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Something about nothing

Koi1971

Koi1971

Member
Joined
Jun 7, 2020
Messages
22
Location
Casper Wyoming
I got into a verbal chess match today about nothing, had me worked up until I traced where the actual frustration was, it wasn't anger, to me anger is secondary, there is something underneath it. The feeling has been brewing for about a week, feeling less than human, can't find work, running out of money etc...

Once I figured it out, I felt better and was able to apologise. Instead of yelling or swearing, I did my best passive aggressive chuckle, which I learned while I was married. Turns out that I can be less than understanding (jerk) when in fact I just want people to understand (notice) that I'm a human being. I had a counselor suggest that I always look at my part in any given situation, whether wrong or right, what did I do to contribute. This advice has helped me immensely, I am able to work out why I do what I do, I still make mistakes but I'm getting better at not repeating them. As always, I'm grateful for a place to put my thoughts.
 
B

bpd2020

Well-known member
Joined
May 25, 2020
Messages
982
Location
England
It takes a lot for us bpds to be able to look at things logically and not let our emotions lead us. You seem to have tackled the situation really well. You should feel proud.
 
R_Sxo

R_Sxo

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2017
Messages
2,861
Location
Pyongyang, DPRK
Nice! Reflecting on our behaviour and actions is a really important part of growing as a person, I'm happy for you :)
 
G

Girl interupted

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 17, 2018
Messages
1,974
Good for you! That’s huge! Tracing back the intent or origin of the emotion can be really hard, but I have found, like you, it diffuses the anger. Well done!
 
Koi1971

Koi1971

Member
Joined
Jun 7, 2020
Messages
22
Location
Casper Wyoming
I seem to always be analyzing my thought process, which is something quite different from past behavior, I appreciate the kind words, thank you.
 
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