't know what to do. I want to get better, but I don't want to start eating again. I'm just filled with self-hate, anger and anxiety right now...
 
lyma

lyma

Active member
Joined
Oct 11, 2021
Messages
38
Location
Basel, Switzerland
Hi Norwegiangirl, i'm so sorry to hear that and i feel you! I've been to an outpatient program (not for an eating disorder though) and for what you write in your post, it sounds like you might benefit from it. For me the reason going to an outpatient program was, because i wouldn't progress anymore with 'just' therapy. For me personally it was a good experience, obviously not everything was good but i just think it helped me progress in a different way. It could be a chance to change your perspective on things and since there will be people dealing with it 24/7, there is also a lot of expertise. For me it was helpful, since i would get the help at the point where i needed it, not in 1 weeks time when i've scheduled my next therapy appointment. Since you've mentioned that you go to therapy, talk about it and then when you face the actual issue at hand, no one is there to support you. I believe in an outpatient program you get a more overall support....they can focus on exactly what you've been describing above. Nevertheless, i think it's important that you listen to yourself, do your research and if you don't feel comfortable going there, don't go there. But please keep your health in mind and how you see your future, how you would like to live....maybe that might help you to take a decision.

By the way I totally understand you, it's not as easy as 'just eat normally'. For me it's not the same but similar, as people tell me: 'just think about something else'. And that makes me so frustrated and angry as well....if it would be that simple, i would obviously just do it. I can totally relate to you! <3
 
A

ape130

Active member
Joined
Oct 18, 2021
Messages
35
Location
Utah
You might even look into inpatient treatment based on your description of what's going on. I have done both inpatient and outpatient and it's definitely more helpful than just therapy. Especially inpatient because they have people there available to talk to 24/7, they have rules to follow for eating and rewards systems, you have a lot of support from those going through it, there's group therapy and classes, and they help you through it all step by step. IT's scary when you first get there because you don't know what to expect, but then you will adjust. When I was in outpatient, we would eat a certain number of meals/snacks together on the unit and then a certain number at our own home to practice on our own. So it wasn't as structured as inpatient, but still very helpful.
 
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